Tag Archives: conforming

Rupi Kaur on confusing anger and kindness

Posted on April 30, 2018 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

“Every time you tell your daughter you yell at her out of love you teach her to confuse anger with kindness which seems like a good idea till she grows up to trust men who hurt her cause they look … Continue reading →

Posted in anger, boundaries, child development, communication, cultural questions, family systems, feminine, growing up, kindness & compassion, love, parenting, perception, relationship, trust, vulnerability | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, boundaries, compliance, conditions of worth, conforming, confusing anger and kindness, congruence, conscious parenting, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creating boundaries, empowerment, expressing yourself, feminism, internal locus, low cost counselling exeter, misplaced trust, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, parenting and anger, parenting and boundaries, people pleasing, person centred counselling exeter, raising children, realness, rupi kaur, seeking approval, self concept, self esteem, self-determination, self-structure, shouting at children, trust, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

‘Giving up alcohol opened my eyes to the infuriating truth about why women drink’ Kristi Coulter

Posted on July 4, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Giving up alcohol opened my eyes to the infuriating truth about why women drink Click on the above link to visit Quartz Media’s site, for Kristi’s great piece about women, alcohol and our culture. This is from a U.S. perspective … Continue reading →

Posted in abuse, acceptance, advertising, anger, autonomy, awakening, boundaries, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, consciousness, cultural questions, dependence, Disconnection, embodiment, equality, external locus, feminine, Gender & culture, gender identity, guilt, identity, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, mindfulness, non-conforming, objectification, organismic experiencing, perception, physical being, political, power and powerlessness, presence, reality, sadness & pain, self, self concept, self esteem, shadow, shame, shaming, trust | Tagged acceptance, accepting the unacceptable, addiction, addictive behaviour, affordable counselling exeter, altering natural responses, anger as energy, avoiding change, beer yoga, being a woman, being everything, being ignored, being interrupted, being shamed, being underestimated, being undermined, being who you are, belonging, body consciousness, body image, camouflage, compulsion, compulsive behaviour, conditioning, conditions of worth, conforming, conformity, conscious living, consciousness, controlling women’s bodies, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, cultural conditioning, cultural disembodiment, cultural pathology, cultural sickness, cultural trauma, dealing with bigotry, dealing with discrimination, dealing with prejudice, disconnecting, disconnecting from emotion, disconnecting from experiencing, disconnecting from feelings, disconnection, disembodied, displacement behaviour, dissociating, doing everything, drink as signifier, drivers, enjoying, enjoyment, equality, escaping reality, experiencing bigotry, experiencing discrimination, experiencing prejudice, facing reality, fairness, faking it, feminine conditioning, feminine role models, feminism, finding enjoyment, finding well being, First World Problems, First World woman, free time, gender oppression, gender privilege, generating well being, intolerable reality, invisibility, it’s not fair, Jiddu Krishnamurti, judginess, judging others, lack of equality, low cost counselling exeter, mansplaining, maternity leave, Matrix, micro aggressions, mindful savoring, mindful savouring, mindfulness, minimising, minimizing, misogyny, need for a drink, needing a drink, no acceptable way to be a woman, no easy way to be a woman, non conforming, non conformity, not knowing, numbing, numbing natural responses, objectification, objectifying, oppression, organismic, overriding yourself, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, paradigm shift, patriarchal attitudes, patriarchal oppression, patriarchy, peer pressure, perfection driver, perfectionism, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, Planned Parenthood, purpose of anger, sacred feminine, scarcity of role models, self acceptance, self care, self hatred, self love, self medicating, self rejection, self soothing, self trust, self-loathing, shame, shaming, shaming women, shrinking from reality, sick culture, sick society, sobriety, softening reality, softening the edges, supporting mothers, supporting women, systemic depletion, systemic exhaustion, telling women to smile, toughness, trusting natural responses, trusting who you are, trusting yourself, trying driver, using anger, Vinyasa & Vino, well-being, wetiko, Wetiko Capitalism, wetiko psychosis, Wetikonomy, women drinking, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Ten Meter Tower by Maximilien Van Aertryck & Axel Danielson

Posted on May 17, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://digg.com/video/ten-meter-tower-psychology-experiment Click on the above link to visit http://www.digg.com for this mesmerising and beautiful film from the New York Times – a little over 16 minutes – of people approaching the edge of a 10 metre diving board. There is … Continue reading →

