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Tag Archives: meeting needs indirectly
Spinning Straw – Tracy Cochran
https://parabola.org/2017/07/30/spinning-straw-by-tracy-cochran/?utm_content=buffer9bcb5&utm_medium=social&utm_source=facebook.com&utm_campaign=buffer Click on the link above to visit the site for Parabola Magazine for this remarkable reworking of the Brothers Grimm. It is not long since we published a piece by Tracy – but the writer stumbled upon this at … Continue reading →
Posted in 'evil', abuse, acceptance, accountability, autonomy, beauty, blaming, boundaries, bullying, cognitive, compassion, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, consciousness, consent, core conditions, creativity, cultural questions, Disconnection, embodiment, emotions, empathy, empowerment, fear, feminine, good, gratitude, grief, growth, guilt, identity, interconnection & belonging, kindness & compassion, loneliness, loss, love, meaning, metaphor & dream, objectification, perception, power, power and powerlessness, relationship, resilience, sadness & pain, self, self concept, shadow, surrender, Tracy Cochran, transformation, vulnerability
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Tagged abandonment, abuse of power, acceptance by the tribe, affordable counselling exeter, aliveness, aloneness, ancestors, armouring, Arthur Rackham, asking the impossible, autonomy, autonomy and acceptance, autonomy and belonging, bargaining, being in the shadows, being invisible, being left, being more, being unable to hold boundaries, betrayal, betraying love, betraying truth, betraying what you love, bitterness, boundaries, Brothers Grimm, causing harm, compassion, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, craving life, cut off from life, dare to be straw, deepest humanity, desecrated, desperation, diminishing ourselves, disconnection, divided, doing more, doing the math, ego mind, embodiment, empathy, emptiness, empty life, entitlement, everyone is special, everything is sacred, everything is special, evolutionary biology, existential emptiness, existential meaning, fairy tales, fear as a driver, fear of death, fear of loss, fear reaction, feeding people, feeling connected, feeling invisible, finding a place, finding balance, finding your reflection in another, folklore, fully alive, good enough, Great Mystery, guilt, having a place, having choice, heartfulness, here and now, holding yourself apart from love, holy work, how to live, humility, identity, inner smallness, internal division, invading boundaries, isolating behaviour, joy of connecting, joy of connection, keeping yourself alone, keeping yourself separate, knowing another, knowing each other, lacking choice, learning how to live, life is more precious than gold, listening without judgment, little rattle stilt, living experience, living fully, locating yourself, losing yourself, loss and grief, low cost counselling exeter, meeting needs indirectly, meeting needs obliquely, metamorphosis, metaphor, mind limitation, mind trap, mirror of another, mirror of love, mortality, myth, nameless, needing others, newborn, no such thing as magic, no-one is special, non possessive love, not good enough, not knowing yourself, not special, nothing is sacred, nothing is special, objectification, objectifying, ordinary and sacred, othering, otherworldly, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, power and powerlessness, power over, present moment, privilege, promises and betrayal, pure love, rage, reflection of love, relationship as transaction, remembering ourselves, resilience, responding and reacting, Rumplestiltskin, sacred love, sacredness, science and magic, science not magic, self acceptance, self armouring, self awareness, self betrayal, self concept, self denigration, self enclosed, self enclosure, self hate, self isolation, self knowledge, self limitation, self love, self rejection, self-structure, sense of sacred, shadow, small self, speaking unwisely, speaking wildly, spinning straw, spinning straw into gold, splitting, story-telling, stuckness, submissiveness, submitting, surrender, survival and acceptance, survival and belonging, telling tales, the first mother, The Heart of Oak Books, the wheel turned, the witness, Tracy Cochran, transformation, transience, trapped in your head, trying to explain, trying to save ourselves, trying to save yourself, turning wheel, unbounded love, unconditional love, using others, value of being alive, value of life, wanting approval, wanting closeness, wanting connection, wanting to be acceptable, wanting to be close, wanting to be known, wanting to be seen, wanting to belong, wanting to feel important, wanting to matter, wanting to please, web of life, what keeps us from love, wholesome work, without consent, without judgment, witnessing consciousness, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk
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Person-centred Basics – Janet Tolan on Labels
The third in our occasional series of some person-centred fundamentals. ‘There are many ways of describing people who use services such as housing, education and health. Some of these are also used of counselling clients: this client is “manipulative”, that … Continue reading →
