Tag Archives: loss

Guante ‘Ten Responses to the Phrase ‘Man up”

Posted on December 6, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Click on the link above for Guante’s performance of his work on Button Poetry’s Facebook page. Aho. ‘Man up’ belongs in the ‘just don’t say it’ category…. Thanks, Guante, and also to Button Poetry and Angie Buchanan for posting this on Facebook … Continue reading →

Posted in communication, cultural questions, cultural taboos, Disconnection, diversity, emotions, empathy, empowerment, ethics, feminine, Gender & culture, growing up, healing, identity, kindness & compassion, loneliness, love, masculine, non-conforming, objectification, paradigm shift, parenting, perception, political, power and powerlessness, relationship, self, self concept, self esteem, sexual being, sexual orientation, sexual violence, shadow, shame, shaming, vulnerability | Tagged activism, affordable counselling exeter, alienation, antisocial behaviour, approval, authority, autonomy, belittling, belonging, binary, blame, body image, bullying, Button Poetry, challenge, child development, claiming personal power, coercive conformity, coercive culture, community, compassion, competition, conditions of worth for boys, conditions of worth for men, conforming, conformity, confrontation, connectedness, conscious living, consciousness, contempt, controlling behaviour, controlling culture, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creativity, cultural difference, cultural distortion, cultural diversity, culture of coercion, culture of control, culture of shame, cycles of shame, defensive, demonising maleness, demonising masculinity, demonizing maleness, demonizing masculinity, desensitization, destructive behaviour, developmental process, developmental trauma, disapproval, disconnection, discrimination, discrimination against men, displaced expression, distorted developmental process, distortions of masculine power, diversity, division, domination, educating boys, education, emotional awareness, emotional connection, emotional intelligence, emotional intelligence in men, emotions, empathy, empathy in boys, empathy in men, empowerment, essence of the masculine, exclusion, external authority, external locus, fear, gender, gender and culture, gender and emotion, gender bias, gender discrimination, gender prejudice, Guante, humiliation, individuated man, individuation, inner truth, inner voice, internal dialogue, internalised values, internalized values, introjections, judgement, kindness, Kyle Tran Myhre, loneliness, loss, low cost counselling exeter, man up, masculine, masculine energies, masculine intuition, masculine norms, masculine nurture, masculinity, men and emotion, misuse of power, non-conforming, nurture in men, objectification, oppression, oppressor, ostracism, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, paradigm shift, parenting, pathologising maleness, pathologising masculinity, pathologizing maleness, pathologizing masculinity, patriarchal behaviour, patriarchal culture, patriarchy, permission, person centred counselling exeter, personal discovery, personal journey, personal power, personal work, personhood, poetry as activism, political, projection, projective identification, projective reality, public shaming, punishment, punishment for not conforming, reclaiming the masculine, relationship, repression, ridicule, sacred feminine, sacred masculine, self concept, self distortion, self sufficiency, self suppression, self-structure, sensitivity, sensitivity as strength, separation, sexual diversity, sexual shaming, sexualisation of the masculine, sexualization of the masculine, shadow, shame, shaming, shaming as bloodsport, shaming men, shaming of maleness, social isolation, social pressure, stigma, stigmatising, stigmatizing, stoicism, subjective experience, suppression, unconscious behaviour, vulnerability, vulnerability as strength, wounded feminine, wounded masculine, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Liz Gilbert on how to hold ourselves lovingly when life’s tough

Posted on August 8, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Click on the link for this Facebook post by Liz Gilbert (of ‘Eat, Pray, Love’ fame). We posted something from Liz not that long ago – and this feels important, so here is another… People who come to this service … Continue reading →

