Tag Archives: forgiveness

Linda Graham on Forgiveness

Posted on February 23, 2018 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

“Forgiveness does not mean condoning, pardoning, forgetting, false reconciliation, appeasement, or sentimentality. It is a practice, daily and lifelong, of cultivating our own inner peace and wisdom that allows us to see that our pain is part of the pain … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, accountability, anger, blaming, boundaries, ethics, forgiveness, growth, healing, interconnection & belonging, kindness & compassion, perception, power and powerlessness, sadness & pain, trust, values & principles | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, appeasement, condoning, coping with betrayal, coping with injustice, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, dealing with betrayal, dealing with injustice, ethical awareness, ethical compass, false reconciliation, forgetting, forgiveness, Linda Graham, low cost counselling exeter, moral compass, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, pardoning, person centred counselling exeter, practice of ethics, practising compassion, practising forgiveness, sentimentality, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

The thorn in my side – Anne Lamott

Posted on May 9, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://www.salon.com/2017/04/02/the-thorn-in-my-side-i-tried-to-let-go-of-my-poisonous-grudge-against-another-writer/ Click on the above link to visit http://www.salon.com for this excerpt from April from Anne’s new book ‘Hallelujah Anyway’. Interesting and open piece about resentment, self blame and moving on through…. Here’s the book link:- Palace Gate Counselling … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, anger, Anne Lamott, blaming, compulsive behaviour, conflict, cultural questions, identity, perception, power and powerlessness, presence, relationship, sadness & pain, scapegoating, self, self concept, self esteem, shadow, shame, shaming, spirituality, surrender | Tagged addiction, addictive behaviour, affordable counselling exeter, alienation, Anne Lamott, anxiety, anxiety and blame, authenticity, bearing grudges, being competitive, being heard, being judged, being rejected, Bird by Bird, blaming others, blessed are the meek, bondage of self, call and response, competition ethic, competitive tendencies, compulsion, compulsive behaviour, conditioning, conditions of worth, confession, connection, control over chaos, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, detachment, disliking yourself, divine love, ethic of service, experiencing jealousy, experiencing rejection, experiencing the gift, feeling competitive, feeling empty, feeling like a fuckup, feeling mean, feeling remorse, feeling shame, finding humility, finite human nature, fixing yourself, forgiveness, fucking up, grace and mercy, Grace Eventually, grief and confusion, Hallelujah Anyway, hearing someone’s pain, Help Thanks Wow, hiding, Imperfect Birds, jealousy and judgement, jealousy and judgment, judging others, keeping secrets, kindness, low cost counselling exeter, mercifulness, mercy, offering mercy, Operating Instructions, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, Paul’s second letter to the Corinthians, person centred counselling exeter, Plan B, presence, rediscovering mercy, regret, remorse, resist less, resistance, Rosie, Schadenfreude, Scoop Nisker, seeing the gift, self blame, self blaming, self concept, self dislike, self judgement, self judging, self judgment, self-loathing, self-structure, sense of emptiness, sense of humility, sense of identity, sense of self, sense of smallness, shaming, Small Victories, Some Assembly Required, spiritual autobiography, spiritual growth, spirituality, St. Paul’s letters, Stitches, submission and servitude, surrender, thorn in my side, toxic behaviour, toxic qualities, Traveling Mercies, truth out loud, try harder, trying and resistance, unconditional love, willingness, working with envy, working with resentment, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Liz Gilbert on how to hold ourselves lovingly when life’s tough

Posted on August 8, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Click on the link for this Facebook post by Liz Gilbert (of ‘Eat, Pray, Love’ fame). We posted something from Liz not that long ago – and this feels important, so here is another… People who come to this service … Continue reading →

Posted in abuse, acceptance, blaming, compassion, conditions of worth, core conditions, cultural questions, Disconnection, Elizabeth Gilbert, emotions, empathy, empowerment, grief, growth, guilt, kindness & compassion, love, Palace Gate Counselling Service, presence, resilience, sadness & pain, self, self concept, self esteem, transformation, trauma, vulnerability, working with clients | Tagged acceptance, accountability, affordable counselling exeter, authenticity, awakening, beautiful freak, being broken, being emotional, being judgmental, being sensitive, being with difficult feeling, brokenness, causing pain to others, compassion, confusion, core conditions, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, dealing with crisis, dealing with divorce, dealing with loss, denial, deserving love, difficult emotion, difficult feeling, distortion, divorce, Elizabeth Gilbert, embarrassment, emotional endurance, empathy, family illness, feeling broken, feeling shame, forgiveness, grace, grief, grieving, haters, hating, hatred, human struggle, hurting others, kindness, kindness to self, Liz Gilbert, loss, love, low cost counselling exeter, low self esteem, managing crisis, maturing, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, practicing self love, radical self acceptance, radical self love, regret, remorse, repression, responding to crisis, self abuse, self acceptance, self attack, self awareness, self care, self compassion, self criticism, self degradation, self doubt, self empathy, self esteem, self hatred, self honesty, self love, self-responsibility, shame, strong emotion, suffering, tenderness, transformation, uncertainty, wishing you were different, withholding, withholding love, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Send Forgiveness Viral – The Project

