Tag Archives: armouring

Hearing the Cries of the World – Mark Nepo

Posted on April 23, 2018 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

https://parabola.org/2016/06/14/hearing-the-cries-of-the-world-by-mark-nepo/ “True connection requires that a part of us dissolves in order to join with what we meet. This is always both painful and a revelation, as who we are is rearranged slightly, so that aliveness beyond us can enter … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, awakening, community, compassion, consciousness, cultural questions, Disconnection, emotions, empathy, encounter, ethics, fear, flow, grief, growth, interconnection & belonging, kindness & compassion, loss, love, paradigm shift, perception, power and powerlessness, presence, relationship, resilience, sadness & pain, surrender, tears, transformation, trauma, violence, vulnerability | Tagged Abraham Heschel, affordable counselling exeter, Akhilandeshvari, aliveness, all our relations, allowing feeling, allowing vulnerability, armouring, authenticity, Avalokiteshvara, being alongside, being broken, being with anxiety, being with pain, being with suffering, belonging, Black Elk, bodhisattva, broken heart, caring for others, chi, collective compassion, collective heart, compassion, compassion fatigue, connectedness, connection, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, cries of the Holocaust, cries of the world, de-armouring, denial of being human, denial of humanity, Earth is the Lord’s, empathy, encounter, engaged heart, Enlightened Heart, expanding consciousness, expanding the heart, falling apart, fear of breaking and dissolving, fear of fear, feeling guilt, finding inner resource, finding inner strength, finding inward resource, finding inward strength, fully engaged heart, genocides, genuineness, Ghalib, going numb, grief bruises the heart, grief process, Guanyin, heartbreak, Heaven and Hell, holding the broken, holding the dying, honoring another’s pain, honouring another’s pain, how to help, importance of grief, importance of grieving, importance of lamenting, interbeing, interconnection, inward strength, Joseph Epes Brown, kindness, kinship, Kuan yin, Kwun, lacrimae rerum, lamenting, letting go, life energy, life force, living softly, low cost counselling exeter, making the mystery visible, Mark Nepo, Mirza Ghalib, mourning, mourning for others, mourning for the world, muting suffering, need to feel, need to internalise, need to internalize, need to process, never not broken, oneness, oneness with all things, opening the heart, opening to suffering, openness of heart, overload, overwhelm, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, Parabola Magazine, person centred counselling exeter, personal suffering, pleasure from suffering, powerlessness, pulling back, reclaiming humanity, refusal to stay vulnerable, replaying of tragedy, repressed grief, resistance, resources of life, Roman Holiday, running from fear, Sacred Pipe, sadism, sadness, saturation news coverage, Schadenfreude, sea of joy and sorrow, seeking to avoid suffering, sensitivity, shelter in the storm, simple caring, softening, song of existence, source of healing, space to reflect, spiritual growth, staying vulnerable, story-telling, suppressed grief, surrender, tenderness, tending the wounded, torn life, true connection, true kindness, unexpressed grief, unfolding, Unfurling, unnecessary suffering, unvoiced grief, violence, vulnerability, vulnerability and compassion, wanting to help, weight of grief, withdrawing, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Spinning Straw – Tracy Cochran

Posted on September 12, 2017 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

