Monthly Archives: November 2016

Hello self-loathing, my old friend – Elisabeth Svanholmer

Posted on November 29, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Hello Self-loathing, my old friend… Click on the link above to visit Elisabeth’s website – http://www.livinglifegently.live – to read this post. The writer experiences regular turns of this wheel herself, and so do most of those she works with. Elisabeth’s perspective … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, autonomy, conditions of worth, cultural questions, cultural taboos, emotions, empathy, encounter, equality, ethics, external locus, guilt, hearing voices, immanence, internal locus of evaluation, Jung, kindness & compassion, perception, power and powerlessness, sadness & pain, self, self concept, self esteem, shadow, shame, unconditional positive regard, values & principles, violence, vulnerability | Tagged acceptance, affirmations, alienation, attachment to beliefs, attempt to reassure, autonomy, awareness, being alongside, being disliked, being judged, belief and sense of purpose, belief systems, better than, body shame, boundaries, cocooning, colluding, community, configurations of self, conflicting beliefs, connection, core belief, cycles of anxiety, cycles of overwhelm, cycles of self loathing, cycles of shame, darker side of being human, death cafes, desire to be hurt, desire to hurt, dialoguing, differing perceptions, differing realities, differing understandings, difficult emotions, discerning, dishonesty, distressing belief, distrust, Elisabeth Svanholmer, emotional withdrawal, emotions, equality, ethical standards, existential meaning, expanding awareness, expressing needs, expression of needs, feeling ashamed of fantasies, feeling ashamed of thoughts, feeling chosen, feeling disconnected, feeling dismissed, feeling frustrated, feeling powerless, feeling special, feeling superior, feeling unacceptable, feeling undeserving, feeling unlovable, feeling unworthy, finding hope, fixing, giving yourself permission, gratitude, hardwired for connection, harshness, harshness to self, hating yourself, having horrible thoughts, hearing multiple voices, hearing voices, hiding from others, hiding from self, higher power, holding beliefs lightly, holding reality lightly, holding space, honouring parts of self, hopefulness, horribleness, human needs, humble, humility, immanence, incongruence, inferiority, intentions, keeping safe, making sense of experience, megalomania, not knowing, numbing, offering reassurance, organising experiences, others’ expectations, pain of self loathing, pep talks, perceptions, pleasing everybody, pleasing people, positive affirmations, protective beliefs, proving yourself, reassuring, recognition, repression, rescuing, secret keeping, seeking approval, seeking reassurance, seeking relief, self care, self compassion, self concept, self containment, self empathy, self hate, self love, self pity, self protection, self talk, self-loathing, self-structure, sense of equality, sense of purpose, shadow, shame, shameful dreams, simplifying beliefs, something wrong with me, spiritual bypass, states of being, staying safe, superiority, suppression, taboos, temporary emotional states, trust, trying to be liked, uncertainty, uncertainty of multiple realities, uncomfortable emotions, unconditional positive regard, unconscious behaviour, unconscious living, unique being, violence, violence to self, Voice Dialogue, withdrawing, witnessing, worthiness, www.livinglifegently.live | Leave a comment

Brené Brown on Courage

Posted on November 26, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

“Courage is a heart word. The root of the word courage is cor – the Latin word for heart. In one of its earliest forms, the word courage meant “To speak one’s mind by telling all one’s heart.” Over time, … Continue reading →

Posted in Brene Brown, compassion, congruence, core conditions, cultural questions, emotions, empathy, empowerment, encounter, feminine, Gender & culture, interconnection & belonging, kindness & compassion, love, person centred, relationship, risk, shame, trust, vulnerability, working with clients | Tagged achievement, achievement culture, affordable counselling exeter, authenticity, being open, being seen, belonging, Brené Brown, compassion, connectedness, connecting with others, connection, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, courage, culture of shame, de-armoring, de-armouring, empathy, existential meaning, heart connection, heart language, heart words, human connection, I Thought It Was Just Me, inner stength, low cost counselling exeter, making connection, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, personal commitment, reclaiming, reclaiming power, risk, shame, sharing narrative, sharing personal experiences, sharing your story, show up and be seen, showing up, speaking from the heart, speaking openly, vulnerability, whole heart, willingness to be seen, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

“Poetry” Pablo Neruda

Posted on November 24, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

“And it was at that age… Poetry arrived in search of me. I don’t know, I don’t know where it came from, from winter or a river. I don’t know how or when, no, they were not voices, they were … Continue reading →

Posted in awakening, beauty, consciousness, creativity, immanence, meaning, metaphor & dream, organismic experiencing, Pablo Neruda, perception, poetry, presence, spirituality, surrender, transformation, wonder | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, alchemy of art, alchemy of poetry, Anthony Kerrigan, art and transformation, awakening, consciousness, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creative energies, creative spirit, creativity, existential meaning, immanence, low cost counselling exeter, meaning of life, Pablo Neruda, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, poet's art, poetry, poetry and transformation, purpose of art, purpose of poetry, sacredness, soul contract, transformation, writing poetry, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Pema Chodron on Relaxing with impermanence (on her 80th birthday)