Posted in abuse, acceptance, blaming, compassion, conditions of worth, core conditions, cultural questions, Disconnection, Elizabeth Gilbert, emotions, empathy, empowerment, grief, growth, guilt, kindness & compassion, love, Palace Gate Counselling Service, presence, resilience, sadness & pain, self, self concept, self esteem, transformation, trauma, vulnerability, working with clients | Tagged acceptance, accountability, affordable counselling exeter, authenticity, awakening, beautiful freak, being broken, being emotional, being judgmental, being sensitive, being with difficult feeling, brokenness, causing pain to others, compassion, confusion, core conditions, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, dealing with crisis, dealing with divorce, dealing with loss, denial, deserving love, difficult emotion, difficult feeling, distortion, divorce, Elizabeth Gilbert, embarrassment, emotional endurance, empathy, family illness, feeling broken, feeling shame, forgiveness, grace, grief, grieving, haters, hating, hatred, human struggle, hurting others, kindness, kindness to self, Liz Gilbert, loss, love, low cost counselling exeter, low self esteem, managing crisis, maturing, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, practicing self love, radical self acceptance, radical self love, regret, remorse, repression, responding to crisis, self abuse, self acceptance, self attack, self awareness, self care, self compassion, self criticism, self degradation, self doubt, self empathy, self esteem, self hatred, self honesty, self love, self-responsibility, shame, strong emotion, suffering, tenderness, transformation, uncertainty, wishing you were different, withholding, withholding love, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

The Space Between Stories – Lissa Rankin

Posted on August 4, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

The Space Between Stories Click on the link for this beautiful, deep piece from Lissa. Here’s a taste:- “This week, I experienced a trauma that collapsed my story of self, yet a new story has not yet emerged. Charles Eisenstein … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, actualizing tendency, awakening, Charles Eisenstein, compassion, consciousness, core conditions, creativity, cultural questions, dying, emotions, empowerment, fear, flow, grief, growth, identity, immanence, interconnection & belonging, meaning, metaphor & dream, paradigm shift, perception, political, power and powerlessness, presence, reality, resilience, risk, sadness & pain, self, self concept, shadow, spirituality, surrender, sustainability, transformation, trauma, trust, vulnerability | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, allowing, awakening, awareness, being and doing, being lost, beloved, Brené Brown, Charles Eisenstein, childhood programming, closeness, collapse, communion, community, conditioning, conditions of worth, connection, consciousness shift, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creativity, cultural conditioning, death and rebirth, denial, dislocation, emerging paradigm, emerging stories, emerging story, emptiness, falling apart, finding roots, freedom, grace, grace that protects, grief, grieving, grounding, groundlessness, identity, immanence, inner growth, intimacy, inward growth, karmic ties, kindness, limiting beliefs, Lissa Rankin, loss, loss of security, loss of structure, lostness, low cost counselling exeter, maieusis, meditation, monkey mind, More Beautiful World Our Hearts Know Is Possible, new paradigm, not knowing, old ways, open heart, painfulness of growth, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, paradigm shift, person centred counselling exeter, personal growth, radical kindness, radical openness, rawness, re-storying, realness, regeneration, renewal, rest, restoration, restorying, rootlessness, sacred space, self doubt, sense of self, space between stories, spiritual growth, spirituality, stillness, story of self, structures of security, surrender, the void, transformation, transformative change, trauma, uncertainty, ungrounded, unguarded, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

EU Referendum: Time For Compassion & Ditch The Spiritual Bypass – Clare Josa

Posted on June 29, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://www.dancinginyoursoulshoes.com/eu-referendum-spiritual-bypass/ Click on the link for this important article by Clare about how – and how not to – respond to shock, fear, grief and loss in others and in yourself. It includes a film with Clare talking about how … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, anger, blaming, boundaries, bullying, communication, compassion, conflict, core conditions, cultural questions, Disconnection, empathy, ethics, fear, grief, identity, kindness & compassion, loss, organismic experiencing, perception, resilience, sadness & pain, scapegoating, self concept, shadow, shaming, values & principles, vulnerability | Tagged acceptance, affordable counselling exeter, aggression, alienation, authenticity, blaming, Bremain, Brexit, Clare Josa, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, denying emotion, denying feeling, difficult feeling, emotional process, empathy, EU referendum, fault and blame model, feeling your feelings, grief, grief stages, loss, low cost counselling exeter, making others wrong, organismic, othering, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, positivity, repressing feelings, scapegoating, self acceptance, self concept, self talk, self-structure, shadow, shaming, shock, spiritual bypass, stages of grief, suppressing feelings, Susannah Darling Khan, threat to identity, uncomfortable feeling, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Never Read the Comments – Liz Gilbert