https://parabola.org/2017/07/30/spinning-straw-by-tracy-cochran/?utm_content=buffer9bcb5&utm_medium=social&utm_source=facebook.com&utm_campaign=buffer Click on the link above to visit the site for Parabola Magazine for this remarkable reworking of the Brothers Grimm. It is not long since we published a piece by Tracy – but the writer stumbled upon this at … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', abuse, acceptance, accountability, autonomy, beauty, blaming, boundaries, bullying, cognitive, compassion, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, consciousness, consent, core conditions, creativity, cultural questions, Disconnection, embodiment, emotions, empathy, empowerment, fear, feminine, good, gratitude, grief, growth, guilt, identity, interconnection & belonging, kindness & compassion, loneliness, loss, love, meaning, metaphor & dream, objectification, perception, power, power and powerlessness, relationship, resilience, sadness & pain, self, self concept, shadow, surrender, Tracy Cochran, transformation, vulnerability | Tagged abandonment, abuse of power, acceptance by the tribe, affordable counselling exeter, aliveness, aloneness, ancestors, armouring, Arthur Rackham, asking the impossible, autonomy, autonomy and acceptance, autonomy and belonging, bargaining, being in the shadows, being invisible, being left, being more, being unable to hold boundaries, betrayal, betraying love, betraying truth, betraying what you love, bitterness, boundaries, Brothers Grimm, causing harm, compassion, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, craving life, cut off from life, dare to be straw, deepest humanity, desecrated, desperation, diminishing ourselves, disconnection, divided, doing more, doing the math, ego mind, embodiment, empathy, emptiness, empty life, entitlement, everyone is special, everything is sacred, everything is special, evolutionary biology, existential emptiness, existential meaning, fairy tales, fear as a driver, fear of death, fear of loss, fear reaction, feeding people, feeling connected, feeling invisible, finding a place, finding balance, finding your reflection in another, folklore, fully alive, good enough, Great Mystery, guilt, having a place, having choice, heartfulness, here and now, holding yourself apart from love, holy work, how to live, humility, identity, inner smallness, internal division, invading boundaries, isolating behaviour, joy of connecting, joy of connection, keeping yourself alone, keeping yourself separate, knowing another, knowing each other, lacking choice, learning how to live, life is more precious than gold, listening without judgment, little rattle stilt, living experience, living fully, locating yourself, losing yourself, loss and grief, low cost counselling exeter, meeting needs indirectly, meeting needs obliquely, metamorphosis, metaphor, mind limitation, mind trap, mirror of another, mirror of love, mortality, myth, nameless, needing others, newborn, no such thing as magic, no-one is special, non possessive love, not good enough, not knowing yourself, not special, nothing is sacred, nothing is special, objectification, objectifying, ordinary and sacred, othering, otherworldly, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, power and powerlessness, power over, present moment, privilege, promises and betrayal, pure love, rage, reflection of love, relationship as transaction, remembering ourselves, resilience, responding and reacting, Rumplestiltskin, sacred love, sacredness, science and magic, science not magic, self acceptance, self armouring, self awareness, self betrayal, self concept, self denigration, self enclosed, self enclosure, self hate, self isolation, self knowledge, self limitation, self love, self rejection, self-structure, sense of sacred, shadow, small self, speaking unwisely, speaking wildly, spinning straw, spinning straw into gold, splitting, story-telling, stuckness, submissiveness, submitting, surrender, survival and acceptance, survival and belonging, telling tales, the first mother, The Heart of Oak Books, the wheel turned, the witness, Tracy Cochran, transformation, transience, trapped in your head, trying to explain, trying to save ourselves, trying to save yourself, turning wheel, unbounded love, unconditional love, using others, value of being alive, value of life, wanting approval, wanting closeness, wanting connection, wanting to be acceptable, wanting to be close, wanting to be known, wanting to be seen, wanting to belong, wanting to feel important, wanting to matter, wanting to please, web of life, what keeps us from love, wholesome work, without consent, without judgment, witnessing consciousness, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Raising your Havingness Ceiling – Toko-pa

Posted on October 3, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Raising your Havingness Ceiling Click on the above link for this wonderful post by Toko-pa, who is regularly featured here:- ‘As soon as we begin to feel resigned with things being as they are, it is time to resume the … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, actualizing tendency, awakening, beauty, consciousness, consent, creativity, empowerment, flow, gratitude, growth, meaning, metaphor & dream, perception, power and powerlessness, reality, risk, self, self concept, self esteem, surrender, Toko-pa, transformation, trust, vulnerability | Tagged ability to receive, abundance, acceptance of loss, affordable counselling exeter, armouring, completer finisher, consciousness, conversation with our edge, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creating abundance, creating an altar, creativity, cycle of life, de-armouring, dealing with rejection, death and rebirth, difficult experience, difficult feeling, dreaming big, encountering challenge, experiencing enthusiasm, experiencing joy, following through, forming intention, gratitude, gratitude journal, havingness, importance of risk, importance of vulnerability, inspiration, intention as prayer, limiting beliefs, living edge, low cost counselling exeter, manifesting abundance, meeting your edge, myth, never settle, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, paradox, person centred counselling exeter, possibility space, power of the unknown, practice of gratitude, realising potential, reality bending, realizing potential, receiving appreciation, receiving love, risking feeling exposed, risking vulnerability, ritual, scarcity mindset, self belief, self care, self esteem, self limiting beliefs, self protection, self worth, settling, settling for less, surrender, taking risks, Toko-pa, Tokopa, transition, uncomfortable experience, uncomfortable feeling, vulnerability, worthiness, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Pema Chödrön: What to Do When You Lose It Completely

