Tag Archives: not good enough

Spinning Straw – Tracy Cochran

Posted on September 12, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

https://parabola.org/2017/07/30/spinning-straw-by-tracy-cochran/?utm_content=buffer9bcb5&utm_medium=social&utm_source=facebook.com&utm_campaign=buffer Click on the link above to visit the site for Parabola Magazine for this remarkable reworking of the Brothers Grimm. It is not long since we published a piece by Tracy – but the writer stumbled upon this at … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', abuse, acceptance, accountability, autonomy, beauty, blaming, boundaries, bullying, cognitive, compassion, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, consciousness, consent, core conditions, creativity, cultural questions, Disconnection, embodiment, emotions, empathy, empowerment, fear, feminine, good, gratitude, grief, growth, guilt, identity, interconnection & belonging, kindness & compassion, loneliness, loss, love, meaning, metaphor & dream, objectification, perception, power, power and powerlessness, relationship, resilience, sadness & pain, self, self concept, shadow, surrender, Tracy Cochran, transformation, vulnerability | Tagged abandonment, abuse of power, acceptance by the tribe, affordable counselling exeter, aliveness, aloneness, ancestors, armouring, Arthur Rackham, asking the impossible, autonomy, autonomy and acceptance, autonomy and belonging, bargaining, being in the shadows, being invisible, being left, being more, being unable to hold boundaries, betrayal, betraying love, betraying truth, betraying what you love, bitterness, boundaries, Brothers Grimm, causing harm, compassion, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, craving life, cut off from life, dare to be straw, deepest humanity, desecrated, desperation, diminishing ourselves, disconnection, divided, doing more, doing the math, ego mind, embodiment, empathy, emptiness, empty life, entitlement, everyone is special, everything is sacred, everything is special, evolutionary biology, existential emptiness, existential meaning, fairy tales, fear as a driver, fear of death, fear of loss, fear reaction, feeding people, feeling connected, feeling invisible, finding a place, finding balance, finding your reflection in another, folklore, fully alive, good enough, Great Mystery, guilt, having a place, having choice, heartfulness, here and now, holding yourself apart from love, holy work, how to live, humility, identity, inner smallness, internal division, invading boundaries, isolating behaviour, joy of connecting, joy of connection, keeping yourself alone, keeping yourself separate, knowing another, knowing each other, lacking choice, learning how to live, life is more precious than gold, listening without judgment, little rattle stilt, living experience, living fully, locating yourself, losing yourself, loss and grief, low cost counselling exeter, meeting needs indirectly, meeting needs obliquely, metamorphosis, metaphor, mind limitation, mind trap, mirror of another, mirror of love, mortality, myth, nameless, needing others, newborn, no such thing as magic, no-one is special, non possessive love, not good enough, not knowing yourself, not special, nothing is sacred, nothing is special, objectification, objectifying, ordinary and sacred, othering, otherworldly, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, power and powerlessness, power over, present moment, privilege, promises and betrayal, pure love, rage, reflection of love, relationship as transaction, remembering ourselves, resilience, responding and reacting, Rumplestiltskin, sacred love, sacredness, science and magic, science not magic, self acceptance, self armouring, self awareness, self betrayal, self concept, self denigration, self enclosed, self enclosure, self hate, self isolation, self knowledge, self limitation, self love, self rejection, self-structure, sense of sacred, shadow, small self, speaking unwisely, speaking wildly, spinning straw, spinning straw into gold, splitting, story-telling, stuckness, submissiveness, submitting, surrender, survival and acceptance, survival and belonging, telling tales, the first mother, The Heart of Oak Books, the wheel turned, the witness, Tracy Cochran, transformation, transience, trapped in your head, trying to explain, trying to save ourselves, trying to save yourself, turning wheel, unbounded love, unconditional love, using others, value of being alive, value of life, wanting approval, wanting closeness, wanting connection, wanting to be acceptable, wanting to be close, wanting to be known, wanting to be seen, wanting to belong, wanting to feel important, wanting to matter, wanting to please, web of life, what keeps us from love, wholesome work, without consent, without judgment, witnessing consciousness, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Gil Bailie on the Crucifixion & Blame