Posted in autonomy, boundaries, communication, conditions of worth, cultural questions, embodiment, emotions, empathy, empowerment, external locus, fear, Gender & culture, gender identity, identity, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, non-conforming, perception, physical being, risk, self, self concept, shame, surrender, vulnerability | Tagged 10 meter tower, 10 metre tower, affordable counselling exeter, autonomy, Axel Danielson, being judged, boundaries, challenging experience, conditions of worth, conforming, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, difficult experience, encountering challenge, encountering fear, external locus, fear of being judged, fear of judgment, inner conflict, internal locus, listening to self, low cost counselling exeter, making difficult choices, Maximilien Van Aertryck, need for acceptance, need to belong, non conforming, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, saying no, saying yes, self concept, self-structure, sense of identity, shame, showing fear, surrender process, ten meter tower, ten metre tower, vulnerability, wanting to expand, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Why Ridiculous Official Propaganda Still Works – CJ Hopkins

Posted on January 15, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://www.counterpunch.org/2017/01/13/why-ridiculous-official-propaganda-still-works/ Click on the above link for this interesting article on http://www.counterpunch.org Hat tip to Charles Eisenstein for showing us this. We are going to go with the same excerpt Charles chose:- ‘The point is to draw a Maginot line, … Continue reading →

Posted in autonomy, Charles Eisenstein, communication, cultural questions, Disconnection, external locus, fear, internal locus of evaluation, perception, political, power and powerlessness, reality, scapegoating, self concept, self esteem, shadow, violence | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, allegiance, anxiety, authoritarian conditioning, authoritarianism, benefits of cooperating with the ruling classes, career advancement, Charles Eisenstein, Charles M. Blow, CJ Hopkins, coercive normality, compliance and control, conditioning, conforming, consensus reality, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, counter narrative, defensive ideology, delegitimising Donald Trump, delegitimizing Donald Trump, despotic societies, despotism, disdain for fact, disregard for fact, dissenting, dog and pony show, dominant narrative, emotional coercion, fake news, gainful employment, global capitalism, hidden despotism, humiliation, ideological boundaries, intelligence community, James R. Clapper, legitimising Donald Trump, legitimizing Donald Trump, low cost counselling exeter, manipulation of public opinion, media manipulation, mindlessness, nationalist backlash, neo-McCarthyite, neoliberalism, not conforming to the official narrative, official, official narrative, official propaganda, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, parroting the official narrative, person centred counselling exeter, pledging allegiance, politics of oppression, professional prestige, professional stigmatisation, professional stigmatization, propaganda, psychological conditioning, religious dogma, resistance to transnational capitalism, rewards of capitalism, rote obedience, ruling classes, ruling narrative, Russian hacking, social contract, social norms, social stigmatisation, social stigmatization, Stockholm Syndrome, Stockholm Syndrome model, swearing allegiance, totalitarianism, Trump golden showers, truth as defined by the ruling classes, Vermont power grid hacking, Withering Gaze, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Guante ‘Ten Responses to the Phrase ‘Man up”

Posted on December 6, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Click on the link above for Guante’s performance of his work on Button Poetry’s Facebook page. Aho. ‘Man up’ belongs in the ‘just don’t say it’ category…. Thanks, Guante, and also to Button Poetry and Angie Buchanan for posting this on Facebook … Continue reading →

