Tag Archives: loneliness

Mark Nepo on presence and directness

Posted on October 10, 2019 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

“We waste so much energy trying to cover up who we are when beneath every attitude is the want to be loved, and beneath every anger is a wound to be healed and beneath every sadness is the fear that … Continue reading →

Posted in awakening, congruence, consciousness, Disconnection, encounter, fear, loneliness, Mark Nepo, meaning, mindfulness, organismic experiencing, presence, touch, vulnerability | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, aliveness, allowing life to touch us, Book of Awakening, congruence, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, disconnection, encounter, feeling real, hiding and pretending, hiding from life, hiding who you are, holiness, immanence, lack of presence, loneliness, low cost counselling exeter, Mark Nepo, meaning in life, muffled life, nothing feels real, open heartedness, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, presence and aliveness, realness, sacredness, transience, vulnerability, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

What about when meditation doesn’t help with anxiety?

Posted on March 10, 2018 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://www.nondualtherapy.life/2018/01/28/q-what-about-when-meditation-doesnt-help-with-anxiety/ Click on the above link to visit http://www.nondualtherapy.life for this helpful response to a reader’s question. Our experience is that very often people’s understanding of what meditation or mindfulness offers, is distorted and misses the heart of the practice … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, awakening, conflict, consciousness, cultural questions, Disconnection, embodiment, emotions, empowerment, fear, identity, interconnection & belonging, loneliness, meditation, mindfulness, movement meditation, perception, power and powerlessness, presence, self, self concept, spirituality, surrender, transformation, trauma, trust, vulnerability | Tagged abandoning ourselves, accepting, affordable counselling exeter, alienation, aliveness, allowing experience, allowing fear, anxiety, anxiety attacks, awakening, bargaining, being with fear, being with vulnerability, busy mind, catalyst of awakening, collective consciousness, conditional mind, connectedness, connection, conscious movement, contraction, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, dance meditation, denial, denial of fear, denying emotion, denying experience, denying feelings, disconnection, dissolving conflict, ego mind, escaping suffering, evolving consciousness, existential isolation, existential loneliness, expanding consciousness, expansion, experiencing life, fear and resistance, fear as sensitivity, finding peace, finding release, finding rest, get rid of, grounding yourself, human suffering, individual suffering, inherited trauma, interbeing, interconnectedness, interdependence, intrusive thoughts, is meditation safe, is mindfulness safe, isolation, letting go, loneliness, low cost counselling exeter, meditation, meeting yourself, mental freedom, mindfulness, movement meditation, negating experience, Nondual Quality, Nondual Therapy, not identifying with stories, oneness, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, panic attacks, person centred counselling exeter, personal suffering, powerlessness, radical acceptance, rejecting fear, rejecting ourselves, rejecting suffering, repressing anxiety, repressing emotion, repressing feelings, repression and denial, seeking control, separate self, separation, separation mindset, sitting with fear, sitting with vulnerability, space of limitation, straw into gold, stress in the psyche, suffering and resistance, suffering of the whole, thinking mind, transformation, transformative change, transmutation, trauma, troubling thoughts, vulnerability, war against suffering, web of life, wholeness, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Your True Home – John O’Donohue

Posted on January 30, 2018 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Click on the above link to visit John O’Donohue’s page on Facebook for this beautiful meditation. We are struck that his conclusion is the same as Carl Rogers – when we are able to come home to ourselves and be … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, actualizing tendency, autonomy, awakening, community, congruence, consciousness, core conditions, creativity, cultural questions, Disconnection, embodiment, emotions, identity, immanence, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, John O'Donohue, loneliness, meaning, meditation, person centred, person centred theory, photographs & pictures, presence, reality, relationship, self, self concept, spirituality, surrender, transformation, vulnerability | Tagged acceptance, actualising, actualizing, affordable counselling exeter, alienation, alone in the world, aloneness, awakening, beauty, belonging, bleakness, breaking the spell, coming home to yourself, connectedness, connecting, core conditions, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creative connection, disconnection, emptiness, Eternal Echoes, existential aloneness, existential loneliness, external locus, facing aloneness, false belonging, finding inner rest, finding your inner rhythm, finding your true home, finding yourself, fragmentation, house of your heart, immanence, individuating, inhabiting aloneness, inner knowing, interconnection, interdependence, internal locus, John O'Donohue, learning to listen, listening imagination, loneliness, longing, losing yourself, loving life, low cost counselling exeter, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, prayer, presence, sacredness, seeking affirmation, seeking distraction, self acceptance, self concept, self love, self-structure, sense of the sacred, soul voice, source, spirituality, surrender, Thomas a Kempis, transformative change, transition times, true belonging, trusting your inner wisdom, trusting yourself, valuing life, veils of illusion, voice crying in the wilderness, voice of the soul, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