Posted on July 21, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Just under 3 minutes of gold from Pema. What she suggests is a pause, a directing of the attention inwards, rather than into an/another explosion outwards of resentment or aggression. The purpose is an opening and a softening, to self … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', anger, blaming, compassion, conflict, core conditions, cultural questions, Disconnection, embodiment, emotions, empathy, forgiveness, guilt, kindness & compassion, love, mindfulness, objectification, Pema Chödrön, perception, presence, resilience, self, self concept, shadow, shame, shaming, surrender, violence, vulnerability | Tagged affordable counselling exeter, aggression, anger management, armouring, binary, compassion, conditions of worth, conflict, conflict resolution, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, de-armoring, de-armouring, dearmoring, dearmouring, disconnecting, embodiment, emotional chain reaction, escalating conflict, escalating rage, feeling your feelings, fire energy, going off on others, guilt, heat of anger, losing it, low cost counselling exeter, managing rage, manifesting reality, meeting fear, meltdown, objectifying, othering, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, Pema Chödrön, person centered conflict resolution, person centred counselling exeter, polarisation, polarization, rage, reactivity, reconnecting, relational connection, remorse, repressing emotion, repressing feeling, resentment, responding, responding not reacting, responding to fear, self acceptance, self calming, self compassion, self concept, self criticism, self denigration, self enquiry, self soothing, shadow, Shambhala, shame, shaming, tenderness, unconditional love, violence, vulnerability, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Never Read the Comments – Liz Gilbert

Posted on June 2, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

” This feels personally relevant to the writer, who has her own experience of group attack, including via the internet, and (some) people’s willingness to make sweeping and vicious statements about other human beings they have never met, based on one … Continue reading →

Posted in 'evil', abuse, acceptance, anger, autonomy, blaming, boundaries, bullying, compassion, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, conflict, cultural questions, Disconnection, empathy, empowerment, external locus, internal locus of evaluation, kindness & compassion, objectification, perception, political, power and powerlessness, resilience, sadness & pain, scapegoating, self concept, self esteem, shadow, shaming, trauma, violence, vulnerability | Tagged abandoning self, abuse, acknowledgement, acknowledging, actualising, actualizing, affordable counselling exeter, anticipation, anxiety, armouring, authenticity, awfulising, awfulizing, being of service, being seen, belonging, betrayal, blame and shame model, Brené Brown, Buber, Buber I It, bullying, bystander apathy, caring what others think, catastrophising, catastrophizing, civil rights, clarity of values, closing down, closing your heart, communication, comparing self with others, comparison with others, compassion, conditions of worth, connectedness, connection, consent, consent to publication, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, courage, creativity, critics don't count, cruelty, culture of humiliation, cyber-bullying, de-armouring, dealing with criticism, dealing with haters, dealing with uncertainty, disconnection, Elizabeth Gilbert, embarrassment, empathy, ethic of service, ethics, exposure, facing judgement, fear, fear of humiliation, fear of unknown, feedback, freedom of expression, gainsayers, grief, grieving, handling criticism, handling uncertainty, harassment, Human Rights, humiliation, ideal self, innovation, inspiration, interconnectedness, interdependence, internet bullying, judgement, judgemental attitudes, Liz Gilbert, loneliness, loss, love and service, loving presence, low cost counselling exeter, meanness, minority influence, Monica Lewinsky, mortification, objectification, online bullying, online harassment, opening your heart, originality, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, perception, person centred counselling exeter, personal history, personal shifts, presence, public humiliation, public shaming, publication without consent, realness, receiving feedback, recontextualising experience, recontextualizing experience, resilience, scarcity mindset, Self, self abandonment, self armouring, self blame, self concept, self critical, self criticism, self discipline, self doubt, self esteem, self judgement, self protection, self worth, self-structure, service, service of the work, shame, shaming, showing up, shutting down, snapchat, spiritual discipline, staying open, suicide, sweaty creative, TED, the man in the arena, the unknown, Theodore Roosevelt, transformation, trauma, trolling, trust, unkindness, upstander, upstanding, value system, valuing yourself, vulnerability, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Pema Chödrön on Blaming

Posted on March 19, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

“We habitually erect a barrier called blame that keeps us from communicating genuinely with others, and we fortify it with our concepts of who’s right and who’s wrong. We do that with the people who are closest to us and … Continue reading →

