Category Archives: self esteem

Rachel Naomi Remen on Reclaiming ourselves

Posted on March 6, 2018 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

“Reclaiming ourselves usually means coming to recognize and accept that we have in us both sides of everything. We are capable of fear and courage, generosity and selfishness, vulnerability and strength. These things do not cancel each other out but … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, compassion, empowerment, identity, internal locus of evaluation, perception, Rachel Naomi Remen, self, self concept, self esteem, shadow, vulnerability | Tagged acceptance and healing, accepting complexity, accepting yourself, affordable counselling exeter, authenticity, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, developing identity, empowerment, escaping binaries, escaping the binary, including yourself, individuation, internal locus, Kitchen Table Wisdom, low cost counselling exeter, maturation process, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, Rachel Naomi Remen, Rachel Remen, reclaiming ourselves, reclaiming shadow, self acceptance, self awareness, self compassion, self concept, self judgement, self kindness, self love, self value, self-structure, shortcomings, vulnerability, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Dr. Gabor Maté on Donald Trump, Traumaphobia & Compassion – John Lavitt

Posted on January 4, 2018 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

https://www.thefix.com/dr-gabor-mate-donald-trump-traumaphobia-and-compassion-interview ‘…a few days ago, I met a young woman who was an emergency room physician in Detroit, and she had graduated from medical school in Michigan. Although I knew the answer, I asked her how many lectures she had … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', abuse, acceptance, accountability, blaming, bullying, child development, childhood abuse, compassion, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, consciousness, criminal justice model, cultural questions, cultural taboos, dependence, Disconnection, empathy, encounter, ethics, external locus, family systems, fear, Gabor Mate, generational trauma, healing, identity, interconnection & belonging, kindness & compassion, meaning, objectification, paradigm shift, perception, political, power, power and powerlessness, psychiatry, research evidence, resilience, sadness & pain, scapegoating, self, self concept, self esteem, shadow, trauma, vulnerability | Tagged ACE, adaptive compensations, addict, addiction, addiction and trauma, addiction as choice, addiction as inherited brain disease, addiction as moral failing, addiction to profit, addiction treatment, addictive behaviors, addictive behaviours, addictive patterns, adult personality, affordable counselling exeter, being let down, belief systems, BEYOND DRUGS, brain as social organ, bullying, changing public perception, child development, child’s interaction with environment, childhood adversity, childhood circumstances and addiction, childhood trauma, combat veterans, compassion, compassionate treatment of addiction, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, connection with others, core fear, core pain, core threats, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, criminalising behaviour, criminalizing behaviour, cultural dysfunction, cultural hypocrisy, cultural oppression, demeaning, denial of climate change, denying dysfunctions, direction of healing, disappointed idealism, disappointed optimism, disillusionment, domineering personality, Donald Trump, Dr David E Smith, Dr Murthy, drug use, drugs and trauma, dysfunctional behavior, dysfunctional behaviour, dysfunctionality, dysfunctionality of addicted cerebrum, ego defence mechanism, ego defense mechanism, emotional environment, emotional environment and child development, emotional trauma, empathic resonance, empathy, escape from suffering, expanding self awareness, external locus, family systems, focus on capitalist growth, forced treatment, functionality, Gabor Mate, generational trauma, grandiosity, happiness index, helping people, humanity, idealistic hopes, in denial, inherited trauma, John Lavitt, judgment stigma and fear, lack of care, lack of nurture, lack of trauma services, lack of trauma treatment, loss of moral bearings, low cost counselling exeter, low self worth, mainstream medical views, marginalising, marginalizing, materialism, misogyny, narcissism, narcissist, narcissistic, narcissistic obsession with self, negative consequences, negative self worth, negative sense of self worth, not judging people, numbing, objectification, opioid epidemic, oppression, othering, overcoming systemic prejudice, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, paradigm shift, pathologising Donald Trump, pathologizing Donald Trump, pathology of Donald Trump, person centred counselling exeter, plank in eye, politics of oppression, power and powerlessness, power as marker of success, predisposition to addiction, projection, PTSD, PTSD and childhood trauma, punishing addicts, rageaholic, research on trauma, resistance to change, resistance to reality, role of trauma, role of trauma in addiction, seeing humanity in others, self awareness, self concept, self differentiation, self image, self-structure, sense of superiority, shadow, social exclusion, social ostracism, societal stigma, society in denial, substance use, survival mechanisms, systemic adjustment, systemic change, systemic reactions, the Haight Ashbury Free Clinic, toxic cultural norms, traumaphobia, traumaphobic, traumatised child, traumatized child, traumatized in childhood, Trump as cultural manifestation, Trump Clinton and Trauma, Trump is Obama’s legacy, understanding others, Universal Experience of Addiction, unresolved trauma, vulnerability, wealth as marker of success, why love matters, why was Trump elected, wilful ignorance, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Criticism: Are you willing to take the hit? Toko-pa

