Tag Archives: dependence

What it Really Means to Hold Space for Someone – Heather Plett

Posted on November 21, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

What it Really Means to Hold Space for Someone Click on the above link for this wonderful piece on Uplift Connect from May this year by Heather – not generally a fan of ‘8 tips’ type articles, but been meaning … Continue reading →

Posted in autonomy, boundaries, client as 'expert', communication, compassion, congruence, core conditions, emotions, empathy, empowerment, encounter, equality, ethics, grief, growth, internal locus of evaluation, non-directive counselling, Palace Gate Counselling Service, person centred, power and powerlessness, resilience, risk, self concept, shadow, shame, shaming, supervision, transformation, trauma, trust, values & principles, vulnerability, working with clients | Tagged accompanying someone, affordable counselling exeter, autonomy, autonomy to make choices, beating yourself up, being lost, being there for someone, brokenness, coaching skills, compassion, complex emotions, counselling exeter, counselling skills, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, courage to take risks, creating a container, creating safe space, cultural norms, dealing with an addiction, dependence, disempowering, diversity, ego trap, emotional growth, empowering, ethic of service, facilitating skills, falling apart, fear, fear of falling apart, feeling broken, feeling empowered, feeling incompetent, feeling lost, feeling safe, feeling unworthy, feeling useless, fixing people, gentle guidance, giving guidance, giving permission, going through transition, grief, grieving, Heather Plett, holding space, holding the rim, honouring difference, humility, learning from mistakes, listening skills, low cost counselling exeter, making mistakes, making space, meaningful work, non directive, non judgemental listening, non judgmental, offering guidance, offering support, okay to make mistakes, overcoming ego, overwhelming, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, personal growth, personal shadow, preoccupation with self, psychological growth, resilience, respecting difference, risks and growth, sacred space, safe enough to fail, safe space, self absorption, self care, self concept, self concern, self other distinction, self worth, self-structure, serving others, shadow work, shaming, spiritual growth, supervision support, support not control, support system, supporting others, supporting someone who is anxious, supporting someone who is depressed, supporting someone who is grieving, supporting someone who is suicidal, taking power away, taking risks, teaching skills, tenderness, thoughtfulness, transformation, transition, trauma, trust, trusting intuition, trusting your own wisdom, trusting yourself, unconditional relationship, unconditional support, unconditionality, Uplift Connect, vulnerability, vulnerable, walking alongside, what it means to hold space, withholding judgement, working at depth, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Matt Licata on not allowing ‘spirituality’ to shame our needs

Posted on January 20, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

This is so important. The blame and shame model is always toxic, whether the more traditional style, or clad in New Age robes. We all feel, and we all need – it’s integral to the human experience. The helpful response is … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, actualizing tendency, awakening, blaming, bullying, compassion, conditions of worth, consciousness, core conditions, cultural questions, dependence, embodiment, emotions, empathy, empowerment, encounter, growth, human condition, immanence, kindness & compassion, love, Matt Licata, presence, reality, relationship, sadness & pain, self, self concept, self esteem, shame, shaming, spirituality, therapeutic growth, therapeutic relationship, touch, vulnerability | Tagged affection, affordable counselling exeter, aggression, aggression of blame, attachment, attunement, being met, being seen, beloved, blame, blaming, caregivers, commitment to self, compassion, completeness, conditional love, conditions of worth, connection, contact, core beliefs, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creativity, dependence, despair, disappointment, Elizabeth Gadd Photography, embodied experience, empathic connection, empathic failure, empathy, encounter, energy, enlightenment, expressing needs, failure of empathy, faith, family of origin, getting needs met in relationship, growth, having needs, hopelessness, human limitations, human needs, invalidation, kindness, lack of validation, Lizzy Gadd, longing, loving kindness, low cost counselling exeter, low self esteem, low vibration, manifestation, manifesting, Matt Licata, misunderstanding, need for affection, need for contact, need for love, need for touch, need to be heard, need to be received, need to be seen, need to be witnessed, neediness, New Age, new age fundamentalism, no self, not good enough, open heart, own being, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, personal growth, presence, relational animal, relational mammal, relationship, risk, self blame, self care, self compassion, self concept, self esteem, self expression, self judgement, self judgment, self perception, self worth, self-responsibility, self-structure, separation, shame, shaming, spiritual aggression, spiritual growth, spirituality, suppressing need, suppressing self expression, transcendence, trust, unlived life, unmet need, validation, validation of needs, wholeness, withdrawal, witnessing, worth as a person, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk, yearning | Leave a comment