Posted on June 2, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

” This feels personally relevant to the writer, who has her own experience of group attack, including via the internet, and (some) people’s willingness to make sweeping and vicious statements about other human beings they have never met, based on one … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', abuse, acceptance, anger, autonomy, blaming, boundaries, bullying, compassion, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, conflict, cultural questions, Disconnection, empathy, empowerment, external locus, internal locus of evaluation, kindness & compassion, objectification, perception, political, power and powerlessness, resilience, sadness & pain, scapegoating, self concept, self esteem, shadow, shaming, trauma, violence, vulnerability | Tagged abandoning self, abuse, acknowledgement, acknowledging, actualising, actualizing, affordable counselling exeter, anticipation, anxiety, armouring, authenticity, awfulising, awfulizing, being of service, being seen, belonging, betrayal, blame and shame model, Brené Brown, Buber, Buber I It, bullying, bystander apathy, caring what others think, catastrophising, catastrophizing, civil rights, clarity of values, closing down, closing your heart, communication, comparing self with others, comparison with others, compassion, conditions of worth, connectedness, connection, consent, consent to publication, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, courage, creativity, critics don't count, cruelty, culture of humiliation, cyber-bullying, de-armouring, dealing with criticism, dealing with haters, dealing with uncertainty, disconnection, Elizabeth Gilbert, embarrassment, empathy, ethic of service, ethics, exposure, facing judgement, fear, fear of humiliation, fear of unknown, feedback, freedom of expression, gainsayers, grief, grieving, handling criticism, handling uncertainty, harassment, Human Rights, humiliation, ideal self, innovation, inspiration, interconnectedness, interdependence, internet bullying, judgement, judgemental attitudes, Liz Gilbert, loneliness, loss, love and service, loving presence, low cost counselling exeter, meanness, minority influence, Monica Lewinsky, mortification, objectification, online bullying, online harassment, opening your heart, originality, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, perception, person centred counselling exeter, personal history, personal shifts, presence, public humiliation, public shaming, publication without consent, realness, receiving feedback, recontextualising experience, recontextualizing experience, resilience, scarcity mindset, Self, self abandonment, self armouring, self blame, self concept, self critical, self criticism, self discipline, self doubt, self esteem, self judgement, self protection, self worth, self-structure, service, service of the work, shame, shaming, showing up, shutting down, snapchat, spiritual discipline, staying open, suicide, sweaty creative, TED, the man in the arena, the unknown, Theodore Roosevelt, transformation, trauma, trolling, trust, unkindness, upstander, upstanding, value system, valuing yourself, vulnerability, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Questions Before Dark – Jeanne Lohmann

Posted on June 1, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

‘Day ends, and before sleep when the sky dies down, consider your altered state: has this day changed you? Are the corners sharper or rounded off? Did you live with death? Make decisions that quieted? Find one clear word that … Continue reading →

Posted in accountability, consciousness, creativity, dying, encounter, flow, growth, human condition, internal locus of evaluation, loss, meaning, metaphor & dream, perception, poetry, presence, self | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, being in the moment, change process, confusion, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, encounter, existential meaning, experiential, flow, human experience, internal locus, Jeanne Lohmann, learning process, loss, low cost counselling exeter, metaphor, mindfulness, mortality, mutability, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, presence, Questions before dark, transience, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Human – Chiara Montaldo’s interview

Posted on May 29, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Another interview clip from Yann Arthus-Bertrand’s film ‘Human’. This one feels especially relevant right now – something about engaging with reality, in place of story, and humanity, in place of ‘othering’. Here’s the short description for the ‘Human’ project/fim:- ‘What … Continue reading →

Posted in boundaries, compassion, conflict, cultural questions, Disconnection, diversity, equality, ethics, guilt, human condition, loss, perception, power and powerlessness, sadness & pain, scapegoating, shadow, trauma, violence, vulnerability, Yann Arthus-Bertrand | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, alienation, Chiara Montaldo, collective shadow, compassion, conflict, connectedness, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, disconnection, diversity, economic inequality, empathy, encounter, ethics, home, Human, human spirit, inequality, interconnection, interdependence, loss, low cost counselling exeter, need for home, Other Story, othering, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, refugee crisis, refugees, relationship, responsibility, scapegoating, shadow, shared humanity, Syrian refugees, trauma, violence, vulnerability, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk, Yann Arthus-Bertrand | Leave a comment

