Category Archives: bullying

Dr. Gabor Maté on Donald Trump, Traumaphobia & Compassion – John Lavitt

Posted on January 4, 2018 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

https://www.thefix.com/dr-gabor-mate-donald-trump-traumaphobia-and-compassion-interview ‘…a few days ago, I met a young woman who was an emergency room physician in Detroit, and she had graduated from medical school in Michigan. Although I knew the answer, I asked her how many lectures she had … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', abuse, acceptance, accountability, blaming, bullying, child development, childhood abuse, compassion, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, consciousness, criminal justice model, cultural questions, cultural taboos, dependence, Disconnection, empathy, encounter, ethics, external locus, family systems, fear, Gabor Mate, generational trauma, healing, identity, interconnection & belonging, kindness & compassion, meaning, objectification, paradigm shift, perception, political, power, power and powerlessness, psychiatry, research evidence, resilience, sadness & pain, scapegoating, self, self concept, self esteem, shadow, trauma, vulnerability | Tagged ACE, adaptive compensations, addict, addiction, addiction and trauma, addiction as choice, addiction as inherited brain disease, addiction as moral failing, addiction to profit, addiction treatment, addictive behaviors, addictive behaviours, addictive patterns, adult personality, affordable counselling exeter, being let down, belief systems, BEYOND DRUGS, brain as social organ, bullying, changing public perception, child development, child’s interaction with environment, childhood adversity, childhood circumstances and addiction, childhood trauma, combat veterans, compassion, compassionate treatment of addiction, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, connection with others, core fear, core pain, core threats, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, criminalising behaviour, criminalizing behaviour, cultural dysfunction, cultural hypocrisy, cultural oppression, demeaning, denial of climate change, denying dysfunctions, direction of healing, disappointed idealism, disappointed optimism, disillusionment, domineering personality, Donald Trump, Dr David E Smith, Dr Murthy, drug use, drugs and trauma, dysfunctional behavior, dysfunctional behaviour, dysfunctionality, dysfunctionality of addicted cerebrum, ego defence mechanism, ego defense mechanism, emotional environment, emotional environment and child development, emotional trauma, empathic resonance, empathy, escape from suffering, expanding self awareness, external locus, family systems, focus on capitalist growth, forced treatment, functionality, Gabor Mate, generational trauma, grandiosity, happiness index, helping people, humanity, idealistic hopes, in denial, inherited trauma, John Lavitt, judgment stigma and fear, lack of care, lack of nurture, lack of trauma services, lack of trauma treatment, loss of moral bearings, low cost counselling exeter, low self worth, mainstream medical views, marginalising, marginalizing, materialism, misogyny, narcissism, narcissist, narcissistic, narcissistic obsession with self, negative consequences, negative self worth, negative sense of self worth, not judging people, numbing, objectification, opioid epidemic, oppression, othering, overcoming systemic prejudice, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, paradigm shift, pathologising Donald Trump, pathologizing Donald Trump, pathology of Donald Trump, person centred counselling exeter, plank in eye, politics of oppression, power and powerlessness, power as marker of success, predisposition to addiction, projection, PTSD, PTSD and childhood trauma, punishing addicts, rageaholic, research on trauma, resistance to change, resistance to reality, role of trauma, role of trauma in addiction, seeing humanity in others, self awareness, self concept, self differentiation, self image, self-structure, sense of superiority, shadow, social exclusion, social ostracism, societal stigma, society in denial, substance use, survival mechanisms, systemic adjustment, systemic change, systemic reactions, the Haight Ashbury Free Clinic, toxic cultural norms, traumaphobia, traumaphobic, traumatised child, traumatized child, traumatized in childhood, Trump as cultural manifestation, Trump Clinton and Trauma, Trump is Obama’s legacy, understanding others, Universal Experience of Addiction, unresolved trauma, vulnerability, wealth as marker of success, why love matters, why was Trump elected, wilful ignorance, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Spinning Straw – Tracy Cochran