Posted on November 23, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Click on the link to see this little film of Pema at 80, speaking about the fear of death and how we may learn to approach our dying. ‘When the appearances of this life dissolve, may I with ease and … Continue reading →

Posted in Chogyam Trungpa, consciousness, cultural questions, dying, emotions, fear, human condition, loss, meditation, Pema Chödrön, perception, physical being, power and powerlessness, resilience, self, spirituality, surrender, transformation, vulnerability | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, aging, aliveness, attachment, being with fear, being with panic, brevity of life, Chogyam Trungpa, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, death and rebirth, dramas of life, embracing impermanence, embracing transience, facing change, fear of aging, fear of change, fear of death, fear of groundlessness, fearing death, feeling terror, gratitude, groundlessness, impermanence, life review, low cost counselling exeter, mortality, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, Pema Chödrön, person centred counselling exeter, preparing for death, reincarnation, resilience, returning home, spirituality, surrender, terror, transformation, transience, valuing life, vulnerability, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

What it Really Means to Hold Space for Someone – Heather Plett

Posted on November 21, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

What it Really Means to Hold Space for Someone Click on the above link for this wonderful piece on Uplift Connect from May this year by Heather – not generally a fan of ‘8 tips’ type articles, but been meaning … Continue reading →

Posted in autonomy, boundaries, client as 'expert', communication, compassion, congruence, core conditions, emotions, empathy, empowerment, encounter, equality, ethics, grief, growth, internal locus of evaluation, non-directive counselling, Palace Gate Counselling Service, person centred, power and powerlessness, resilience, risk, self concept, shadow, shame, shaming, supervision, transformation, trauma, trust, values & principles, vulnerability, working with clients | Tagged accompanying someone, affordable counselling exeter, autonomy, autonomy to make choices, beating yourself up, being lost, being there for someone, brokenness, coaching skills, compassion, complex emotions, counselling exeter, counselling skills, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, courage to take risks, creating a container, creating safe space, cultural norms, dealing with an addiction, dependence, disempowering, diversity, ego trap, emotional growth, empowering, ethic of service, facilitating skills, falling apart, fear, fear of falling apart, feeling broken, feeling empowered, feeling incompetent, feeling lost, feeling safe, feeling unworthy, feeling useless, fixing people, gentle guidance, giving guidance, giving permission, going through transition, grief, grieving, Heather Plett, holding space, holding the rim, honouring difference, humility, learning from mistakes, listening skills, low cost counselling exeter, making mistakes, making space, meaningful work, non directive, non judgemental listening, non judgmental, offering guidance, offering support, okay to make mistakes, overcoming ego, overwhelming, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, personal growth, personal shadow, preoccupation with self, psychological growth, resilience, respecting difference, risks and growth, sacred space, safe enough to fail, safe space, self absorption, self care, self concept, self concern, self other distinction, self worth, self-structure, serving others, shadow work, shaming, spiritual growth, supervision support, support not control, support system, supporting others, supporting someone who is anxious, supporting someone who is depressed, supporting someone who is grieving, supporting someone who is suicidal, taking power away, taking risks, teaching skills, tenderness, thoughtfulness, transformation, transition, trauma, trust, trusting intuition, trusting your own wisdom, trusting yourself, unconditional relationship, unconditional support, unconditionality, Uplift Connect, vulnerability, vulnerable, walking alongside, what it means to hold space, withholding judgement, working at depth, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

John O’Donohue on the quiet light in each heart

Posted on November 19, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Click on the link for this John O’Donohue quote on Facebook – gentle, beautiful, true. Palace Gate Counselling Service, Exeter Counselling in Exeter since 1994

Posted in actualizing tendency, awakening, beauty, consciousness, creativity, good, growth, human condition, immanence, John O'Donohue, kindness & compassion, love, meaning, presence, spirituality | Tagged actualising, actualizing, affordable counselling exeter, aliveness, awakening, Benedictus, Bless the Space Between Us, collective consciousness, collective dream, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, existential meaning, immanence, innate goodness, inner light, John O'Donohue, longing, loving life, low cost counselling exeter, nourishment, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, passion for life, person centred counselling exeter, presence, quickening, replenishment, sense of beauty, solace, spiritual meaning, spiritual nourishment, spirituality, sustenance, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Thomas Merton on Acceptance

Posted on November 17, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

“Finally I am coming to the conclusion that my highest ambition is to be what I already am. That I will never fulfill my obligation to surpass myself unless I first accept myself, and if I accept myself fully in … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, actualizing tendency, consciousness, core conditions, growth, meaning, person centred, person centred theory, Thomas Merton | Tagged acceptance, actualising, actualizing, affordable counselling exeter, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, existential meaning, low cost counselling exeter, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, purpose of life, self acceptance, soul contract, soul purpose, Thomas Merton, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Walt Whitman on being a poem