Posted on April 15, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

“The surest way to miss the link between the cure (the crucifixion and its aftereffects) and the disease (the structures of scapegoating violence upon which all human social arrangements have depended) is to read the passion story with an eye … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', accountability, awakening, blaming, bullying, civil rights, community, compassion, conditions of worth, conflict, congruence, core conditions, criminal justice model, cultural questions, Disconnection, empathy, ethics, external locus, fear, guilt, human condition, identity, interconnection & belonging, kindness & compassion, love, meaning, objectification, perception, person centred, person centred theory, political, power and powerlessness, presence, sadness & pain, scapegoating, self, self concept, self esteem, shadow, shame, shaming, spirituality, trauma, trust, violence | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, aggression of blame, blame, blame and responsibility, blaming, collective responsibility, collective scapegoating, collective shadow, commitment to self, compassion, conditional love, conditions of worth, connection, contempt of others, core beliefs, core conditions, core wounding, core wounds, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, cultural projection, cultural violence, empathic connection, empathic failure, empathy, encounter, expanding awareness, failure of empathy, finger pointing, Gil Bailie, hopelessness, human limitations, human needs, invalidation, inward enquiry, inwards enquiry, kindness, lack of validation, Lived Experience, loving kindness, low cost counselling exeter, low self esteem, meaning of evil, meaning of the crucifixion, need to be received, need to be seen, need to be witnessed, not good enough, open heart, own being, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, personal development, personal responsibility, personal shadow, phenomenological approach, presence, projecting, projecting shadow, projection, relationship, religious violence, sacred violence, scapegoating, self awareness, self blame, self care, self compassion, self concept, self contempt, self enquiry, self esteem, self expression, self judgement, self judgment, self perception, self worth, self-responsibility, self-structure, separation, shame, shaming, spirituality, suppressing need, suppressing self expression, trust, unlived life, unmet need, validation, validation of needs, Violence Unveiled, wholeness, withdrawal, witnessing, worth as a person, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Jason Hine on the curse, & blessing, of the Geis

Posted on February 27, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

This is an interesting post from Jason Hine, on the ‘Geis’ theme. It’s a ‘friends only’ Facebook post, which he has kindly given us permission to re-post. Jason links to an article on http://www.mythandmore.com – link right at the bottom of … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, awakening, consciousness, embodiment, empowerment, growth, healing, identity, Jason Hine, Joseph Campbell, Jung, meaning, metaphor & dream, perception, physical being, power and powerlessness, reality, self, self concept, shadow, spirituality, transformation | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, ancestral pain, awareness, becoming, becoming a person, belief systems, body awareness, breaking the curse, Carl Jung, conditions of worth, Conn-eda, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, destiny, embodiment, empowerment, enantiodromia, expanding awareness, fairytales, fate, fulfilment, Geis, good enough, Heinrich Zimmer. King and the Corpse, hero’s journey, integrating shadow, internalised experiences, Jason Hine, Joseph Campbell, low cost counselling exeter, metamorphosis, myth, mythology, not good enough, owning shadow, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, reconfiguring self, sacred, sacred calling, sacred obligation, self concept, self realisation, self realization, self-structure, shadow, storytelling, symbol, transformation, unhelpful belief systems, vocation, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Matt Licata on not allowing ‘spirituality’ to shame our needs