Posted on September 12, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

https://parabola.org/2017/07/30/spinning-straw-by-tracy-cochran/?utm_content=buffer9bcb5&utm_medium=social&utm_source=facebook.com&utm_campaign=buffer Click on the link above to visit the site for Parabola Magazine for this remarkable reworking of the Brothers Grimm. It is not long since we published a piece by Tracy – but the writer stumbled upon this at … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', abuse, acceptance, accountability, autonomy, beauty, blaming, boundaries, bullying, cognitive, compassion, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, consciousness, consent, core conditions, creativity, cultural questions, Disconnection, embodiment, emotions, empathy, empowerment, fear, feminine, good, gratitude, grief, growth, guilt, identity, interconnection & belonging, kindness & compassion, loneliness, loss, love, meaning, metaphor & dream, objectification, perception, power, power and powerlessness, relationship, resilience, sadness & pain, self, self concept, shadow, surrender, Tracy Cochran, transformation, vulnerability | Tagged abandonment, abuse of power, acceptance by the tribe, affordable counselling exeter, aliveness, aloneness, ancestors, armouring, Arthur Rackham, asking the impossible, autonomy, autonomy and acceptance, autonomy and belonging, bargaining, being in the shadows, being invisible, being left, being more, being unable to hold boundaries, betrayal, betraying love, betraying truth, betraying what you love, bitterness, boundaries, Brothers Grimm, causing harm, compassion, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, craving life, cut off from life, dare to be straw, deepest humanity, desecrated, desperation, diminishing ourselves, disconnection, divided, doing more, doing the math, ego mind, embodiment, empathy, emptiness, empty life, entitlement, everyone is special, everything is sacred, everything is special, evolutionary biology, existential emptiness, existential meaning, fairy tales, fear as a driver, fear of death, fear of loss, fear reaction, feeding people, feeling connected, feeling invisible, finding a place, finding balance, finding your reflection in another, folklore, fully alive, good enough, Great Mystery, guilt, having a place, having choice, heartfulness, here and now, holding yourself apart from love, holy work, how to live, humility, identity, inner smallness, internal division, invading boundaries, isolating behaviour, joy of connecting, joy of connection, keeping yourself alone, keeping yourself separate, knowing another, knowing each other, lacking choice, learning how to live, life is more precious than gold, listening without judgment, little rattle stilt, living experience, living fully, locating yourself, losing yourself, loss and grief, low cost counselling exeter, meeting needs indirectly, meeting needs obliquely, metamorphosis, metaphor, mind limitation, mind trap, mirror of another, mirror of love, mortality, myth, nameless, needing others, newborn, no such thing as magic, no-one is special, non possessive love, not good enough, not knowing yourself, not special, nothing is sacred, nothing is special, objectification, objectifying, ordinary and sacred, othering, otherworldly, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, power and powerlessness, power over, present moment, privilege, promises and betrayal, pure love, rage, reflection of love, relationship as transaction, remembering ourselves, resilience, responding and reacting, Rumplestiltskin, sacred love, sacredness, science and magic, science not magic, self acceptance, self armouring, self awareness, self betrayal, self concept, self denigration, self enclosed, self enclosure, self hate, self isolation, self knowledge, self limitation, self love, self rejection, self-structure, sense of sacred, shadow, small self, speaking unwisely, speaking wildly, spinning straw, spinning straw into gold, splitting, story-telling, stuckness, submissiveness, submitting, surrender, survival and acceptance, survival and belonging, telling tales, the first mother, The Heart of Oak Books, the wheel turned, the witness, Tracy Cochran, transformation, transience, trapped in your head, trying to explain, trying to save ourselves, trying to save yourself, turning wheel, unbounded love, unconditional love, using others, value of being alive, value of life, wanting approval, wanting closeness, wanting connection, wanting to be acceptable, wanting to be close, wanting to be known, wanting to be seen, wanting to belong, wanting to feel important, wanting to matter, wanting to please, web of life, what keeps us from love, wholesome work, without consent, without judgment, witnessing consciousness, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Tomas Hunt on Navajo Dance

Posted on July 29, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Click on the link to visit Facebook for this lovely little film about finding aliveness in dance, moving through experiences of bullying and racism, and using dance to connect with people, ignite sparks of creativity and joy, and share … Continue reading →

Posted in bullying, consciousness, creativity, cultural questions, Dance, embodiment, empowerment, encounter, flow, growth, mindfulness, movement meditation, physical being, power and powerlessness, presence, sadness & pain, scapegoating, self concept, self esteem, surrender, trauma | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, aliveness, art therapy, conscious dance, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creative therapies, creativity, dance and therapy, dance and well being, dance as political, embodiment, experiences of bullying, experiences of racism, expressive therapies, holistic well being, immediacy, low cost counselling exeter, mindfulness, movement meditation, Navajo dance, Navajo hoop dance, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, presence, presence in the moment, sand play, sand tray, the here and now, Tomas Hunt, working with trauma, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