Posted in 'evil', abuse, accountability, actualizing tendency, blaming, Carl Rogers, compassion, conditions of worth, congruence, core conditions, cultural questions, Disconnection, diversity, empathy, encounter, ethics, external locus, fear, growth, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, Janet Tolan, love, meaning, non-conforming, non-directive counselling, objectification, organismic experiencing, perception, person centred, person centred theory, political, presence, psychiatry, reality, relationship, sadness & pain, shadow, shaming, therapeutic growth, therapeutic relationship, unconditional positive regard, values & principles, working with clients
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Tagged 19 Propositions, abusers, accountability, actualising, actualizing, affordable counselling exeter, attention-seeking, autonomy, awareness, beliefs in therapy, belonging, binary, blame culture, blaming, Carl Rogers, co dependence, coercive culture, compassion, condemnation, conformity, connectedness, connection, core conditions, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellor self awareness, counsellors Exeter, cultural coercion, cultural norms, cultural orthodoxy, cultural values, de-armouring, defensiveness, dependence, dependence in counselling, dependence in therapy, dependent client, dualistic, emotional landscape, empathic engagement, empathy, ethical tasks in therapy, ethics, fear, fear in counsellor, fear in therapist, goal-directed behaviour, gratitude, human needs, I it relationship, I Thou relationship, independent thinkers, independent thought, interconnectedness, interconnection, interdependence, internal frame of reference, internal locus, isolation, Janet Tolan, judgement in counselling, judgement in therapy, judgemental attitudes, labelling people, low cost counselling exeter, manipulative, Martin Buber, meeting needs indirectly, narcissist, narcissistic, neediness, needy client, Nineteen Propositions, non-conforming, objectifying, pain, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, PCA, perceived threat, perceptual field, perpetrators, person centered approach, person centred counselling exeter, person centred work with clients, person-centered, person-centred, person-centred approach, personal growth, personal landscape, personal therapy, personality theory, phenomenal field, projection, punishment, reality, responsibility, self concept, self-structure, shadow, shaming, Skills in Person-centred Counselling, social change, social conformity, social values, sociopath, survivors, therapeutic process, therapeutic relationship, therapist process, therapist self awareness, therapy training, toxic culture, trauma, us and them, victim blaming, victims, working with clients, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk
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When Children Lie – Patty Wipfler – Hand in Hand Parenting
http://www.handinhandparenting.org/article/when-children-lie/ This is a helpful site, and a helpful article, if you are looking to find effective ways to parent outside the culturally prevalent models of fault, blame and punishment. In the writer’s experience, most parents deeply want what is … Continue reading →
Posted in acceptance, accountability, anger, blaming, child development, communication, compassion, conditions of worth, conflict, consent, core conditions, cultural questions, dependence, Disconnection, emotions, empathy, encounter, equality, ethics, external locus, family systems, fear, generational trauma, growing up, Hand in Hand Parenting, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, kindness & compassion, love, parenting, power and powerlessness, relationship, self, self concept, self esteem, shame, shaming, teaching, trust, vulnerability
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Tagged affordable counselling exeter, anger, blame, boundaries, boundaries in parenting, closeness, coercive parenting, coercive relationship, cold shoulder, competition, competitiveness, conditions of worth, conscious parenting, consequences, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, dealing with tantrums, dependence, disapproval, discipline in parenting, disconnection, effect of competition on children, effect of competition on self esteem, emotional safety, emotional truths, empathy, excluding, exclusion, experimentation in parenting, external locus, fear, handling tantrums, hope, humiliating, humiliation, intimacy, judgemental parenting, learning in parenting, love, low cost counselling exeter, lying in children, meeting needs indirectly, motivation, my child lies, need for approval, need for attention, need for love, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, Patty Wipfler, perceived threat, person centered parenting, person centred counselling exeter, person centred parenting, person-centered, person-centred, positive attention, power imbalance, punishing, punishment, punishment as control, relational withdrawal, responsibility, safety, saying no, security, self concept, self esteem in children, shame, shaming, social lies, standards of truth, stay listening, staylistening, tantrums, threat, toxic culture, toxic shame, trust, truth telling, understanding, undivided attention, when children lie, withdrawal, www.handinhandparenting.org, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk
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