Posted on August 21, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Criticism: Are you willing to take the hit? Click on the above link to visit Toko-pa’s site for this helpful reflective piece, on our ability to receive criticism, and distinguish between what has the potential to teach us and what is … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, awakening, boundaries, congruence, consciousness, creativity, cultural questions, empowerment, external locus, fear, gratitude, identity, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, loneliness, loss, meaning, perception, relationship, resilience, self, self concept, self esteem, shame, shaming, Toko-pa, values & principles, vulnerability | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, ambiguity, art, articulating yourself, belonging, cheap criticism, constructive criticism, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creative cycle, creativity, creativity and criticism, destructive criticism, external locus, feeling criticised, feeling criticized, feeling shame, finding your voice, giving your gifts, inspiration, internal locus, low cost counselling exeter, meaningful criticism, medicine gifts, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, personal medicine, praise and gratitude, receiving criticism, relationship, resilience, shaming, soul path, soul purpose, the creative, Toko-pa, Tokopa, trusting your intention, uncovering your gifts, uncovering yourself, unique medicine, using criticism, vulnerability, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Kristina Kuzmic on valuing & offering our gifts

Posted on July 30, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

We like this. There’s a lot of positivity/law of attraction stuff around which seems unhelpful or even toxic – implying that, of we cannot feel better or improve our lives, we are somehow deficient or not trying hard enough … Continue reading →

Posted in actualizing tendency, community, compassion, core conditions, creativity, cultural questions, emotions, empowerment, encounter, gratitude, interconnection & belonging, kindness & compassion, love, power and powerlessness, presence, relationship, resilience, risk, sadness & pain, self, self concept, self esteem, vulnerability | Tagged actualising, actualizing, affordable counselling exeter, belonging, community, conditions of worth, connectedness, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, despair, empowering, empowerment, encounter, generosity, giving our gifts, hopelessness, human narratives, immediacy, importance of relationship, interbeing, interconnection, Kristina Kuzmic, law of attraction, low cost counselling exeter, low self esteem, negative emotion, negative feeling, negativity, offering our gifts, overriding feelings, overriding needs, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, positivity, presence, resilience, self accompaniment, self compassion, self concept, self esteeem, self support, suppressing emotion, suppressing feeling, telling ourselves stories, vulnerability, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Tomas Hunt on Navajo Dance

Posted on July 29, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Click on the link to visit Facebook for this lovely little film about finding aliveness in dance, moving through experiences of bullying and racism, and using dance to connect with people, ignite sparks of creativity and joy, and share … Continue reading →

Posted in bullying, consciousness, creativity, cultural questions, Dance, embodiment, empowerment, encounter, flow, growth, mindfulness, movement meditation, physical being, power and powerlessness, presence, sadness & pain, scapegoating, self concept, self esteem, surrender, trauma | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, aliveness, art therapy, conscious dance, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creative therapies, creativity, dance and therapy, dance and well being, dance as political, embodiment, experiences of bullying, experiences of racism, expressive therapies, holistic well being, immediacy, low cost counselling exeter, mindfulness, movement meditation, Navajo dance, Navajo hoop dance, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, presence, presence in the moment, sand play, sand tray, the here and now, Tomas Hunt, working with trauma, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

What Chester Bennington’s death tells us about mental health awareness

Posted on July 23, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

What Chester Bennington’s death tells us about mental health awareness Click on the link above for this wise, heartful post by an anonymous blogger who identifies as Dr Goat. This expresses much of how we make sense of human distress at … Continue reading →