The Loneliness of Donald Trump – Rebecca Solnit

Posted on June 29, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://lithub.com/rebecca-solnit-the-loneliness-of-donald-trump/ Click on the link above to visit http://www.lithub.com for this perceptive and sad piece by Rebecca. ““They were careless people,” F. Scott Fitzgerald wrote of the rich couple at the heart of The Great Gatsby. “They smashed up things and … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', accountability, boundaries, bullying, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, consciousness, cultural questions, Disconnection, empathy, equality, ethics, identity, interconnection & belonging, loneliness, meaning, metaphor & dream, objectification, person centred, political, power, power and powerlessness, reality, self, self concept, shadow, shame, shaming, trauma | Tagged A New York City Atlas, absolute power, addictive behaviour, affordable counselling exeter, alternative facts, always wanting more, American buffoon, awareness, awareness of oneself in relation to others, awareness of others, be careful what you wish for, being closed to others, being mocked, belonging, breaking things, bully of fact, bullying, butt of jokes, calling to account, collective shadow, compulsion, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, consciousness, consumer society, consumerism, cooperative relationship, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, covfefe, craving, cultural shadow, democracy of mind and heart, democracy of social discourse, derision, destructive pride, distorted reality, distorted sense of self, Donald Trump, Dorian Gray, echo chamber, ego mind, egomaniacs, enduring challenge, enduring contradiction, equality, equality keeps us honest, everyone is important, existential meaning, expanding awareness, experiencing mockery, experiencing shame, F Scott Fitzgerald, fake university, feeding the beast, feeling worthless, Fisherman's Wife, flattery, fortune’s fool, free press, gaining awareness, grasp exceeding understanding, graven image, hall of mirrors, Hannah Arendt, harming others, hedonism, hubris, hungry ghost, image building, importance of boundaries, importance of consequences, importance of limits, indulgence, inner dialogue, inner ethical compass, insatiable greed, interbeing, internal ethical system, inward ethical system, isolation, it’s not about you, Karma, karmic balance, Krista Tippet, lack of awareness, loneliness, lonely at the top, low cost counselling exeter, Lyndsey Stonebridge, making demands, materialism, meaninglessness, Midas touch, mirroring, moral world, narcissists, need for flattery, nemesis, no concept of otherness, no concept of others, Nonstop Metropolis, objectification, objectifying, Occupy Wall Street, On Being, On the Origins of Totalitarianism, overreach, overreaching, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, peer feedback, person centred counselling exeter, personal shadow, power and glory, power and prominence, power corrupts, powerlessness, powerlessness and inauthenticity, powerlessness and pretence, pretending, privilege, privilege and oblivion, privilege and obliviousness, Pushkin, Rebecca Solnit, reductionism, reflecting mirror, relational responsibility, reputational damage, responsibility to other, retribution, rule of law, self concept, self destruction, self harming, self hatred, self imposed isolation, self protection, self reflection, self-destructive behaviour, self-loathing, self-responsibility, self-structure, sense of self, shadow, shaming, slow suicide, social responsibility, sociopaths, solipsism, subordinating the system of government, suppressing evidence, the banality of evil, The Fisherman and the Golden Fish, The Great Gatsby, The Mother of All Questions, the void, trauma, tyranny, vast carelessness, wanting to have your own way, willingness, worthlessness, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Jordan Peterson on Finding a Voice

Posted on June 4, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

The writer has a sense that she and Jordan might see some fundamental things differently….and she is pretty much word for word with him on this, although (at least sometimes) she might say it with softer energies these days…. … Continue reading →

Posted in accountability, actualizing tendency, blaming, bullying, civil rights, communication, conditions of worth, congruence, cultural questions, diversity, education, empowerment, ethics, fear, identity, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, meaning, non-conforming, perception, political, power and powerlessness, presence, risk, scapegoating, self concept, self esteem, shaming, trauma, violence, vulnerability | Tagged accountability, actualising, actualizing, affordable counselling exeter, attachment to outcome, authentic expression, authenticity, being articulate, blaming and shaming, bullying, choosing consequences, choosing your consequences, closing down free speech, closing people down, coercive control, collective scapegoating, conditions of worth, congruence, connectedness, connection, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creating meaning, degrees of separation, diversity, dynamics of oppression, empowerment, ethics and responsibility, existential meaning, facing the consequences, feeling safe to speak, free speech, group mentality, human networks, interconnection, internal locus, investing in outcome, investment in outcome, Jordan Peterson, living in a bubble, living in a vacuum, living with consequences, logocentricity, longing for truth, low cost counselling exeter, mob mentality, motivation for nihilism, non conforming, not safe to speak, oppressive behaviour, order and chaos, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, personal responsibility, power of speech, power of truth, procrastinating, procrastination, quest for meaning, say what you think, saying what you think, scapegoating, self realisation, self realization, self respect, self-responsibility, shaming, shaming as bloodsport, shaming as control, speaking out, speaking your truth, speech as divine, stand up for your truth, taking risks, tell the truth, upstanding, value of authenticity, value of truth, web of life, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Woman was too scared to leave job centre during a heart attack, fearing sanctions – Kitty S Jones