David Whyte on Giving

Posted on December 19, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

A seasonal meditation from David… Palace Gate Counselling Service, Exeter Counselling in Exeter since 1994

Posted in communication, core conditions, creativity, cultural questions, David Whyte, dependence, emotions, empathy, empowerment, encounter, friendship, gratitude, growth, identity, interconnection & belonging, kindness & compassion, love, meaning, meditation, mindfulness, perception, photographs & pictures, presence, relationship, risk, self esteem, trust, vulnerability | Tagged acknowledgement, acknowledging others, act of courage, affordable counselling exeter, aliveness, altruism, art of giving, being seen, belonging, bonding, boundaries, communal well being, community, connectedness, connection, Consolations, contemplation, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creativity, David Whyte, dependence, empathy, empowerment, existential meaning, frames of reference, generosity, genius of gift giving, gifting, gifts, giving in relationship, gratitude, heartbreak, human needs, imagination, inspiration, interconnection, interdependence, learning to give, low cost counselling exeter, maturation process, meditation, mindfulness, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, receiving, relationship, relationship to others, relationship to self, relationship to time, self esteem, self worth, self-discovery, selflessness, silent contemplation, Solace Nourishment and Underlying Meaning of Everyday Words, spontaneity, test of character, trust, understanding another, validation, valuing others, well-being, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Chelsea Fields on the decision to circumsize her baby son

Posted on October 18, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

The writer found it difficult to reach the end of this deeply moving personal account, because of the extent to which she was crying. There’s a quotation from James Hillman we tweeted the other day:- ‘..the question of evil….refers primarily … Continue reading →

Posted in awakening, compassion, congruence, consciousness, core conditions, cultural questions, dependence, Disconnection, embodiment, emotions, empathy, ethics, external locus, family systems, generational trauma, grief, growing up, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, James Hillman, Jung, loss, love, non-conforming, organismic experiencing, parenting, perception, physical being, power and powerlessness, pregnancy, relationship, sadness & pain, trauma, trust, violence, vulnerability | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, anesthetized heart, authenticity, awakening, belonging, causing pain, Chelsea Fields, circumcision, compassion, congruence, core conditions, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, cultural attitudes to children, cultural attitudes to circumsion, dependence, disconnection, embodiment, emotions, empathy, ethics, external locus, family systems, grief, interconnection, interdependence, internal locus, James Hillman, Jung, loss, love, low cost counselling exeter, making choices for your baby, making choices for your child, non-conforming, pain, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, parenting, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, pregnancy, relationship, sadness, trauma, trust, unconscious, vulnerability, whether or not to circumcise, whether or not to circumsize, witnessing pain, witnessing suffering, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Person-centred Basics – Janet Tolan on Labels