What Chester Bennington’s death tells us about mental health awareness

Posted on July 23, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

https://doctorgoatblog.wordpress.com/2017/07/22/what-chester-benningtons-death-tells-us-about-mental-health-awareness/ Click on the link above for this wise, heartful post by an anonymous blogger who identifies as Dr Goat. This expresses much of how we make sense of human distress at this service. There is (for example) no evidence … Continue reading →

Posted in anti-depressants, anti-psychotics, borderline personality disorder, CBT, childhood abuse, community, cultural questions, cultural taboos, diagnoses of bipolar, Disconnection, DSM, emotions, empowerment, ethics, external locus, healing, hearing voices, interconnection & belonging, medical model, non-directive counselling, Palace Gate Counselling Service, paradigm shift, perception, political, psychiatric abuse, psychiatric drugs, psychiatry, psychosis, relationship, sadness & pain, schizophrenia, self concept, self esteem, shame, shaming, therapeutic growth, therapeutic relationship, trauma, values & principles, violence, vulnerability, working with clients | Tagged 1 in 4, accessing support, accumulated distress, ACES, addiction, addressing past trauma, Adverse Childhood Exeperiences, adverse circumstances, adverse events, affordable counselling exeter, anxiety, anxiety and depression, art and trauma, being functional, bereaved by suicide, Big Phama, biomedical intervention, biomedical reductionism, building community, bullying, CBT, CBT as temporary fix, changing behaviour without addressing causes, chemical imbalance theory, Chester Bennington, childhood trauma, cognitive behavioural therapy, collective responsibility to each other, continuing adversity, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, coward’s way out, cuts to health and social care, dealing with abuse, dealing with neglect, dealing with violence, death by suicide, depression, depression as brain disorder, depression as disease, depression as illness, do mental health problems go away, DSM5, economic productivity as measure of worth, effect of bereavement, effect of trauma on health, effect of trauma on well being, emotional states, empathy, enhancing community, enhancing mental health, enhancing relationship, enhancing well being, equating medical with valid, expanded diagnostic criteria, expanding diagnostic criteria, expressing grief, expressing sadness, expressing sorrow, feeling ashamed, feeling embarrassed, feeling shame, fight flight freeze, grief process, grieving process, impact of bereavement, impact of trauma, impact of traumatic experience, individual pathology, interbeing, interconnection, interdependence, invalidating distress, judgemental, Linkin Park, loneliness, long term recovery, low cost counselling exeter, manifestations of mental distress, medical pathology, medical validation of distress, medicalisation of distress, medicalisation of emotion, medicalisation of feeling, medicalisation of human experience, medicalisation of sadness, medicalization of distress, medicalization of emotion, medicalization of feeling, medicalization of human experience, medicalization of sadness, mental distress, mental health awareness, mental health problems, mental health recovery, mental health stigma, mental health support, natural human reactions, need for recovery time, need for rest, need for time to adjust, normal emotions, not functioning, ongoing adversity, over medicalisation, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, parity of esteem, past trauma, person centred counselling exeter, person’s context, post traumatic stress, promoting mental health, promoting well being, psychiatric reductionism, public grief, pull yourself together, reactions to suicide, reductionism in biomedical model, relationship breakdown, relationship failure, responding to distress, sexual abuse, shame, social causes of mental distress, social causes of mental health problems, suicide is selfish, suicide narrative, underlying issues, understanding mental health, unresolved distress, vulnerability, whole person, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | 1 Comment