Posted on July 25, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Stop the outrage and #SendForgivenessViral | Written by Waleed Aly & Tom Whitty (@twhittyer) #TheProjectTV https://t.co/lMonyEhmB5 — #TheProjectTV (@theprojecttv) July 19, 2016 Forgiveness is a tricky word… The writer has often experienced working with a deeply traumatized human being who … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', abuse, acceptance, actualizing tendency, anger, blaming, communication, compassion, conflict, congruence, core conditions, creativity, cultural questions, Disconnection, emotions, empathy, encounter, external locus, fear, forgiveness, grief, healing, human condition, identity, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, loss, love, paradigm shift, perception, person centred, political, power and powerlessness, presence, relationship, resilience, self concept, shadow, trauma, trust, violence, vulnerability, working with clients | Tagged #SendForgivenessViral, affordable counselling exeter, awareness, blaming, building relationship, building trust, compassionate presence, conflict resolution, connectedness, connection, construction, constructive dialogue, core conditions, counselling exeter, counselling relationship, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creative dialogue, creativity, cycles of destruction, dealing with trauma, defensiveness, destruction, destructive spiral, disconnection, encounter, external locus, fear, fear and trauma, fear base, forgiveness, hate, hate crimes, holding space, how we forgive, internal locus, love base, low cost counselling exeter, moving beyond fear, neutralising threat, neutralizing threat, othering, out of awareness, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centered process, person centred counselling exeter, person centred process, presence, processing trauma, resilience, responding to hate, responding to terrorism, self concept, self-structure, send forgiveness viral, sense of self, shadow, shaming, Sonia Kruger, spiritual bypass, The Project TV, therapeutic process, therapeutic relationship, threat response, Tom Whitty, trauma and fear, trauma work, trusting the client, trusting the process, unconscious, unowned emotion, unowned feeling, unowned process, Waleed Aly, witnessing, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Mouthful of Forevers by Clementine von Radics

Posted on December 2, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

“I am not the first person you loved. You are not the first person I looked at with a mouthful of forevers. We have both known loss like the sharp edges of a knife. We have both lived with lips … Continue reading →

Posted in beauty, conditions of worth, core conditions, creativity, embodiment, emotions, empathy, encounter, fear, forgiveness, growth, healing, interconnection & belonging, loneliness, loss, love, meaning, metaphor & dream, physical being, poetry, presence, relationship, risk, sadness & pain, sexual being, surrender, touch, trust, vulnerability | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, being seen, being seen by another, belonging, brokenness, Clementine von Radics, closeness, coming home, conditional love, conditions of worth, connectedness, connection, core conditions, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, empathy, encounter, fear, forgiveness, grief, grieving, healing, home, homecoming, hope, human relationship, imperfection, imperfectness, interconnection, intimacy, loneliness, loss, love poems, love poetry, low cost counselling exeter, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, presence, relationship, romantic love, separation, sexual love, sexual relationship, trust, unconditional love, vulnerability, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Liz Gilbert on Mercy