Posted in communication, cultural questions, cultural taboos, Disconnection, diversity, emotions, empathy, empowerment, ethics, feminine, Gender & culture, growing up, healing, identity, kindness & compassion, loneliness, love, masculine, non-conforming, objectification, paradigm shift, parenting, perception, political, power and powerlessness, relationship, self, self concept, self esteem, sexual being, sexual orientation, sexual violence, shadow, shame, shaming, vulnerability | Tagged activism, affordable counselling exeter, alienation, antisocial behaviour, approval, authority, autonomy, belittling, belonging, binary, blame, body image, bullying, Button Poetry, challenge, child development, claiming personal power, coercive conformity, coercive culture, community, compassion, competition, conditions of worth for boys, conditions of worth for men, conforming, conformity, confrontation, connectedness, conscious living, consciousness, contempt, controlling behaviour, controlling culture, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creativity, cultural difference, cultural distortion, cultural diversity, culture of coercion, culture of control, culture of shame, cycles of shame, defensive, demonising maleness, demonising masculinity, demonizing maleness, demonizing masculinity, desensitization, destructive behaviour, developmental process, developmental trauma, disapproval, disconnection, discrimination, discrimination against men, displaced expression, distorted developmental process, distortions of masculine power, diversity, division, domination, educating boys, education, emotional awareness, emotional connection, emotional intelligence, emotional intelligence in men, emotions, empathy, empathy in boys, empathy in men, empowerment, essence of the masculine, exclusion, external authority, external locus, fear, gender, gender and culture, gender and emotion, gender bias, gender discrimination, gender prejudice, Guante, humiliation, individuated man, individuation, inner truth, inner voice, internal dialogue, internalised values, internalized values, introjections, judgement, kindness, Kyle Tran Myhre, loneliness, loss, low cost counselling exeter, man up, masculine, masculine energies, masculine intuition, masculine norms, masculine nurture, masculinity, men and emotion, misuse of power, non-conforming, nurture in men, objectification, oppression, oppressor, ostracism, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, paradigm shift, parenting, pathologising maleness, pathologising masculinity, pathologizing maleness, pathologizing masculinity, patriarchal behaviour, patriarchal culture, patriarchy, permission, person centred counselling exeter, personal discovery, personal journey, personal power, personal work, personhood, poetry as activism, political, projection, projective identification, projective reality, public shaming, punishment, punishment for not conforming, reclaiming the masculine, relationship, repression, ridicule, sacred feminine, sacred masculine, self concept, self distortion, self sufficiency, self suppression, self-structure, sensitivity, sensitivity as strength, separation, sexual diversity, sexual shaming, sexualisation of the masculine, sexualization of the masculine, shadow, shame, shaming, shaming as bloodsport, shaming men, shaming of maleness, social isolation, social pressure, stigma, stigmatising, stigmatizing, stoicism, subjective experience, suppression, unconscious behaviour, vulnerability, vulnerability as strength, wounded feminine, wounded masculine, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Elisabeth Kubler-Ross on living while we’re alive

Posted on October 21, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

“It is not the end of the physical body that should worry us. Rather, our concern must be to live while we’re alive – to release our inner selves from the spiritual death that comes with living behind a facade … Continue reading →

Posted in awakening, conditions of worth, consciousness, cultural questions, dying, Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, empowerment, external locus, fear, human condition, identity, internal locus of evaluation, meaning, non-conforming, organismic experiencing, physical being, presence, self, self concept, spirituality | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, aliveness, autonomy, awakening, conditions of worth, conforming, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, Elisabeth Kübler-Ross, Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, existential meaning, external authority, external locus, fear of death, fear of dying, fear of life, fear of living, inner authority, internal authority, internal locus, living fully, loss of self, low cost counselling exeter, meaning of life, mortality, non conforming, organismic, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, people pleasing, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, personhood, presence, pretending, purpose of life, seeking acceptance, seeking approval, self concept, self-structure, selfhood, spiritual death, trusting your experience, trusting yourself, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Rupi Kaur on being & expressing yourself

Posted on October 6, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

‘you tell me to quiet down cause my opinions make me less beautiful but i was not made with a fire in my belly so i could be put out i was not made with a lightness in my tongue … Continue reading →

Posted in autonomy, boundaries, conditions of worth, congruence, creativity, cultural questions, empowerment, equality, identity, internal locus of evaluation, non-conforming, objectification, organismic experiencing, poetry, political, power and powerlessness, resilience, rupi kaur, self, self concept | Tagged actualising, actualizing, affordable counselling exeter, authenticity, autonomy, boundaries, compliance, conditions of worth, conforming, congruence, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creating boundaries, empowerment, expressing yourself, feminism, fire in belly, freedom of speech, freedom of thought, holding boundaries, honouring your truth, internal locus, keeping boundaries, living your truth, low cost counselling exeter, non compliance, non conforming, objectification, organismic, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, people pleasing, person centred counselling exeter, realness, reclaiming power, reclaiming your power, reclaiming yourself, resilience, rupi kaur, seeking approval, self concept, self esteem, self expression, self-determination, self-structure, speaking your truth, true to self, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Charles Eisenstein on the New Story & Separation

Posted on September 4, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

‘Even though science as we know it is central to the centuries-long or millennia-long program to master nature, even though its approach to gathering knowledge is the very model of “othering” nature and making the world into an object, scientifically … Continue reading →