Posted in anti-depressants, anti-psychotics, borderline personality disorder, CBT, childhood abuse, community, cultural questions, cultural taboos, diagnoses of bipolar, Disconnection, DSM, emotions, empowerment, ethics, external locus, healing, hearing voices, interconnection & belonging, medical model, non-directive counselling, Palace Gate Counselling Service, paradigm shift, perception, political, psychiatric abuse, psychiatric drugs, psychiatry, psychosis, relationship, sadness & pain, schizophrenia, self concept, self esteem, shame, shaming, therapeutic growth, therapeutic relationship, trauma, values & principles, violence, vulnerability, working with clients | Tagged 1 in 4, accessing support, accumulated distress, ACES, addiction, addressing past trauma, Adverse Childhood Exeperiences, adverse circumstances, adverse events, affordable counselling exeter, anxiety, anxiety and depression, art and trauma, being functional, bereaved by suicide, Big Phama, biomedical intervention, biomedical reductionism, building community, bullying, CBT, CBT as temporary fix, changing behaviour without addressing causes, chemical imbalance theory, Chester Bennington, childhood trauma, cognitive behavioural therapy, collective responsibility to each other, continuing adversity, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, coward’s way out, cuts to health and social care, dealing with abuse, dealing with neglect, dealing with violence, death by suicide, depression, depression as brain disorder, depression as disease, depression as illness, do mental health problems go away, DSM5, economic productivity as measure of worth, effect of bereavement, effect of trauma on health, effect of trauma on well being, emotional states, empathy, enhancing community, enhancing mental health, enhancing relationship, enhancing well being, equating medical with valid, expanded diagnostic criteria, expanding diagnostic criteria, expressing grief, expressing sadness, expressing sorrow, feeling ashamed, feeling embarrassed, feeling shame, fight flight freeze, grief process, grieving process, impact of bereavement, impact of trauma, impact of traumatic experience, individual pathology, interbeing, interconnection, interdependence, invalidating distress, judgemental, Linkin Park, loneliness, long term recovery, low cost counselling exeter, manifestations of mental distress, medical pathology, medical validation of distress, medicalisation of distress, medicalisation of emotion, medicalisation of feeling, medicalisation of human experience, medicalisation of sadness, medicalization of distress, medicalization of emotion, medicalization of feeling, medicalization of human experience, medicalization of sadness, mental distress, mental health awareness, mental health problems, mental health recovery, mental health stigma, mental health support, natural human reactions, need for recovery time, need for rest, need for time to adjust, normal emotions, not functioning, ongoing adversity, over medicalisation, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, parity of esteem, past trauma, person centred counselling exeter, person’s context, post traumatic stress, promoting mental health, promoting well being, psychiatric reductionism, public grief, pull yourself together, reactions to suicide, reductionism in biomedical model, relationship breakdown, relationship failure, responding to distress, sexual abuse, shame, social causes of mental distress, social causes of mental health problems, suicide is selfish, suicide narrative, underlying issues, understanding mental health, unresolved distress, vulnerability, whole person, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | 1 Comment

‘Giving up alcohol opened my eyes to the infuriating truth about why women drink’ Kristi Coulter

Posted on July 4, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

https://qz.com/762868/giving-up-alcohol-opened-my-eyes-to-the-infuriating-truth-about-why-women-drink/ Click on the above link to visit Quartz Media’s site, for Kristi’s great piece about women, alcohol and our culture. This is from a U.S. perspective – and feels just as relevant here. ‘We can’t afford to live lives … Continue reading →

Posted in abuse, acceptance, advertising, anger, autonomy, awakening, boundaries, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, consciousness, cultural questions, dependence, Disconnection, embodiment, equality, external locus, feminine, Gender & culture, gender identity, guilt, identity, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, mindfulness, non-conforming, objectification, organismic experiencing, perception, physical being, political, power and powerlessness, presence, reality, sadness & pain, self, self concept, self esteem, shadow, shame, shaming, trust | Tagged acceptance, accepting the unacceptable, addiction, addictive behaviour, affordable counselling exeter, altering natural responses, anger as energy, avoiding change, beer yoga, being a woman, being everything, being ignored, being interrupted, being shamed, being underestimated, being undermined, being who you are, belonging, body consciousness, body image, camouflage, compulsion, compulsive behaviour, conditioning, conditions of worth, conforming, conformity, conscious living, consciousness, controlling women’s bodies, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, cultural conditioning, cultural disembodiment, cultural pathology, cultural sickness, cultural trauma, dealing with bigotry, dealing with discrimination, dealing with prejudice, disconnecting, disconnecting from emotion, disconnecting from experiencing, disconnecting from feelings, disconnection, disembodied, displacement behaviour, dissociating, doing everything, drink as signifier, drivers, enjoying, enjoyment, equality, escaping reality, experiencing bigotry, experiencing discrimination, experiencing prejudice, facing reality, fairness, faking it, feminine conditioning, feminine role models, feminism, finding enjoyment, finding well being, First World Problems, First World woman, free time, gender oppression, gender privilege, generating well being, intolerable reality, invisibility, it’s not fair, Jiddu Krishnamurti, judginess, judging others, lack of equality, low cost counselling exeter, mansplaining, maternity leave, Matrix, micro aggressions, mindful savoring, mindful savouring, mindfulness, minimising, minimizing, misogyny, need for a drink, needing a drink, no acceptable way to be a woman, no easy way to be a woman, non conforming, non conformity, not knowing, numbing, numbing natural responses, objectification, objectifying, oppression, organismic, overriding yourself, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, paradigm shift, patriarchal attitudes, patriarchal oppression, patriarchy, peer pressure, perfection driver, perfectionism, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, Planned Parenthood, purpose of anger, sacred feminine, scarcity of role models, self acceptance, self care, self hatred, self love, self medicating, self rejection, self soothing, self trust, self-loathing, shame, shaming, shaming women, shrinking from reality, sick culture, sick society, sobriety, softening reality, softening the edges, supporting mothers, supporting women, systemic depletion, systemic exhaustion, telling women to smile, toughness, trusting natural responses, trusting who you are, trusting yourself, trying driver, using anger, Vinyasa & Vino, well-being, wetiko, Wetiko Capitalism, wetiko psychosis, Wetikonomy, women drinking, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Brené Brown on asking for help