Posted on November 23, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Timely post from Liz on the high cost of ‘othering’ people, our interdependence and our need for compassion towards ourselves and each other. Here’s her latest book:- http://www.amazon.co.uk/Big-Magic-Creative-Living-Beyond/dp/1408866730/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1448297023&sr=1-1&keywords=elizabeth+gilbert+big+magic And here’s Mary Gauthier, on the same theme:- https://palacegatecounsellingservice.wordpress.com/2014/07/29/mary-gauthier-mercy-now/ Palace Gate Counselling … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', accountability, anger, blaming, communication, compassion, conflict, consciousness, core conditions, cultural questions, Disconnection, Elizabeth Gilbert, emotions, empathy, ethics, fear, forgiveness, good, grief, guilt, human condition, interconnection & belonging, kindness & compassion, love, objectification, paradigm shift, political, power and powerlessness, presence, relationship, sadness & pain, scapegoating, self, self concept, self esteem, shadow, shame, trauma, trust, violence, vulnerability | Tagged action and reaction, affordable counselling exeter, alienation, altruism, anger, Beirut bombs, belonging, Big Magic, Buber, challenge, closed heart, closing borders, closing down, compassion, connectedness, connection, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, Creative Living Beyond Fear, dehumanising, dehumanizing, despair, difficult experience, difficult feeling, disconnecting, disconnection, Elizabeth Gilbert, empathy, eye for an eye, fear, feeling cornered, feeling threatened, forgiveness, fragmentation, generosity, grief, grieving, guilt, hard heart, human condition, human nature, human needs, humanity, I it relationship, insularity, interconnection, interdependence, Isis, isolation, kindness, lack of humanity, Liz Gilbert, loving kindness, low cost counselling exeter, Mali attack, mercilessness, mercy, objectification, objectifying, open heart, opening, oppression, othering, overwhelm, pain, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, panic, Paris attack, people as things, person centred counselling exeter, power and powerlessness, presence, rage, reacting and responding, refugee crisis, relationship, revenge, revolution, sacrifice, self compassion, self concept, self hating, self hatred, self-structure, separation, sharing resources, softening, sorrow, suffering, tenderness, threat, uncomfortable experience, uncomfortable feeling, under threat, violence, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Human

Posted on November 15, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

For the writer, this says all that is necessary. It illustrates what is (catastrophically) left out of account by the ‘perpetrator’/’victim’ binary mindset favoured in our cultures as they stand…. Thank you to Yaacov Darling Khan for posting this on Facebook, and … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', abuse, accountability, anger, awakening, blaming, childhood abuse, communication, compassion, conditions of worth, core conditions, criminal justice model, cultural questions, Disconnection, emotions, empathy, encounter, forgiveness, Gabor Mate, interconnection & belonging, kindness & compassion, love, meaning, paradigm shift, relationship, sadness & pain, self, self concept, shadow, transformation, trauma, trust, violence, vulnerability, Yann Arthus-Bertrand | Tagged 'evil', abuse, accountability, adverse childhood event, adverse childhood experience, affordable counselling exeter, alienation, anger, awakening, blaming, childhood abuse, communication, compassion, conditions of worth, core conditions, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, criminal justice system, disconnection, empathy, encounter, forgiveness, fragmentation, Gabor Mate, Human, kindness, learning to love, low cost counselling exeter, modeling love, modelling love, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, relationship, self concept, separation, shadow, transformation, vulnerability, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk, Yann Arthus-Bertrand | 1 Comment

How to prepare emotionally for the death of a difficult parent – Jeff Brown

Posted on November 11, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://soulshaping.com/soulshaping/difficult-parent/ Helpful piece, thanks Jeff. Palace Gate Counselling Service, Exeter Counselling Exeter since 1994

Posted in abuse, acceptance, actualizing tendency, awakening, blaming, body psychotherapy, bodywork, child development, childhood abuse, communication, conditions of worth, conflict, consciousness, cultural questions, dependence, Disconnection, dying, embodiment, emotions, empathy, empowerment, encounter, external locus, family systems, fear, forgiveness, generational trauma, grief, growing up, guilt, healing, human condition, identity, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, Jeff Brown, kindness & compassion, loss, love, parenting, perception, person centred, presence, reality, relationship, resilience, sadness & pain, self, self concept, self esteem, shame, shaming, surrender, transformation, trauma, trust, vulnerability | Tagged absence, acceptance, acknowledgement, actualising, actualizing, affordable counselling exeter, An Uncommon Bond, ancestors, ancestral pain, ancestral shame, Apologies to the Divine Feminine, Ascending, authenticity, awakened consciousness, awakening, awakening consciousness, bereavement, blame, blaming, body centered psychotherapy, body psychotherapy, bodywork, carrying it forward, child rearing, child self, childhood beliefs, collective consciousness, collective heart, completion, complex grief, conditioning, conditions of worth, confusion, connectedness, connection, context, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, death of mother, death of parent, developmental stages, dialogue, difficult relationships, disappointment, distorted perception, duty, dying mother, dying parent, embodiment, emotional absence, emotional armour, emotional baggage, emotional debris, emotional paralysis, emotional risk, emotional safety, emotional threat, empowerment, encounter, familial ancestors, familial relationship, family relationship, fantasy, forgiveness, forgiving, gender, generational healing, generational pain, generational trauma, grief, grief process, grief therapy, grieving, grieving difficult relationships, guilt, healing, healing conflict, healing rifts, healthy connection, heartbreak, human condition, human development, human limitations, imprints, incomplete, individuating, individuation, inner narrative, interconnection, interdependence, internalised guilt, internalized guilt, introjections, Jeff Brown, Karmageddon, karmic ancestors, kindness, learning to value ourselves, letting go, life experiences, loss, loss of mother, loss of parent, Love it Forward, loving parenting, loving relationship, low cost counselling exeter, metamorphosis, mystification, narrative, need for fantasy, obligation, overcoming, pain, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, parenting, perception, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, personal beliefs, personal transformation, presence, process work, protective mother, psychotherapy, reality, realness, recognition, reflection work, reflective work, rejection, relational dynamics, relationship, relationship therapy, religious perspective, repressed emotions, resolution, safety, self abuse, self blame, self concept, self distraction, self esteem, self love, self protection, self validation, self worth, self-structure, separation, shame, shame and abuse, shame game, shaming, Soulshaping, Spiritual Graffiti, stagnation, surrender, survivalist conditioning, sustainable transformation, talk therapy, talking therapy, tenderness, therapeutic process, therapeutic work, therapy, things unsaid, threat response, toxic parenting, toxic relationship, transformation, unactualized dreams, unconsciousness, unexpressed anger, unhealed grief, unresolved experiences, unresolved memories, validation, validation from others, vigilance, vulnerability, wanting attention, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