Posted on November 15, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

“This is what you shall do; Love the earth and sun and the animals, despise riches, give alms to every one that asks, stand up for the stupid and crazy, devote your income and labor to others, hate tyrants, argue … Continue reading →

Posted in autonomy, beauty, creativity, embodiment, empowerment, human condition, meaning, spirituality | Tagged activism, affordable counselling exeter, aliveness, altruism, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, existential meaning, Leaves of Grass, low cost counselling exeter, meaning of life, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, purpose of life, Walt Whitman, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

The Election: Of Hate, Grief, and a New Story – Charles Eisenstein

Posted on November 14, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

The Election: Of Hate, Grief, and a New Story Click on the link to visit Charles’ website and read this essay. In the writer’s view, Charles is one of the visionaries and big thinkers of our time, because he speaks … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', accountability, anger, awakening, blaming, Charles Eisenstein, civil rights, compassion, conflict, congruence, core conditions, creativity, cultural questions, Disconnection, ecological, ecological issues, empathy, empowerment, ethics, fear, grief, healing, interconnection & belonging, kindness & compassion, love, non-conforming, paradigm shift, political, power and powerlessness, sadness & pain, shadow, transformation, trauma, violence | Tagged Abhi Ryan, acting out hate, acute trauma, addiction, affordable counselling exeter, age of possibility, alienation, all in this together, alternative, animating force, assigning fault, authenticity, backlash, belittling, bigotry, blame model, blame narrative, blame the racists, blaming, broken society, broken system, brokenness, call of hate, call to action, caricatures of evil, Charles Eisenstein, childhood freedom, civil disobedience, civil disorder, climate change, closing overseas military bases, collapse of containing systems, collapse of dominant institutions, compassion, compassionate inquiry, concentration camps, connection with nature, consciousness shift, constructed reality, containing systems, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creative engagement, criminal punishment, cultural collapse, cultural constructs, cultural deterioration, cultural institutions, cultural self harm, culture defining story, custodians of the story, cynicism, DAPL, dark side, deep community, deep state, dehumanising, dehumanization, dehumanizing, dehumanizing ideology, deplorables, depression, derision, disconnection, disintegration, displaced anger, disputing the blame narrative, dissolution of old order, Donald Trump, Donald Trump’s appeal, dying paradigm, dying story, ecocidal system, ecocide, ecological crisis, ecological deterioration, economic crisis, elite policy consensus, empathy, empowering, empowerment, engagement, entrenched systems, environmental crisis, environmental deterioration, environmental harm, essence of racism, evangelizing compassion, existential meaning, false progress, faux progressive feminism, fragmentation, free trade ideology, global finance capital, good evil demarcation, growth imperative, hate and blame, hate and pain, hate as bodyguard for grief, hate vortex, holistic, human degradation, identifying fault, imperative of growth, imperative of progress, imperial wars, injustice, intensifying disorder, interbeing, intimate connection with nature, Islamophobia, Kelly Brogan, kingdom of childhood, labelling, lashing out, letting go of illusions, LGBTQ rights, liberal media, living in a bubble, lost normality, love and fear, low cost counselling exeter, making meaning, marginal practices, marginal structures, meditation, military confrontation, military industrial complex, mirror image, misogyny, motivating emotions, neocon, neoliberal economics, new paradigm, new story, normality, nuclear weapons expansion, objectifying, old paradigm, old story, one earth, one people, one tribe, oppressive system, othering, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, Pancho Ramos Stierle, paradigm shift, passivity, person centred counselling exeter, poison pill, political hate, political ideology, political uncertainty, prayers, preconditions for war, prison industrial complex, privilege, privileged classes, programming ideologies, propaganda, racism, regenerative, repudiation of elite, repudiation of establishment, resource extraction, restorative, restorative justice, rewriting political vocabulary, roots of racism, Sarah Fields, self harming, sense of betrayal, sexism, shibboleths, shift in consciousness, social change, social conservatism, social constructs, social harm, solidarity, sourcing from empathy, space between stories, spiritual retreats, surveillance state, sweetening the pill, time of uncertainty, totalitarian, trauma responses, true unknowing, unconditional love, unknowing, us and them, us versus them, victim blaming, water protectors, when normal falls apart, white privilege, world dominating machine, world falling apart, wound of separation, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Leonard Cohen – The Sound of Silence

Posted on November 13, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

This is astonishing. His words keep sounding long after he has finished speaking. Tenderness and beauty. Palace Gate Counselling Service, Exeter Counselling Exeter since 1994

Posted in beauty, creativity, Disconnection, fear, Leonard Cohen, loss, love, poetry, presence, shadow | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, alienation, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, disconnection, Leonard Cohen, low cost counselling exeter, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, Paul Simon, person centred counselling exeter, shadow, Sound of Silence, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

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