The Loneliness of Donald Trump – Rebecca Solnit

Posted on June 29, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://lithub.com/rebecca-solnit-the-loneliness-of-donald-trump/ Click on the link above to visit http://www.lithub.com for this perceptive and sad piece by Rebecca. ““They were careless people,” F. Scott Fitzgerald wrote of the rich couple at the heart of The Great Gatsby. “They smashed up things and … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', accountability, boundaries, bullying, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, consciousness, cultural questions, Disconnection, empathy, equality, ethics, identity, interconnection & belonging, loneliness, meaning, metaphor & dream, objectification, person centred, political, power, power and powerlessness, reality, self, self concept, shadow, shame, shaming, trauma | Tagged A New York City Atlas, absolute power, addictive behaviour, affordable counselling exeter, alternative facts, always wanting more, American buffoon, awareness, awareness of oneself in relation to others, awareness of others, be careful what you wish for, being closed to others, being mocked, belonging, breaking things, bully of fact, bullying, butt of jokes, calling to account, collective shadow, compulsion, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, consciousness, consumer society, consumerism, cooperative relationship, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, covfefe, craving, cultural shadow, democracy of mind and heart, democracy of social discourse, derision, destructive pride, distorted reality, distorted sense of self, Donald Trump, Dorian Gray, echo chamber, ego mind, egomaniacs, enduring challenge, enduring contradiction, equality, equality keeps us honest, everyone is important, existential meaning, expanding awareness, experiencing mockery, experiencing shame, F Scott Fitzgerald, fake university, feeding the beast, feeling worthless, Fisherman's Wife, flattery, fortune’s fool, free press, gaining awareness, grasp exceeding understanding, graven image, hall of mirrors, Hannah Arendt, harming others, hedonism, hubris, hungry ghost, image building, importance of boundaries, importance of consequences, importance of limits, indulgence, inner dialogue, inner ethical compass, insatiable greed, interbeing, internal ethical system, inward ethical system, isolation, it’s not about you, Karma, karmic balance, Krista Tippet, lack of awareness, loneliness, lonely at the top, low cost counselling exeter, Lyndsey Stonebridge, making demands, materialism, meaninglessness, Midas touch, mirroring, moral world, narcissists, need for flattery, nemesis, no concept of otherness, no concept of others, Nonstop Metropolis, objectification, objectifying, Occupy Wall Street, On Being, On the Origins of Totalitarianism, overreach, overreaching, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, peer feedback, person centred counselling exeter, personal shadow, power and glory, power and prominence, power corrupts, powerlessness, powerlessness and inauthenticity, powerlessness and pretence, pretending, privilege, privilege and oblivion, privilege and obliviousness, Pushkin, Rebecca Solnit, reductionism, reflecting mirror, relational responsibility, reputational damage, responsibility to other, retribution, rule of law, self concept, self destruction, self harming, self hatred, self imposed isolation, self protection, self reflection, self-destructive behaviour, self-loathing, self-responsibility, self-structure, sense of self, shadow, shaming, slow suicide, social responsibility, sociopaths, solipsism, subordinating the system of government, suppressing evidence, the banality of evil, The Fisherman and the Golden Fish, The Great Gatsby, The Mother of All Questions, the void, trauma, tyranny, vast carelessness, wanting to have your own way, willingness, worthlessness, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Laura Delano on Feeling your feelings, empathy, compassion – & the shrink

Posted on June 2, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Click on the above link to visit Laura’s Facebook page, for this moving, accurate, important post. We work outside the ‘mental health’/psychiatric system and terminology here. We choose our therapists for their willingness to do their own work and their … Continue reading →

Posted in abuse, acceptance, actualizing tendency, autonomy, awakening, civil rights, client as 'expert', clients' perspective, compassion, consent, core conditions, cultural questions, Disconnection, DSM, emotions, empathy, equality, ethics, fear, grief, growth, healing, identity, immanence, interconnection & belonging, kindness & compassion, Laura Delano, medical model, non-conforming, non-directive counselling, organismic experiencing, Palace Gate Counselling Service, perception, person centred, power and powerlessness, presence, psychiatric abuse, psychiatric drugs, psychiatry, resilience, sadness & pain, self, self concept, self esteem, shadow, therapeutic growth, therapeutic relationship, transformation, trauma, trust, values & principles, violence, vulnerability, working with clients | Tagged abuse, affordable counselling exeter, alienation, aliveness, authentic being, authenticity, awareness, belonging, big feelings, biomedical model, biomedical reductionism, blaming, carrying collective shadow, carrying shadow for others, coercive conformity, coercive drug treatment, coercive psychiatric treatment, collective shadow, compassion based relating, compassionate encounter, conditions of worth, conformity, connecting in relationship, core conditions, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, crying frequently, cultural shadow, desecration, discrimination, disease and disorder model, embodied wisdom, embodiment, emotional awareness, emotional connection, emotions as wisdom, encounter, existential meaning, expanding awareness, experiencing anger, experiencing despair, experiencing grief, experiencing joy, external locus, fear, fear as motivating emotion, fear based behaviour, fear based paradigm, fear of self, fear of your own power, grieving process, holding sacred space, immanence, insecurity, intense emotion, intense emotional states, interbeing, interconnectedness, interconnection, intolerance, labelling people, lack of awareness, Laura Delano, loneliness, low cost counselling exeter, meaning, medical model, medical reductionism, medicalisation of distress, medicalization of distress, mental health labelling, mental illness, mirroring, modelling compassion, modelling love based relationship, modelling ways of being, mourning process, mystification, neglect, non-conforming, nothing is wrong with you, oppression, organismic experiencing, othering, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, pathologising distress, pathologising emotion, pathologising feeling, pathologizing distress, pathologizing emotion, pathologizing feeling, patriarchy, person centred counselling exeter, person centred relationship, personal shadow, power, power imbalance, power of being seen, power of crying, power of surrender, power of vulnerability, powerlessness, presence, psychiatric disempowerment, psychiatric drugs, psychiatric labeling, psychiatric labelling, psychiatric model, psychiatric reductionism, reclaiming your power, recovering from psychiatry, reductionism in biomedical model, reductionism in psychiatry, relational communication, relational connection, relational presence, relationship, relationship heals, sacred expression, sacred space, sacredness of feelings, scapegoating, scientific reductionism, self concept, self-structure, shame, shyness, social control, social isolation, therapeutic process, therapeutic relationship, too emotional, trauma, unresolved trauma, violence, wounded healer, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Guante ‘Ten Responses to the Phrase ‘Man up”