Posted on May 26, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

https://kittysjones.wordpress.com/2017/05/20/woman-was-too-scared-to-leave-job-centre-during-a-heart-attack-as-she-feared-being-sanctioned/ Click on the above link to visit Kitty’s blog for this piece on the brutal, damaging DWP work assessment system. This begins with one woman’s appalling experience, and then makes some general points. Kitty refers to Ken Loach’s powerful, … Continue reading →

Posted in abuse, acceptance, awakening, bullying, civil rights, cognitive, community, compassion, cultural questions, Disconnection, empathy, empowerment, ethics, interconnection & belonging, James Hillman, kindness & compassion, Palace Gate Counselling Service, perception, political, power and powerlessness, reality, sadness & pain, shadow, trauma, violence, vulnerability | Tagged accurate perception, affordable counselling exeter, alienation, anesthetised heart, anesthetized heart, ATOS, austerity, authenticity and realism, basic survival needs, Benefit Conditionality and Sanctions, benefit sanctions, benefit sanctions regime, benefits enforcement, Camilla Long on Daniel Blake, cognitive dissonance, collective fugue, collective trauma, compassion, Conservative treatment of disabled, Conservative welfare reforms, cost of sanctions, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, cruelty of sanctions, cultural disconnection, cuts to frontline services, Damian Green, Daniel Blake, David Clapson, David Sugg, death after being found fit for work, demystification, disability benefits, disconnection, discriminating against disabled people, disempowerment, distorted reality, distorting reality, DWP, DWP made up claimants, Equality Trust, erosion of social security, fear of being sanctioned, fictional sanctions stories, fit for work, fugue state, George Vranikovic, Hayley Squires, I Daniel Blake, Iain Duncan Smith, in work conditionality, in work progression interviews, incentivising people into work, ineffectiveness of sanctions, irresponsible journalism, James Hillman, Ken Loach, Kitty S Jones, lacking compassion, losing benefits, low cost counselling exeter, Maximus, mental health and work capability assessments, moving people off benefits, mystification, National Audit Office on sanctions, neoliberalism, no financial safety net, non compliance, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, Paul Dennett, person centred counselling exeter, political ideology, psychological distress, punitive sanctions, Salena Hannah, sanction scheme, sanctions, sanctions barrier, sanctions demotivator, Sheila Holt, social security system, Steve McCall, sudden loss of income, suicide and work capability assessments, survival needs, Susan Roberts, Tim Roache, Toby Young on Daniel Blake, trauma and reality perception, trauma responses, universal basic income, use of food banks, vulnerable claimants, vulnerable people, Wanda Wyporska, welfare conditionality, welfare enforcement, welfare expenditure, welfare reforms, welfare sanctions, withholding benefits, work capability assessment, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

‘Is mental illness real?’ Jay Watts

Posted on April 19, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2017/apr/12/is-mental-illness-real-google-answer?CMP=share_btn_tw Click on the above link for this interesting and important piece in the Guardian’s ‘Comment is free’ section, showing how these perceptions are gradually making it into the mainstream media…which is encouraging. For the writer, Jay still speaks in … Continue reading →