‘maggie and milly and molly and may’ ee cummings

Posted on May 5, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

‘maggie and milly and molly and may went down to the beach (to play one day) and maggie discovered a shell that sang so sweetly she couldn’t remember her troubles, and milly befriended a stranded star whose rays … Continue reading →

Posted in creativity, e.e. cummings, gratitude, growing up, identity, internal locus of evaluation, loss, natural world, organismic experiencing | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, coming home to ourselves, coming home to self, coming home to yourself, core conditions, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, e.e. cummings, ee cummings, identity, loss, low cost counselling exeter, maggie and milly and molly and may, organismic, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, perceptual reality, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, relationship, self concept, self-structure, therapeutic relationship, therapy, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Monica Lewinsky with Jon Ronson

Posted on April 26, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2016/apr/16/monica-lewinsky-shame-sticks-like-tar-jon-ronson Click on the link above for today’s post – Monica Lewinsky in a recent interview with Jon Ronson in The Guardian, well worth a read. In 2015, we published a link to, and a piece on, Monica’s wonderful TED talk ‘The … Continue reading →

Posted in abuse, blaming, bullying, compassion, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, consent, core conditions, cultural questions, Disconnection, emotions, empathy, empowerment, ethics, fear, Gender & culture, grief, healing, identity, interconnection & belonging, loneliness, loss, Monica Lewinsky, objectification, perception, political, power and powerlessness, sadness & pain, scapegoating, self, self concept, self esteem, sexual being, shadow, shame, shaming, suicide, trauma, trust, violence, vulnerability | Tagged abuse, acquiring a sense of self, affordable counselling exeter, anti-bullying advocacy, anti-bullying emojis, anti-bullying gifs, betrayal, bigotry, blame and shame model, bullying, bystander apathy, Bystander Revolution, bystanding, civil rights, communication, compassion, competing narrative, conditions of worth, consent, core pain, core trauma, core wound, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, cruelty, culture of humiliation, cure for shame, cyber-bullying, de-objectifying, dehumanising, dehumanizing, deobjectifying, developing a sense of self, disconnection, effects of shock, embarrassment, empathy, ethics, exclusion, exposure, fear, fear of ostracisation, feminism, grief, harassment, Human Rights, humiliation, identity, integrating trauma, internet bullying, internet shaming, Jon Ronson, judgement, legitimising bullying, legitimizing bullying, Lindsey Stone, loneliness, loss, low cost counselling exeter, Mike Daisey, misogyny, Monica In Black And White, Monica Lewinsky, mortification, mutual relationship, object of hate, objectification, online bullying, online harassment, ostracisation, ostracising, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, perception, person centred counselling exeter, projecting, public humiliation, public shaming, racism, recontextualising experience, recontextualizing experience, resilience, Self, self concept, self esteem, sense of self, shame, Shame and Survival, shaming, shock, shock behaviours, suicide, targeting difference, TED, threat to identity, threatened identity, transformation, trauma, trolling, upstander, upstanding, vulnerability, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

David Whyte on Love – ‘Much has been said’

Posted on April 18, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Beauty and depth, from David. Here’s the text, for those of our readers who have trouble seeing Facebook posts through the link:- “MUCH HAS BEEN SAID Much has been said about the eternal and untouchable nature of love, its tidal … Continue reading →

Posted in consciousness, creativity, David Whyte, dying, emotions, encounter, grief, immanence, interconnection & belonging, loss, love, meaning, perception, poetry, relationship, sadness & pain, shadow, spirituality, surrender, vulnerability | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, beyond the ordinary, British Cemetery Hermanville, consequences, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, David Whyte, disappearances, emergence, ephemeral, eternal, eternal nature of love, eternal source, existential meaning, fear, loss, love, love and loss, love and risk, love’s promises, low cost counselling exeter, mortality, mystery of love, Night Thoughts, ordinary, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, power of love, realisation, realization, shadow, shadow of loss, source, spirituality, timeless, transience, vulnerability, witness love, witnessing, witnessing love, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

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