Posted on December 6, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Click on the link above for Guante’s performance of his work on Button Poetry’s Facebook page. Aho. ‘Man up’ belongs in the ‘just don’t say it’ category…. Thanks, Guante, and also to Button Poetry and Angie Buchanan for posting this on Facebook … Continue reading →

Posted in communication, cultural questions, cultural taboos, Disconnection, diversity, emotions, empathy, empowerment, ethics, feminine, Gender & culture, growing up, healing, identity, kindness & compassion, loneliness, love, masculine, non-conforming, objectification, paradigm shift, parenting, perception, political, power and powerlessness, relationship, self, self concept, self esteem, sexual being, sexual orientation, sexual violence, shadow, shame, shaming, vulnerability | Tagged activism, affordable counselling exeter, alienation, antisocial behaviour, approval, authority, autonomy, belittling, belonging, binary, blame, body image, bullying, Button Poetry, challenge, child development, claiming personal power, coercive conformity, coercive culture, community, compassion, competition, conditions of worth for boys, conditions of worth for men, conforming, conformity, confrontation, connectedness, conscious living, consciousness, contempt, controlling behaviour, controlling culture, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creativity, cultural difference, cultural distortion, cultural diversity, culture of coercion, culture of control, culture of shame, cycles of shame, defensive, demonising maleness, demonising masculinity, demonizing maleness, demonizing masculinity, desensitization, destructive behaviour, developmental process, developmental trauma, disapproval, disconnection, discrimination, discrimination against men, displaced expression, distorted developmental process, distortions of masculine power, diversity, division, domination, educating boys, education, emotional awareness, emotional connection, emotional intelligence, emotional intelligence in men, emotions, empathy, empathy in boys, empathy in men, empowerment, essence of the masculine, exclusion, external authority, external locus, fear, gender, gender and culture, gender and emotion, gender bias, gender discrimination, gender prejudice, Guante, humiliation, individuated man, individuation, inner truth, inner voice, internal dialogue, internalised values, internalized values, introjections, judgement, kindness, Kyle Tran Myhre, loneliness, loss, low cost counselling exeter, man up, masculine, masculine energies, masculine intuition, masculine norms, masculine nurture, masculinity, men and emotion, misuse of power, non-conforming, nurture in men, objectification, oppression, oppressor, ostracism, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, paradigm shift, parenting, pathologising maleness, pathologising masculinity, pathologizing maleness, pathologizing masculinity, patriarchal behaviour, patriarchal culture, patriarchy, permission, person centred counselling exeter, personal discovery, personal journey, personal power, personal work, personhood, poetry as activism, political, projection, projective identification, projective reality, public shaming, punishment, punishment for not conforming, reclaiming the masculine, relationship, repression, ridicule, sacred feminine, sacred masculine, self concept, self distortion, self sufficiency, self suppression, self-structure, sensitivity, sensitivity as strength, separation, sexual diversity, sexual shaming, sexualisation of the masculine, sexualization of the masculine, shadow, shame, shaming, shaming as bloodsport, shaming men, shaming of maleness, social isolation, social pressure, stigma, stigmatising, stigmatizing, stoicism, subjective experience, suppression, unconscious behaviour, vulnerability, vulnerability as strength, wounded feminine, wounded masculine, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

The Crowdless Man – Michael Leunig

Posted on October 4, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

The Crowdless Man See him wandering alone, The crowdless man, He has no group, He has no tribe, He carries his identity in his pocket. His pocket has a hole in it, His story has a hole in it, His … Continue reading →