Posted on June 23, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

“One of the greatest barriers to connection is the cultural importance we place on “going it alone.” Somehow we’ve come to equate success with not needing anyone. Many of us are willing to extend a helping hand, but we’re very … Continue reading →

Posted in autonomy, Brene Brown, communication, community, cultural questions, cultural taboos, Disconnection, equality, identity, interconnection & belonging, loneliness, relationship, self, self concept, self esteem, vulnerability | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, asking for help, autonomy, belonging, Brené Brown, can't ask for help, connectedness, connection, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, difficulty asking for help, Gifts of Imperfection, going it alone, interconnection, interdependence, low cost counselling exeter, need for social connection, neediness, needing each other, needy, not needing people, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, relationship and community, self concept, self sufficient, self-structure, social isolation, us and them, vulnerability, wounded healer, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

‘People (often) don’t need help. They need love. Acceptance’ Monica Cassani

Posted on June 12, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

People (often) don’t need help. They need love. Acceptance. Click on the above link to visit Monica Cassani’s superb resource site: http://www.beyondmeds.com This post describes person-centred in a nutshell, and is what we seek to offer at this service: holding loving … Continue reading →

Posted in actualizing tendency, autonomy, client as 'expert', congruence, consciousness, core conditions, cultural questions, empathy, empowerment, encounter, equality, ethics, external locus, growth, healing, love, Monica Cassani, non-directive counselling, Palace Gate Counselling Service, person centred, person centred theory, power and powerlessness, psychiatry, self, self concept, self esteem, therapeutic growth, therapeutic relationship, working with clients | Tagged acceptance, acceptance in relationship, acceptance in therapy, actualising, actualizing, affordable counselling exeter, autonomy in counselling, autonomy in therapy, being broken, brokenness, client as expert, client as whole, core conditions, counselling ethics, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, diminishing relationship, discovering who you are, disempowering, disempowerment in counselling, disempowerment in therapy, egalitarianism, empowering, encounter, equality in therapy, ethic of service, external locus, feeling broken, fixing and helping, healing power of acceptance, helping and fixing, holding space, holistic approach, holistic approach to mental illness, holistic well being, in it together, inner journey, inner landscape, inner work, interior landscape, labeling, labelling, Lived Experience, low cost counselling exeter, mental health labels, mental health model, Monica Cassani, need for acceptance, non hierarchical relationship, non-directive counselling, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, perpetrating counsellor, perpetrating healer, perpetrating therapist, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, personhood, politics of oppression, providing support, Rachel Naomi Remen, reductive relationship, safe space, self concept, self esteem, self-structure, sense of wholeness, space holding, unconditional positive regard, UPR, www.beyondmeds.com, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Jordan Peterson on Finding a Voice

Posted on June 4, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

The writer has a sense that she and Jordan might see some fundamental things differently….and she is pretty much word for word with him on this, although (at least sometimes) she might say it with softer energies these days…. … Continue reading →

Posted in accountability, actualizing tendency, blaming, bullying, civil rights, communication, conditions of worth, congruence, cultural questions, diversity, education, empowerment, ethics, fear, identity, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, meaning, non-conforming, perception, political, power and powerlessness, presence, risk, scapegoating, self concept, self esteem, shaming, trauma, violence, vulnerability | Tagged accountability, actualising, actualizing, affordable counselling exeter, attachment to outcome, authentic expression, authenticity, being articulate, blaming and shaming, bullying, choosing consequences, choosing your consequences, closing down free speech, closing people down, coercive control, collective scapegoating, conditions of worth, congruence, connectedness, connection, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creating meaning, degrees of separation, diversity, dynamics of oppression, empowerment, ethics and responsibility, existential meaning, facing the consequences, feeling safe to speak, free speech, group mentality, human networks, interconnection, internal locus, investing in outcome, investment in outcome, Jordan Peterson, living in a bubble, living in a vacuum, living with consequences, logocentricity, longing for truth, low cost counselling exeter, mob mentality, motivation for nihilism, non conforming, not safe to speak, oppressive behaviour, order and chaos, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, personal responsibility, power of speech, power of truth, procrastinating, procrastination, quest for meaning, say what you think, saying what you think, scapegoating, self realisation, self realization, self respect, self-responsibility, shaming, shaming as bloodsport, shaming as control, speaking out, speaking your truth, speech as divine, stand up for your truth, taking risks, tell the truth, upstanding, value of authenticity, value of truth, web of life, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

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