Posted in awakening, Charles Eisenstein, civil rights, compassion, cultural questions, Disconnection, ecological, ecological issues, education, embodiment, empowerment, ethics, external locus, growth, human condition, medical model, natural world, non-conforming, objectification, paradigm shift, political, power and powerlessness, teaching, transformation | Tagged achievement, activism, affordable counselling exeter, alienating systems, alienation, authority, awakening, body as a thing, body as an object, capitalism, change, changing the system from within, Charles Eisenstein, classism, colonialism, commodity economy, community, competitive, compliance, conformance, conforming, conformity, connection, consciousness, control, controlling, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, dependency, dependency on experts, disease model, disembodiment, disorder model, dominating civilization, domination, embodied experience, embodiment, external locus, industrial food system, intelligence, interbeing, interconnectedness, interconnection, interdependence, lost connections, low cost counselling exeter, materialism, medical model, modern medicine, mythology of separation, nature of reality, normalcy, normalisation, normalization, obedience, objectification, objectifying, othering, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, paradigm shift, passivity, person centred counselling exeter, purpose, racism, reality, reductionism, sacred activism, SATs, separate self, separation, sexism, standardisation, standardised schooling, standardization, standardized schooling, story, Story of Separation, theory of change, tolerance to tedium, web of life, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Belonging: Be the Longing – Toko-pa

Posted on March 28, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Click on the link at the end of this piece for Toko-pa’s wonderful post. ‘The ache to belong in friendship and community can be so pervasive that it colours everything we do.‘ The writer stumbled across these words yesterday, and … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, actualizing tendency, beauty, consciousness, core conditions, creativity, cultural questions, Disconnection, fear, friendship, grief, identity, immanence, interconnection & belonging, John O'Donohue, kindness & compassion, loneliness, loss, love, meaning, non-conforming, perception, presence, relationship, sadness & pain, self, spirituality, surrender, Toko-pa, transformation, trust, vulnerability | Tagged absence, ache to belong, actualising and belonging, actualizing and belonging, adrift, affordable counselling exeter, alienation, ambiguity, ancestors, Be The Longing, beauty, being seen, belonging, calling homeward, caretaking, certainty, community, compliance, conforming, consciousness, context, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creativity, diminishing ourselves, disconnection, dreamspeak, enlarging our lives, ethic of service, existential meaning, expansion, fear, finding our tribe, fitting in, fog of modernity, Francis Weller, friendship, gathering, generosity, giving, grief, heart's longing, humility, hungry ghosts, individuating and belonging, individuation, interconnectedness, interconnection, isolation, John O'Donohue, joining established groups, joining groups, kindness, Llama Surya Das, loneliness, longing, longing for community, low cost counselling exeter, Max Ginsburg, meaningful life, need for tribe, need to belong, non conformity, non-conforming, offering, orphan, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, paradox, person centred counselling exeter, presence, recognition, resilience, responsibility, ritual, Soul Activist, spiritual practice, spirituality, stewardship, suppressing own being, suppressing self, the responsible one, Toko-pa, tribe, unmet longing, validation, vulnerability, wanting to belong, What about me?, wisdom, writing, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk, yearning to belong | Leave a comment

Erich Fromm on the situation of a sane man in an insane culture

Posted on February 4, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

“A person who has not been completely alienated, who has remained sensitive and able to feel, who has not lost the sense of dignity, who is not yet “for sale”, who can still suffer over the suffering of others, who … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', actualizing tendency, awakening, conditions of worth, conflict, consciousness, cultural questions, Disconnection, emotions, Eric Fromm, ethics, fear, grief, growth, human condition, identity, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, loneliness, non-conforming, organismic experiencing, paradigm shift, perception, political, reality, sadness & pain, self concept, shadow, transformation, trauma, trust, violence, vulnerability | Tagged actualising, actualizing, affordable counselling exeter, alienation, autonomy, coercive conformity, collective shadow, community, compassion, conforming, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, cultural insanity, cultural norms, cultural paradigm, cultural shadow, cultural values, disconnection, empathy, Erich Fromm, ethic of service, existential meaning, grief for world, grieving process, insane culture, integrating cultural trauma, integrating trauma, isolation, Jiddu Krishnamurti, Joanna Macy, low cost counselling exeter, neurosis, non-conforming, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, personal grief, sacredness of life, self respect, sensitivity, shadow, sick culture, sick society, social isolation, social norms, toxic culture, toxic society, trauma, Work that Reconnects, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

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