Posted on October 2, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

The third in our occasional series of some person-centred fundamentals. ‘There are many ways of describing people who use services such as housing, education and health. Some of these are also used of counselling clients: this client is “manipulative”, that … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', abuse, accountability, actualizing tendency, blaming, Carl Rogers, compassion, conditions of worth, congruence, core conditions, cultural questions, Disconnection, diversity, empathy, encounter, ethics, external locus, fear, growth, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, Janet Tolan, love, meaning, non-conforming, non-directive counselling, objectification, organismic experiencing, perception, person centred, person centred theory, political, presence, psychiatry, reality, relationship, sadness & pain, shadow, shaming, therapeutic growth, therapeutic relationship, unconditional positive regard, values & principles, working with clients | Tagged 19 Propositions, abusers, accountability, actualising, actualizing, affordable counselling exeter, attention-seeking, autonomy, awareness, beliefs in therapy, belonging, binary, blame culture, blaming, Carl Rogers, co dependence, coercive culture, compassion, condemnation, conformity, connectedness, connection, core conditions, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellor self awareness, counsellors Exeter, cultural coercion, cultural norms, cultural orthodoxy, cultural values, de-armouring, defensiveness, dependence, dependence in counselling, dependence in therapy, dependent client, dualistic, emotional landscape, empathic engagement, empathy, ethical tasks in therapy, ethics, fear, fear in counsellor, fear in therapist, goal-directed behaviour, gratitude, human needs, I it relationship, I Thou relationship, independent thinkers, independent thought, interconnectedness, interconnection, interdependence, internal frame of reference, internal locus, isolation, Janet Tolan, judgement in counselling, judgement in therapy, judgemental attitudes, labelling people, low cost counselling exeter, manipulative, Martin Buber, meeting needs indirectly, narcissist, narcissistic, neediness, needy client, Nineteen Propositions, non-conforming, objectifying, pain, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, PCA, perceived threat, perceptual field, perpetrators, person centered approach, person centred counselling exeter, person centred work with clients, person-centered, person-centred, person-centred approach, personal growth, personal landscape, personal therapy, personality theory, phenomenal field, projection, punishment, reality, responsibility, self concept, self-structure, shadow, shaming, Skills in Person-centred Counselling, social change, social conformity, social values, sociopath, survivors, therapeutic process, therapeutic relationship, therapist process, therapist self awareness, therapy training, toxic culture, trauma, us and them, victim blaming, victims, working with clients, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

When Children Lie – Patty Wipfler – Hand in Hand Parenting

Posted on August 26, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://www.handinhandparenting.org/article/when-children-lie/ This is a helpful site, and a helpful article, if you are looking to find effective ways to parent outside the culturally prevalent models of fault, blame and punishment. In the writer’s experience, most parents deeply want what is … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, accountability, anger, blaming, child development, communication, compassion, conditions of worth, conflict, consent, core conditions, cultural questions, dependence, Disconnection, emotions, empathy, encounter, equality, ethics, external locus, family systems, fear, generational trauma, growing up, Hand in Hand Parenting, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, kindness & compassion, love, parenting, power and powerlessness, relationship, self, self concept, self esteem, shame, shaming, teaching, trust, vulnerability | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, anger, blame, boundaries, boundaries in parenting, closeness, coercive parenting, coercive relationship, cold shoulder, competition, competitiveness, conditions of worth, conscious parenting, consequences, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, dealing with tantrums, dependence, disapproval, discipline in parenting, disconnection, effect of competition on children, effect of competition on self esteem, emotional safety, emotional truths, empathy, excluding, exclusion, experimentation in parenting, external locus, fear, handling tantrums, hope, humiliating, humiliation, intimacy, judgemental parenting, learning in parenting, love, low cost counselling exeter, lying in children, meeting needs indirectly, motivation, my child lies, need for approval, need for attention, need for love, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, Patty Wipfler, perceived threat, person centered parenting, person centred counselling exeter, person centred parenting, person-centered, person-centred, positive attention, power imbalance, punishing, punishment, punishment as control, relational withdrawal, responsibility, safety, saying no, security, self concept, self esteem in children, shame, shaming, social lies, standards of truth, stay listening, staylistening, tantrums, threat, toxic culture, toxic shame, trust, truth telling, understanding, undivided attention, when children lie, withdrawal, www.handinhandparenting.org, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Patrick Speaks – Unreported World

Posted on February 2, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

https://www.facebook.com/hashtag/patrickspeaks?source=feed_text&story_id=10206189718128168 This is just lovely….the writer cried at the point where he begins to get what is being offered – seeing the fire of hope catch and leap….Magical and inspiring. Gratitude to Raymond for the work he is doing, lighting … Continue reading →