Posted in anti-depressants, anti-psychotics, autonomy, bullying, civil rights, compassion, cultural questions, diagnoses of bipolar, emotions, empathy, equality, ethics, external locus, family systems, generational trauma, healing, hearing voices, internal locus of evaluation, kindness & compassion, medical model, paradigm shift, perception, political, power, power and powerlessness, psychiatric abuse, psychiatric drugs, psychiatry, psychosis, research evidence, risk, sadness & pain, schizophrenia, shadow, trauma, violence, vulnerability | Tagged adverse childhood events, adverse childhood experience, Adverse Childhood Experience studies, adverse social conditions, affordable counselling exeter, alienation, anxiety, biased research outcomes in mental health, biased research outcomes in psychiatry, Big Pharma, biomedical intervention, biomedical model, biomedical reductionism, bipolar affective disorder, bullying, chemical imbalance myth, childhood adversity, childhood adversity and mental health, childhood experience, childhood sexual abuse, childhood trauma, cognitive dissonance, competitive culture, conceptualising distress as an illness, conceptualizing distress as an illness, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, CSA, dangers of antipsychotics, denying people’s truth, depression, disease and disorder model, displacement, distress and inflammation, distress and trauma, early separation, embodied response, emotional abuse, emotional neglect, environmental causes of distress, family interventions, family systems, hyper alert, hyper vigilance, inner world, invalidation, Is mental illness real, Jay Watts, just like any other illness narrative, Lived Experience, low cost counselling exeter, making sense of human suffering, making sense of suffering, medical reductionism, medicalisation of distress, medicalisation of emotion, medicalisation of feeling, medicalisation of human experience, medicalisation of sadness, medicalising childhood, medicalising distress, medicalization, medicalization of distress, medicalization of emotion, medicalization of feeling, medicalization of human experience, medicalization of sadness, medicalizing childhood, medicalizing distress, mental health, mental health constructs, mental health policy, mental health stigma, mental illness, mental illness constructs, neurobiological paradigm, over prescription of psychotropic drugs, overprescription of antidepressants, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, paradigm shift, patriarchal model, patriarchy, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, pharmaceutical industry, physical abuse, politics of oppression, power relationships, privileging the biological, psychiatric model, psychiatric reductionism, psychosocial model, Recovery in the Bin, reductionism, reductionism in biomedical model, reductionism in psychiatry, reductive neurobiological paradigm, reductive paradigm, schizophrenia, scientific reductionism, separation, serotonin imbalance myth, sexual abuse in childhood, social effects of inequality, social effects of poverty, social exclusion, social factors in human distress, social inequalities, social norms, social problems, structural inequalities, structural oppressions, talking about mental health, toxic families, toxic injustice, toxic stress, unconscious bias, unequal power relationships, us and them, vulnerability, working with borderline, working with BPD, working with psychosis, working with schizophrenia, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Gil Bailie on the Crucifixion & Blame

Posted on April 15, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

“The surest way to miss the link between the cure (the crucifixion and its aftereffects) and the disease (the structures of scapegoating violence upon which all human social arrangements have depended) is to read the passion story with an eye … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', accountability, awakening, blaming, bullying, civil rights, community, compassion, conditions of worth, conflict, congruence, core conditions, criminal justice model, cultural questions, Disconnection, empathy, ethics, external locus, fear, guilt, human condition, identity, interconnection & belonging, kindness & compassion, love, meaning, objectification, perception, person centred, person centred theory, political, power and powerlessness, presence, sadness & pain, scapegoating, self, self concept, self esteem, shadow, shame, shaming, spirituality, trauma, trust, violence | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, aggression of blame, blame, blame and responsibility, blaming, collective responsibility, collective scapegoating, collective shadow, commitment to self, compassion, conditional love, conditions of worth, connection, contempt of others, core beliefs, core conditions, core wounding, core wounds, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, cultural projection, cultural violence, empathic connection, empathic failure, empathy, encounter, expanding awareness, failure of empathy, finger pointing, Gil Bailie, hopelessness, human limitations, human needs, invalidation, inward enquiry, inwards enquiry, kindness, lack of validation, Lived Experience, loving kindness, low cost counselling exeter, low self esteem, meaning of evil, meaning of the crucifixion, need to be received, need to be seen, need to be witnessed, not good enough, open heart, own being, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, personal development, personal responsibility, personal shadow, phenomenological approach, presence, projecting, projecting shadow, projection, relationship, religious violence, sacred violence, scapegoating, self awareness, self blame, self care, self compassion, self concept, self contempt, self enquiry, self esteem, self expression, self judgement, self judgment, self perception, self worth, self-responsibility, self-structure, separation, shame, shaming, spirituality, suppressing need, suppressing self expression, trust, unlived life, unmet need, validation, validation of needs, Violence Unveiled, wholeness, withdrawal, witnessing, worth as a person, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

‘Trump, Clinton and Trauma’ Gabor Maté

Posted on March 2, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

https://drgabormate.com/trump-clinton-trauma/ Click on the link above for this perceptive, accurate and topical article from Gabor from last October – before the U.S. presidential result – on trauma markers in our political leaders, and how levels of trauma normalized in our … Continue reading →