If They Stayed: A Letter to You – Kristin Ryan

Posted on October 13, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

https://iamnotasilentpoet.wordpress.com/2015/10/13/if-they-stayed-a-letter-to-you-by-kristin-ryan/ Powerful piece by Kristin. With many thanks to her, and also thanks to ‘I am not a silent poet’ and Reuben Woolley. Palace Gate Counselling Service, Exeter Counselling Exeter since 1994

Posted in 'evil', abuse, acceptance, accountability, anger, childhood abuse, Eating, emotions, fear, forgiveness, growing up, healing, identity, parenting, poetry, power and powerlessness, relationship, resilience, sadness & pain, self, shadow, trauma, trust, violence, vulnerability | Tagged 'eating disorder', abuse, adverse childhood event, adverse childhood experience, affordable counselling exeter, alcohol and violence, anger, childhood abuse, consequences, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, emotional consequences, familial violence, forgiveness, healing, identity, Kristin Ryan, low cost counselling exeter, not a silent poet, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, personal experience of trauma, refusing forgiveness, relationship, Reuben Woolley, trauma, trust, trust in relationship, violence, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | 2 Comments

The Hope Chest: The writing on the wall – Kim Johancen-Walt

Posted on March 31, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://ct.counseling.org/2015/03/the-hope-chest-the-writing-on-the-wall/ Interesting couple of case studies with Kim’s thoughts, from Counseling Today, a publication of The American Counseling Association. Palace Gate Counselling Service, Exeter

Posted in abuse, acceptance, actualizing tendency, anger, awakening, beauty, childhood abuse, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, conflict, core conditions, dependence, Disconnection, Eating, emotions, empowerment, encounter, external locus, family systems, fear, forgiveness, grief, growth, healing, identity, internal locus of evaluation, kindness & compassion, loss, love, meaning, perception, person centred, person centred theory, power and powerlessness, presence, relationship, sadness & pain, self, self concept, self esteem, suicide, surrender, therapeutic growth, therapeutic relationship, transformation, trauma, trust, violence, vulnerability, working with clients | Tagged abandonment, abuse, acceptance, achievement, acknowledgement, adverse childhood experience, affordable counselling exeter, alcohol abuse, American Counseling Association, approval, awareness, awareness and change, behaviour patterns, childhood physical abuse, childhood sexual abuse, childhood violent abuse, commitment in therapy, compassion, complex grief, complicated grief, conditions of worth, Counseling Today, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, cycles of abandonment, cycles of abuse, depression, despair, expectations in therapy, forgiveness, frustration, good enough, grief, growth, healing, hope, identity, Kim Johancen-Walt, letting go, limiting beliefs, loss, love, loving kindness, low cost counselling exeter, Maitri, meaning, minimizing feelings, natural healing process, not good enough, numbing, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, perfectionism, perpetuating abuse, perpetuating trauma, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, personal experience, personal identity, personal needs, powerlessness, recovery, relationship, self abandonment, self abuse, self concept, self criticism, self esteem, self harm, self medication, self punishment, self worth, self-injury, stuckness, stuckness in therapy, substance abuse, suicidal ideation, suicidal intention, suicidal thoughts, suicide, surrender, The Hope Chest, therapeutic growth, therapeutic process, therapeutic relationship, thought patterns, transformative change, trauma, unconditional positive regard, unresolved grief, UPR, victim identity, victim mentality, victim mindset, victimhood, withholding love, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

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