Posted in autonomy, cultural questions, identity, loneliness, Michael Leunig, non-conforming, poetry, power and powerlessness, presence, sadness & pain, scapegoating, self | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, aloneness, autonomy, being an outsider, belonging, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, Crowdless Man, cultural outsider, discipline of solitude, exclusion, finding a tribe, loneliness, low cost counselling exeter, Michael Leunig, non conforming, not belonging, outsider story, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, practice of solitude, separation, solitude, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Toko-pa – The Sacred Descent

Posted on August 25, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

The Sacred Descent Click on the link to visit Toko-pa’s site for this brief reflection on allowing ourselves to drop down into our own darkness from a place of intention (rather than powerlessness):- ‘There in the underworld of grief, loss … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, awakening, compassion, conditions of worth, consciousness, core conditions, creativity, cultural questions, cultural taboos, encounter, grief, loss, love, meaning, metaphor & dream, power and powerlessness, presence, risk, sadness & pain, self, self concept, shadow, spirituality, surrender, Toko-pa, transformation, trust, vulnerability, working with clients | Tagged acknowledging darkness, acknowledging shadow, affordable counselling exeter, aliveness, awakening, being stuck, consciousness, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, counter intuitive, courting the mystery, creativity, darkness, depression, dream interpretation, dreaming, dreams, dreamwork, Enkel Dika, existential meaning, exploring your darkness, feeling stuck, going within, grief, grief and loss, grief process, honoring darkness, honoring shadow, honouring darkness, honouring shadow, importance of grieving, initiation, inner darkness, inner journey, intuition, inward journey, isolation, journey to the lower world, journey to the underworld, letting go, loneliness, looking within, low cost counselling exeter, meeting yourself, mystery, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, redemption, reflective process, sacred descent, sacredness, self awareness, self love, self reflection, sensitivity, shadow, shadow work, stuckness, suffering and redemption, surrender, tenderness, Toko-pa, transformation, wisdom, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk, yin | Leave a comment

Never Read the Comments – Liz Gilbert

Posted on June 2, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

” This feels personally relevant to the writer, who has her own experience of group attack, including via the internet, and (some) people’s willingness to make sweeping and vicious statements about other human beings they have never met, based on one … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', abuse, acceptance, anger, autonomy, blaming, boundaries, bullying, compassion, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, conflict, cultural questions, Disconnection, empathy, empowerment, external locus, internal locus of evaluation, kindness & compassion, objectification, perception, political, power and powerlessness, resilience, sadness & pain, scapegoating, self concept, self esteem, shadow, shaming, trauma, violence, vulnerability | Tagged abandoning self, abuse, acknowledgement, acknowledging, actualising, actualizing, affordable counselling exeter, anticipation, anxiety, armouring, authenticity, awfulising, awfulizing, being of service, being seen, belonging, betrayal, blame and shame model, Brené Brown, Buber, Buber I It, bullying, bystander apathy, caring what others think, catastrophising, catastrophizing, civil rights, clarity of values, closing down, closing your heart, communication, comparing self with others, comparison with others, compassion, conditions of worth, connectedness, connection, consent, consent to publication, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, courage, creativity, critics don't count, cruelty, culture of humiliation, cyber-bullying, de-armouring, dealing with criticism, dealing with haters, dealing with uncertainty, disconnection, Elizabeth Gilbert, embarrassment, empathy, ethic of service, ethics, exposure, facing judgement, fear, fear of humiliation, fear of unknown, feedback, freedom of expression, gainsayers, grief, grieving, handling criticism, handling uncertainty, harassment, Human Rights, humiliation, ideal self, innovation, inspiration, interconnectedness, interdependence, internet bullying, judgement, judgemental attitudes, Liz Gilbert, loneliness, loss, love and service, loving presence, low cost counselling exeter, meanness, minority influence, Monica Lewinsky, mortification, objectification, online bullying, online harassment, opening your heart, originality, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, perception, person centred counselling exeter, personal history, personal shifts, presence, public humiliation, public shaming, publication without consent, realness, receiving feedback, recontextualising experience, recontextualizing experience, resilience, scarcity mindset, Self, self abandonment, self armouring, self blame, self concept, self critical, self criticism, self discipline, self doubt, self esteem, self judgement, self protection, self worth, self-structure, service, service of the work, shame, shaming, showing up, shutting down, snapchat, spiritual discipline, staying open, suicide, sweaty creative, TED, the man in the arena, the unknown, Theodore Roosevelt, transformation, trauma, trolling, trust, unkindness, upstander, upstanding, value system, valuing yourself, vulnerability, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

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