Posted in actualizing tendency, awakening, beauty, civil rights, communication, consciousness, dependence, Disconnection, education, empowerment, equality, good, healing, identity, interconnection & belonging, kindness & compassion, political, power and powerlessness, relationship, self concept, teaching, therapeutic growth, transformation | Tagged actualising, actualizing, affordable counselling exeter, altruism, awakening, beauty, belonging, civil rights, communication, consiousness, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, dependence, disconnection, economic inequality, education, empowerment, ethic of service, good, hope, identity, inequality, interconnectedness, interconnection, low cost counselling exeter, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, political, powerlessness, self concept, social inequality, teaching, transformation, web of life, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Johann Hari on Addiction

Posted on January 23, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/johann-hari/the-real-cause-of-addicti_b_6506936.html Click on the link for this excellent article. We have seen this in a number of places over the past few days (thank you, Brent Potter and Monica Cassani), and it deserves a wide audience. The writer’s sense at … Continue reading →

Posted in actualizing tendency, anti-depressants, anti-psychotics, civil rights, compulsive behaviour, consciousness, core conditions, criminal justice model, cultural questions, dependence, Disconnection, Gabor Mate, George Monbiot, healing, human condition, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, loneliness, Palace Gate Counselling Service, paradigm shift, perception, person centred, person centred theory, physical being, political, power and powerlessness, psychiatric abuse, psychiatric drugs, psychiatry, reality, relationship, research evidence, sadness & pain, suicide, therapeutic growth, therapeutic relationship, trauma, vulnerability, working with clients | Tagged 12 Step model, actualising, actualizing, adaptation, adaptive behaviour, addiction, addictive behaviour, affordable counselling exeter, age of loneliness, belonging, Billie Holiday, bonding, Bruce Alexander, Carl Rogers, Carl Rogers' potatoes, cause of drug addiction, causes of drug addiction, Chasing the Scream, chemical hooks, cocaine addiction, compulsive behaviour, context, coping mechanism, coping strategies, core conditions, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, criminal justice system, cultural oppression, decriminalising drugs, decriminalizing drugs, dependence, disconnection, disempowering, disempowerment, drug dependency, drug related deaths, drug related homicide, drug related murder, drug related suicide, drug use, drug use in prisoners, drug use in soldiers, drug war, drug withdrawal, EM Forster, Gabor Mate, George Monbiot, healing, heroin addiction, human connection, interconnectedness, interconnection, internal locus, Johann Hari, low cost counselling exeter, need for connection, need for relationship, nicotine patches, nicotine withdrawal, numbing, only connect, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, paradigm shift, Partnership for a Drug free America, person centred counselling exeter, Peter Cohen, political, Portuguese drug laws, potatoes in cellar, prescription drug use, prison system, rat cocaine experiment, Rat Park, recreational drug use, relationship, Richard DeGrandpre, smoking, stopping smoking, The Cult of Pharmacology, therapeutic conditions, therapeutic process, trauma, unconditional love, UPR, Uruguay President, Vietnam War, vulnerability, war on drugs, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

The Myth of Codependency – Julie Wilson

Posted on January 13, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://www.southlakeuniontherapy.com/codependency/ Click on the link for this helpful piece. The writer has a particular dislike for the word ‘co-dependency’, used in the culturally prevalent way as a term of abuse for self and/or other – and the accompanying inability to … Continue reading →

Posted in communication, conditions of worth, cultural questions, dependence, Disconnection, emotions, family systems, healing, human condition, interconnection & belonging, loneliness, love, perception, relationship, trust, vulnerability | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, belonging, Can Love last, co dependence, communication, conditions of worth, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, cultural questions, dependence, disconnection, emotions, family systems, human condition, interconnectedness, interconnection, judgement, Julie Wilson, loneliness, love, low cost counselling exeter, need, neediness, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, perception, person centred counselling exeter, relationship, Stephen Mitchell, trust, vulnerability, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | 2 Comments

Tag Archives: dependence

Archives

Meta