Posted in accountability, blaming, Brene Brown, communication, conditions of worth, cultural questions, Disconnection, ethics, external locus, objectification, Pema Chödrön, perception, political, scapegoating, self concept, shadow, shame, shaming, vulnerability | Tagged accountability, affordable counselling exeter, aggression, armouring, blame, blame and accountability, blame and responsibility, blaming, Brené Brown, Brené Brown on blame, bullying, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, de-armouring, dearmouring, disconnection, empathy, external locus, growth, healing, internal locus, low cost counselling exeter, oppression, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, Pema Chödrön, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, personhood, relationship, responsibility, RSA Shorts, scapegoating, self protection, shame, shaming, therapeutic process, truth and reconciliation, UPR, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

‘5 Signs You’re on the Hero’s Journey’ Alison Nappi

Posted on January 5, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://www.writewithspirit.com/blog/5-signs-youre-on-the-heros-journey Yesterday’s post included a Joseph Campbell reference, and today we remain with the themes of the hero’s journey, and the importance of mythology in our quest for meaning. Laurie Penny and Alison Nappi have written very different pieces around these themes … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, actualizing tendency, awakening, compassion, conditions of worth, consciousness, creativity, cultural questions, Disconnection, embodiment, empowerment, encounter, fear, flow, generational trauma, good, grief, growth, healing, human condition, identity, immanence, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, love, meaning, metaphor & dream, non-conforming, organismic experiencing, paradigm shift, perception, power and powerlessness, presence, reality, resilience, rewilding, risk, sadness & pain, self, self concept, spirituality, surrender, therapeutic growth, transformation, trauma, trust, vulnerability, wonder | Tagged ability, abyss, actualising, actualizing, adventure, affordable counselling exeter, alienation, Alison Nappi, aliveness, Anais Nin, ancestral pain, ancestral trauma, appearances, armouring, attachment, authenticity, awakening, awareness, Barbara Marciniak, being broken, being lost, being ready, being rebuilt, being unprepared, belief, bestowing boons, boundaries of worlds, brokenness, calling, changing your frame of reference, coercion, collective insanity, comfort zone, comfortable feeling, coming home, compassion, conforming, conformity, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, courage, craziness, creativity, cultural coercion, darkness, death and rebirth, deceit, defences, denying the call, despair, destiny, deviation from norms, difficult feeling, dignity, disintegration, divine will, divinity, Dr Who, dreams, dreamscape, DSM, eccentricity, ecstasy, edges of life, ego death, egoic death, embodiment, emptiness, encounter, escape, eternal self, eternity, ethic of service, existential meaning, failure, faith, falling, false self, fate, fear, feeling broken, feeling empty, feeling lost, finding your purpose, finding yourself, form, formlessness, frame of reference, freedom, Gaia, gifts, giving away our power, giving up, Great Mother, greatness, grief, healing, hero’s journey, hollowness, homecoming, hopelessness, human condition, human dignity, humanity, identity, illusion, imago, immanence, inability, inner sight, Joseph Campbell, Karma, leaping into the void, legend, light of being, limitations, loss, lostness, love, low cost counselling exeter, magic, makers of legend, manifestation, manifesting reality, Mary Oliver, meaning of life, meaninglessness, medicalisation of distress, medicalization of distress, mental illness model, metamorphosis, metaphor, monsters, mysterious adventure, mythology, newness, non conformity, non-conforming, not emotionally ready, not knowing, oppression, Oprah Winfrey, organismic, pain, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, past lives, pay attention, perception, permissible deviation, person centred counselling exeter, personal growth, personal power, potential, preparedness, presence, punching the clock, purpose, quest for meaning, questioning reality, Rainer Maria Rilke, readiness, reality, realness, rebirth, reclaiming power, redemption, refusing the call, reincarnation, responsibility, Rilke, Rumi, sacredness, search for meaning, Self, self concept, self confidence, self limitation, self protection, self-structure, separation, social coercion, social contract, soul, soul contract, soul purpose, spirituality, standing at the crossroads, stories, storytelling, success, surrender, tameness, the call, The Matrix, the Mother, thought crime, total loss, transcending limitations, transformation, trauma, treasure, true self, trust, uncomfortable feeling, unknowing, value of life, vision, visioning, vocation, wildness, will, willingness, without will, wonder, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk, your call | Leave a comment

Brené Brown: Why Your Critics Aren’t The Ones Who Count

Posted on November 25, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Another useful talk from Brené Brown, which explores creativity, criticism and how she has learned to deal with it. She talks about how important it is that those of us she calls the ‘sweaty creatives’ – or, borrowing from Theodore Roosevelt’s famous words, … Continue reading →