Posted on January 20, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

This is so important. The blame and shame model is always toxic, whether the more traditional style, or clad in New Age robes. We all feel, and we all need – it’s integral to the human experience. The helpful response is … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, actualizing tendency, awakening, blaming, bullying, compassion, conditions of worth, consciousness, core conditions, cultural questions, dependence, embodiment, emotions, empathy, empowerment, encounter, growth, human condition, immanence, kindness & compassion, love, Matt Licata, presence, reality, relationship, sadness & pain, self, self concept, self esteem, shame, shaming, spirituality, therapeutic growth, therapeutic relationship, touch, vulnerability | Tagged affection, affordable counselling exeter, aggression, aggression of blame, attachment, attunement, being met, being seen, beloved, blame, blaming, caregivers, commitment to self, compassion, completeness, conditional love, conditions of worth, connection, contact, core beliefs, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creativity, dependence, despair, disappointment, Elizabeth Gadd Photography, embodied experience, empathic connection, empathic failure, empathy, encounter, energy, enlightenment, expressing needs, failure of empathy, faith, family of origin, getting needs met in relationship, growth, having needs, hopelessness, human limitations, human needs, invalidation, kindness, lack of validation, Lizzy Gadd, longing, loving kindness, low cost counselling exeter, low self esteem, low vibration, manifestation, manifesting, Matt Licata, misunderstanding, need for affection, need for contact, need for love, need for touch, need to be heard, need to be received, need to be seen, need to be witnessed, neediness, New Age, new age fundamentalism, no self, not good enough, open heart, own being, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, personal growth, presence, relational animal, relational mammal, relationship, risk, self blame, self care, self compassion, self concept, self esteem, self expression, self judgement, self judgment, self perception, self worth, self-responsibility, self-structure, separation, shame, shaming, spiritual aggression, spiritual growth, spirituality, suppressing need, suppressing self expression, transcendence, trust, unlived life, unmet need, validation, validation of needs, wholeness, withdrawal, witnessing, worth as a person, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk, yearning | Leave a comment

The Hope Chest: The writing on the wall – Kim Johancen-Walt

Posted on March 31, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://ct.counseling.org/2015/03/the-hope-chest-the-writing-on-the-wall/ Interesting couple of case studies with Kim’s thoughts, from Counseling Today, a publication of The American Counseling Association. Palace Gate Counselling Service, Exeter

Posted in abuse, acceptance, actualizing tendency, anger, awakening, beauty, childhood abuse, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, conflict, core conditions, dependence, Disconnection, Eating, emotions, empowerment, encounter, external locus, family systems, fear, forgiveness, grief, growth, healing, identity, internal locus of evaluation, kindness & compassion, loss, love, meaning, perception, person centred, person centred theory, power and powerlessness, presence, relationship, sadness & pain, self, self concept, self esteem, suicide, surrender, therapeutic growth, therapeutic relationship, transformation, trauma, trust, violence, vulnerability, working with clients | Tagged abandonment, abuse, acceptance, achievement, acknowledgement, adverse childhood experience, affordable counselling exeter, alcohol abuse, American Counseling Association, approval, awareness, awareness and change, behaviour patterns, childhood physical abuse, childhood sexual abuse, childhood violent abuse, commitment in therapy, compassion, complex grief, complicated grief, conditions of worth, Counseling Today, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, cycles of abandonment, cycles of abuse, depression, despair, expectations in therapy, forgiveness, frustration, good enough, grief, growth, healing, hope, identity, Kim Johancen-Walt, letting go, limiting beliefs, loss, love, loving kindness, low cost counselling exeter, Maitri, meaning, minimizing feelings, natural healing process, not good enough, numbing, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, perfectionism, perpetuating abuse, perpetuating trauma, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, personal experience, personal identity, personal needs, powerlessness, recovery, relationship, self abandonment, self abuse, self concept, self criticism, self esteem, self harm, self medication, self punishment, self worth, self-injury, stuckness, stuckness in therapy, substance abuse, suicidal ideation, suicidal intention, suicidal thoughts, suicide, surrender, The Hope Chest, therapeutic growth, therapeutic process, therapeutic relationship, thought patterns, transformative change, trauma, unconditional positive regard, unresolved grief, UPR, victim identity, victim mentality, victim mindset, victimhood, withholding love, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment