Tag Archives: consent

Never Read the Comments – Liz Gilbert

Posted on June 2, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

” This feels personally relevant to the writer, who has her own experience of group attack, including via the internet, and (some) people’s willingness to make sweeping and vicious statements about other human beings they have never met, based on one … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', abuse, acceptance, anger, autonomy, blaming, boundaries, bullying, compassion, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, conflict, cultural questions, Disconnection, empathy, empowerment, external locus, internal locus of evaluation, kindness & compassion, objectification, perception, political, power and powerlessness, resilience, sadness & pain, scapegoating, self concept, self esteem, shadow, shaming, trauma, violence, vulnerability | Tagged abandoning self, abuse, acknowledgement, acknowledging, actualising, actualizing, affordable counselling exeter, anticipation, anxiety, armouring, authenticity, awfulising, awfulizing, being of service, being seen, belonging, betrayal, blame and shame model, Brené Brown, Buber, Buber I It, bullying, bystander apathy, caring what others think, catastrophising, catastrophizing, civil rights, clarity of values, closing down, closing your heart, communication, comparing self with others, comparison with others, compassion, conditions of worth, connectedness, connection, consent, consent to publication, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, courage, creativity, critics don't count, cruelty, culture of humiliation, cyber-bullying, de-armouring, dealing with criticism, dealing with haters, dealing with uncertainty, disconnection, Elizabeth Gilbert, embarrassment, empathy, ethic of service, ethics, exposure, facing judgement, fear, fear of humiliation, fear of unknown, feedback, freedom of expression, gainsayers, grief, grieving, handling criticism, handling uncertainty, harassment, Human Rights, humiliation, ideal self, innovation, inspiration, interconnectedness, interdependence, internet bullying, judgement, judgemental attitudes, Liz Gilbert, loneliness, loss, love and service, loving presence, low cost counselling exeter, meanness, minority influence, Monica Lewinsky, mortification, objectification, online bullying, online harassment, opening your heart, originality, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, perception, person centred counselling exeter, personal history, personal shifts, presence, public humiliation, public shaming, publication without consent, realness, receiving feedback, recontextualising experience, recontextualizing experience, resilience, scarcity mindset, Self, self abandonment, self armouring, self blame, self concept, self critical, self criticism, self discipline, self doubt, self esteem, self judgement, self protection, self worth, self-structure, service, service of the work, shame, shaming, showing up, shutting down, snapchat, spiritual discipline, staying open, suicide, sweaty creative, TED, the man in the arena, the unknown, Theodore Roosevelt, transformation, trauma, trolling, trust, unkindness, upstander, upstanding, value system, valuing yourself, vulnerability, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Monica Lewinsky with Jon Ronson

Posted on April 26, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2016/apr/16/monica-lewinsky-shame-sticks-like-tar-jon-ronson Click on the link above for today’s post – Monica Lewinsky in a recent interview with Jon Ronson in The Guardian, well worth a read. In 2015, we published a link to, and a piece on, Monica’s wonderful TED talk ‘The … Continue reading →

Posted in abuse, blaming, bullying, compassion, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, consent, core conditions, cultural questions, Disconnection, emotions, empathy, empowerment, ethics, fear, Gender & culture, grief, healing, identity, interconnection & belonging, loneliness, loss, Monica Lewinsky, objectification, perception, political, power and powerlessness, sadness & pain, scapegoating, self, self concept, self esteem, sexual being, shadow, shame, shaming, suicide, trauma, trust, violence, vulnerability | Tagged abuse, acquiring a sense of self, affordable counselling exeter, anti-bullying advocacy, anti-bullying emojis, anti-bullying gifs, betrayal, bigotry, blame and shame model, bullying, bystander apathy, Bystander Revolution, bystanding, civil rights, communication, compassion, competing narrative, conditions of worth, consent, core pain, core trauma, core wound, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, cruelty, culture of humiliation, cure for shame, cyber-bullying, de-objectifying, dehumanising, dehumanizing, deobjectifying, developing a sense of self, disconnection, effects of shock, embarrassment, empathy, ethics, exclusion, exposure, fear, fear of ostracisation, feminism, grief, harassment, Human Rights, humiliation, identity, integrating trauma, internet bullying, internet shaming, Jon Ronson, judgement, legitimising bullying, legitimizing bullying, Lindsey Stone, loneliness, loss, low cost counselling exeter, Mike Daisey, misogyny, Monica In Black And White, Monica Lewinsky, mortification, mutual relationship, object of hate, objectification, online bullying, online harassment, ostracisation, ostracising, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, perception, person centred counselling exeter, projecting, public humiliation, public shaming, racism, recontextualising experience, recontextualizing experience, resilience, Self, self concept, self esteem, sense of self, shame, Shame and Survival, shaming, shock, shock behaviours, suicide, targeting difference, TED, threat to identity, threatened identity, transformation, trauma, trolling, upstander, upstanding, vulnerability, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Gabor Maté on Addiction, change & relationship with someone who is addicted

Posted on October 6, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

‘To live with an addict of any kind is frustrating, emotionally painful and often infuriating. Family, friends and spouse may feel they are dealing with a double personality: one sane and lovable, the other devious and uncaring. They believe the … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, accountability, actualizing tendency, anger, blaming, communication, compulsive behaviour, consent, core conditions, cultural questions, dependence, Disconnection, emotions, encounter, ethics, family systems, Gabor Mate, guilt, loss, person centred, power and powerlessness, relationship, research evidence, sadness & pain, self concept, shadow, shaming, transformation | Tagged 7 stages, acceptance, accepting others, acknowledging reality, addict, addiction, adult-to-adult relationships, affordable counselling exeter, anger, attempting to change others, autonomous, autonomy, blame, blaming, brain physiology, broken promises, changing others, choice, coercion, confrontation, consent, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, dishonesty, double personality, Edward Deci, emotional withdrawal, family attitudes in addiction, fear, frustration, Gabor Mate, guilt, guilt and resentment, harmful behaviour, hostility, hurtful behaviour, intention, intervention, judgement, leaving an addict, low cost counselling exeter, Maia Szalawitz, manipulating, motivation, motivation and addiction, motivational techniques, not judging, nurture, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, parenting, person centred counselling exeter, punishing, punishment, rage, Realm of Hungry Ghosts, reforming an addict, rejecting, rejection, relationship with an addict, resenting, resentment, resentment in relationship, responsibility, sabotage in relationship, self abnegation, self concept, self-mastery, self-responsibility, self-sacrifice, self-structure, seven stages, shadow, shame, shaming, soul suicide, taking responsibility for another person's behaviour, tolerating behaviour, tough love, toxic relationship, unconditional acceptance, unreliability, wisdom, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Ending Power Struggles with Children – Hand in Hand Parenting – Patty Wipfler

Posted on August 2, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://www.handinhandparenting.org/article/ending-power-struggles-with-children/ At the heart of person centred is the idea that we each have inherent value, and that there is a fundamental equality between us. Whatever differences there may be in our life experience, culture, age, gender, race, ability, education, … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, actualizing tendency, child development, communication, compassion, consent, core conditions, creativity, cultural questions, dependence, diversity, education, emotions, empathy, empowerment, encounter, equality, family systems, flow, growing up, Hand in Hand Parenting, interconnection & belonging, love, non-directive counselling, organismic experiencing, parenting, perception, person centred, person centred theory, power and powerlessness, presence, relationship, self, self concept, self esteem, spirituality, teaching, therapeutic growth, therapeutic relationship, values & principles, vulnerability | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, assertiveness, autonomy, child development, confidence, conscious parenting, consent, core conditions, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, developmental stages, diversity, equalising power, equality, equalizing power, Hand in Hand Parenting, independence, interdependence, internal locus, low cost counselling exeter, nurture, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, parenting, Patty Wipfler, person centred counselling exeter, person centred parenting, person-centred, power in relationship, power struggle with children, saying no, self esteem, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Eyes Open by Jess Davies

Posted on May 21, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

https://iamnotasilentpoet.wordpress.com/2015/05/20/eyes-open-by-jess-davies/ Click on the link for this powerful and moving poem about sexual experiencing, written and spoken by Jess Davies. Thank you to Jess, Reuben Woolley and ‘I am not a silent poet’ on Facebook and WordPress. Palace Gate Counselling … Continue reading →

Posted in abuse, communication, conditions of worth, consent, creativity, cultural questions, emotions, empathy, feminine, Gender & culture, internal locus of evaluation, organismic experiencing, perception, poetry, political, power and powerlessness, relationship, sexual being, sexual violence, touch, trauma, trust, vulnerability | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, conditions of worth, consent, core conditions, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, emotional abandonment, empathy, feminine sexual experience, feminine sexual experiencing, gender and culture, gender and sexuality, I am not a silent poet, Jess Davies, low cost counselling exeter, not a silent poet, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, power and powerlessness, relationship, Reuben Woolley, sexual being, sexual experiencing, sexual trauma, sexual violence, trauma, trust, vulnerability, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Consent – Sex and Tea

Posted on May 13, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

This is cool. Consent explained in terms of having a cup of tea. It’s less than 3 minutes long, amusing, and deftly makes the relevant points. Seems like a useful resource in a school context…. Thank you to the following … Continue reading →

Posted in communication, consent, creativity, education, ethics, objectification, perception, political, power and powerlessness, relationship, sexual being, sexual violence, values & principles, vulnerability | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, Blue Seat, consent, consent and tea, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, explaining consent, Graham Wheeler, initiating sex, low cost counselling exeter, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, Rachel Brian, rape, Rockstar Dinosaur Pirate Princess, sexual assault, sexual connection, sexual consent, sexual contact, sexual encounter, sexual relationship, sexual violence, teaching consent, Upworthy, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Monica Lewinsky – The Price of Shame

Posted on March 30, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

This is wonderful. Thank you to Sarah Birdsall on Facebook for drawing it to our attention. Deeply thought-provoking, intelligent, heartfelt and moving – an inspiring example of someone who has taken their own horrible experience and transmuted it with courage … Continue reading →

Posted in abuse, bullying, civil rights, communication, conditions of worth, cultural questions, Disconnection, empathy, ethics, fear, grief, kindness & compassion, loneliness, loss, Monica Lewinsky, perception, political, power and powerlessness, resilience, sadness & pain, scapegoating, self, self concept, self esteem, shame, suicide, TED, transformation, trauma | Tagged abuse, affordable counselling exeter, betrayal, blame and shame model, Brené Brown, Buber, Buber I It, bullying, bystander apathy, civil rights, communication, compassion, conditions of worth, consent, consent to publication, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, cruelty, culture of humiliation, cyber-bullying, disconnection, embarrassment, empathy, ethic of service, ethics, exposure, fear, freedom of expression, grief, harassment, Human Rights, humiliation, internet bullying, Jennifer Lawrence, judgement, loneliness, loss, low cost counselling exeter, minority influence, Monica Lewinsky, mortification, Nicolaus Mills, objectification, online bullying, online harassment, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, perception, person centred counselling exeter, public humiliation, public shaming, publication without consent, recontextualising experience, recontextualizing experience, resilience, Self, self concept, self esteem, Serge Moscovici, shame, shaming, snapchat, Sony cyber-hacking, suicide, TED, transformation, trauma, trolling, Tyler Clementi, upstander, upstanding, vulnerability, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | 3 Comments

To Fix School, Make it Consensual – Blake Boles

Posted on November 19, 2014 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/blake-boles/to-fix-school-make-it-con_b_6158284.html Click on the link to visit Blake’s article on Huffpost – on the importance of consent, and the case for person-centred education….. Thanks to Brent Potter for putting us onto this. Here’s a link to Blake’s book:- http://www.amazon.co.uk/Art-Self-Directed-Learning-Unconventional-Education/dp/0986011959/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1416420321&sr=8-1&keywords=blake+boles+art+of+self+directed+learning Palace … Continue reading →

Posted in child development, cognitive, communication, creativity, cultural questions, education, empowerment, growing up, internal locus of evaluation, paradigm shift, parenting, person centred, person centred theory, political, power, teaching | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, Ana Martin, Art of Self Directed Learning, Blake Boles, child development, coercion, consensual education, consensual learning, consent, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, CS Lewis, disempowerment, empowerment, Ethan Mitchell, home schooling, Huff Post, Huffington Post, Libertarian Homeschooler, low cost counselling exeter, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, paradigm shift, parenting, person centered education, person centered learning, person centred counselling exeter, person centred education, person centred learning, person-centered, person-centred, self directed learner, self directed learning, tyranny, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

4 Ways Parents Teach Kids that Consent Doesn’t Matter: Parenting Gently with Paige

Posted on July 14, 2014 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Thank you (once again) to Monica Cassani and her site http://www.beyondmeds.com for posting this. A really useful short film about 4 basic changes we can all make to ways of parenting that are culturally common, but which can make it … Continue reading →

Posted in child development, childhood abuse, communication, core conditions, cultural questions, empowerment, family systems, growing up, internal locus of evaluation, Monica Cassani, parenting, person centred, relationship, sexual being, teaching, therapeutic growth, touch | Tagged assertiveness, autonomy, child development, confidence, conscious parenting, consent, developmental stages, http://parentinggently.blogspot.co.uk, internal locus, Marshall Rosenberg, Monica Cassani, Non Violent Communication, NVC, Paige, Palace Gate Counselling Service, parenting, Parenting Gently, person centred parenting, person-centred, saying no, self esteem, Touch, unwanted touch, unwelcome touch, www.beyondmeds.com | 1 Comment

SLS · Colloquia · A Model Consent Form for Psychiatric Drug Treatment: David Cohen & David Jacobs

Posted on July 13, 2014 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://laingsociety.org/colloquia/polofdiagnosis/modelconsent.htm This is a powerful document, first written in 1991 and regularly updated, making its points with facts and a touch of irony. Clients who come to us are often taking or thinking of taking prescription psychiatric drugs. We seldom … Continue reading →

Posted in anti-depressants, communication, healing, internal locus of evaluation, medical model, Palace Gate Counselling Service, psychiatric drugs, psychiatry, research evidence, working with clients | Tagged anti-depressants, Colloquia, consent, David Cohen, David Jacobs, diagnostic model, disorder model, DSM, external locus, internal locus, Joanna Moncrieff, medical model, medicalisation of distress, medicalization of distress, over prescription of psychiatric drugs, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Politics of Diagnosis, psychiatric drugs, psychiatric model, Psychiatry, www.laingsociety.org | Leave a comment

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