Posted in abuse, acceptance, actualizing tendency, blaming, Brene Brown, bullying, communication, conditions of worth, creativity, cultural questions, emotions, empathy, empowerment, fear, grief, growth, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, non-conforming, power and powerlessness, presence, resilience, sadness & pain, self, self concept, self esteem, shame, shaming, values & principles, vulnerability | Tagged 99U, abandoning self, acknowledgement, acknowledging, actualising, actualizing, affordable counselling exeter, anticipation, anxiety, armouring, authenticity, awfulising, awfulizing, being seen, belonging, Brené Brown, caring what others think, catastrophising, catastrophizing, clarity of values, closing down, closing your heart, comparing self with others, comparison with others, conditions of worth, connectedness, connection, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, courage, creativity, cruelty, de-armouring, dealing with criticism, dealing with uncertainty, disconnection, empathy, exposure, facing judgement, fear, fear of humiliation, fear of unknown, feedback, gainsayers, Get REAL, grief, grieving, handling criticism, handling uncertainty, humiliation, ideal self, innovation, inspiration, interconnectedness, interdependence, judgemental attitudes, love and service, loving presence, low cost counselling exeter, meanness, opening your heart, originality, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, personal history, personal shifts, presence, realness, receiving feedback, scarcity mindset, self abandonment, self armouring, self blame, self concept, self critical, self criticism, self doubt, self esteem, self judgement, self protection, self worth, self-structure, service, service of the work, shame, shaming, showing up, shutting down, staying open, sweaty creative, TED, the man in the arena, the unknown, Theodore Roosevelt, trust, unkindness, value system, valuing yourself, vulnerability, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | 1 Comment

Anne Lamott on the challenges (and grace) of being alive

Posted on November 1, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

‘Love and service are my business’ With humour, grace and gratitude. Thanks, Anne. Helpful reminders. Palace Gate Counselling Service, Exeter Counselling Exeter since 1994

Posted in Anne Lamott, beauty, child development, cognitive, communication, compassion, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, conflict, congruence, consciousness, core conditions, cultural questions, Disconnection, dying, Eating, education, embodiment, emotions, empathy, encounter, ethics, family systems, fear, friendship, generational trauma, gratitude, grief, growing up, guilt, human condition, humour, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, kindness & compassion, loneliness, loss, love, meaning, mindfulness, natural world, organismic experiencing, parenting, perception, physical being, power and powerlessness, presence, psychiatric drugs, relationship, resilience, sadness & pain, self concept, spirituality, teaching, tears, trauma, trust, vulnerability | Tagged addictive behaviour, adverse childhood event, adverse childhood experience, affordable counselling exeter, alienation, aliveness, Anne Lamott, armouring, balance, bereavement, binge drinking, binge eating, bipolar, bullying, childhood trauma, coercive conformity, coercive schooling, compulsive behaviour, conflict, control, core conditions, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, death, divorce, dying, education and conformity, education and standardisation, empathy, fear, fragmentation, grace, gratitude, grief, growing up, guilt, heartbreak, heartbroken, illness, judgment, judgmental, loneliness, loss, low cost counselling exeter, pain, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, parenting, person centred counselling exeter, power, powerlessness, presence, psychiatric medication, relationship, relationship break up, self concept, self protection, separation, spirituality, spiritually awake, suffering, terror, toxic relationship, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Brené Brown on Blame – The RSA Shorts

Posted on May 12, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

The writer found the animation a little distracting (for which she has decided not to blame The RSA). You may love it or you may consider closing your eyes for Brené’s neat little exploration of blame: what it is and what … Continue reading →

Posted in accountability, anger, blaming, Brene Brown, bullying, communication, conditions of worth, conflict, congruence, core conditions, criminal justice model, cultural questions, Disconnection, emotions, empathy, empowerment, encounter, ethics, external locus, growth, internal locus of evaluation, kindness & compassion, person centred, political, power and powerlessness, presence, relationship, shadow, shame, shaming, trauma, trust, violence, vulnerability | Tagged accountability, affordable counselling exeter, aggression, armouring, blame, blame and accountability, blame and responsibility, blaming, Brené Brown, Brené Brown on blame, bullying, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, de-armouring, disconnection, empathy, external locus, growth, healing, internal locus, low cost counselling exeter, oppression, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, personhood, relationship, responsibility, RSA Shorts, scapegoating, shame, shaming, therapeutic process, truth and reconciliation, uncon, UPR, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | 1 Comment

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