Tag Archives: absence

Belonging: Be the Longing – Toko-pa

Posted on March 28, 2016 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Click on the link at the end of this piece for Toko-pa’s wonderful post. ‘The ache to belong in friendship and community can be so pervasive that it colours everything we do.‘ The writer stumbled across these words yesterday, and … Continue reading →

Posted in acceptance, actualizing tendency, beauty, consciousness, core conditions, creativity, cultural questions, Disconnection, fear, friendship, grief, identity, immanence, interconnection & belonging, John O'Donohue, kindness & compassion, loneliness, loss, love, meaning, non-conforming, perception, presence, relationship, sadness & pain, self, spirituality, surrender, Toko-pa, transformation, trust, vulnerability | Tagged absence, ache to belong, actualising and belonging, actualizing and belonging, adrift, affordable counselling exeter, alienation, ambiguity, ancestors, Be The Longing, beauty, being seen, belonging, calling homeward, caretaking, certainty, community, compliance, conforming, consciousness, context, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creativity, diminishing ourselves, disconnection, dreamspeak, enlarging our lives, ethic of service, existential meaning, expansion, fear, finding our tribe, fitting in, fog of modernity, Francis Weller, friendship, gathering, generosity, giving, grief, heart's longing, humility, hungry ghosts, individuating and belonging, individuation, interconnectedness, interconnection, isolation, John O'Donohue, joining established groups, joining groups, kindness, Llama Surya Das, loneliness, longing, longing for community, low cost counselling exeter, Max Ginsburg, meaningful life, need for tribe, need to belong, non conformity, non-conforming, offering, orphan, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, paradox, person centred counselling exeter, presence, recognition, resilience, responsibility, ritual, Soul Activist, spiritual practice, spirituality, stewardship, suppressing own being, suppressing self, the responsible one, Toko-pa, tribe, unmet longing, validation, vulnerability, wanting to belong, What about me?, wisdom, writing, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk, yearning to belong | Leave a comment

How to prepare emotionally for the death of a difficult parent – Jeff Brown

Posted on November 11, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://soulshaping.com/soulshaping/difficult-parent/ Helpful piece, thanks Jeff. Palace Gate Counselling Service, Exeter Counselling Exeter since 1994

Posted in abuse, acceptance, actualizing tendency, awakening, blaming, body psychotherapy, bodywork, child development, childhood abuse, communication, conditions of worth, conflict, consciousness, cultural questions, dependence, Disconnection, dying, embodiment, emotions, empathy, empowerment, encounter, external locus, family systems, fear, forgiveness, generational trauma, grief, growing up, guilt, healing, human condition, identity, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, Jeff Brown, kindness & compassion, loss, love, parenting, perception, person centred, presence, reality, relationship, resilience, sadness & pain, self, self concept, self esteem, shame, shaming, surrender, transformation, trauma, trust, vulnerability | Tagged absence, acceptance, acknowledgement, actualising, actualizing, affordable counselling exeter, An Uncommon Bond, ancestors, ancestral pain, ancestral shame, Apologies to the Divine Feminine, Ascending, authenticity, awakened consciousness, awakening, awakening consciousness, bereavement, blame, blaming, body centered psychotherapy, body psychotherapy, bodywork, carrying it forward, child rearing, child self, childhood beliefs, collective consciousness, collective heart, completion, complex grief, conditioning, conditions of worth, confusion, connectedness, connection, context, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, death of mother, death of parent, developmental stages, dialogue, difficult relationships, disappointment, distorted perception, duty, dying mother, dying parent, embodiment, emotional absence, emotional armour, emotional baggage, emotional debris, emotional paralysis, emotional risk, emotional safety, emotional threat, empowerment, encounter, familial ancestors, familial relationship, family relationship, fantasy, forgiveness, forgiving, gender, generational healing, generational pain, generational trauma, grief, grief process, grief therapy, grieving, grieving difficult relationships, guilt, healing, healing conflict, healing rifts, healthy connection, heartbreak, human condition, human development, human limitations, imprints, incomplete, individuating, individuation, inner narrative, interconnection, interdependence, internalised guilt, internalized guilt, introjections, Jeff Brown, Karmageddon, karmic ancestors, kindness, learning to value ourselves, letting go, life experiences, loss, loss of mother, loss of parent, Love it Forward, loving parenting, loving relationship, low cost counselling exeter, metamorphosis, mystification, narrative, need for fantasy, obligation, overcoming, pain, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, parenting, perception, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, personal beliefs, personal transformation, presence, process work, protective mother, psychotherapy, reality, realness, recognition, reflection work, reflective work, rejection, relational dynamics, relationship, relationship therapy, religious perspective, repressed emotions, resolution, safety, self abuse, self blame, self concept, self distraction, self esteem, self love, self protection, self validation, self worth, self-structure, separation, shame, shame and abuse, shame game, shaming, Soulshaping, Spiritual Graffiti, stagnation, surrender, survivalist conditioning, sustainable transformation, talk therapy, talking therapy, tenderness, therapeutic process, therapeutic work, therapy, things unsaid, threat response, toxic parenting, toxic relationship, transformation, unactualized dreams, unconsciousness, unexpressed anger, unhealed grief, unresolved experiences, unresolved memories, validation, validation from others, vigilance, vulnerability, wanting attention, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Everything Doesn’t Happen For A Reason – Tim Lawrence

Posted on November 10, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://www.timjlawrence.com/blog/2015/10/19/everything-doesnt-happen-for-a-reason#st_refDomain=www.facebook.com&st_refQuery=/ Immensely useful piece on the importance of grieving, and the unhelpful violence of platitudes and imposed ‘positivity’. As Tim says, we have a deeply harmful cultural inability to speak the language of grief or offer what is most needed – loving … Continue reading →

Posted in communication, core conditions, cultural questions, Disconnection, dying, empathy, encounter, friendship, grief, healing, human condition, interconnection & belonging, loneliness, loss, love, non-conforming, presence, relationship, resilience, sadness & pain, self concept, shadow, shame, shaming, tears, transformation, trauma, trust, violence, vulnerability | Tagged absence, accompanying, acknowledging experience, acknowledging pain, adversity, affordable counselling exeter, being with difficult feeling, being with grief, being with uncomfortable feeling, bereavement, betrayal, brokenness, brutality, carrying pain, consequences of loss, core conditions, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, cultural attitudes to grieving, cultural attitudes to loss, death, dehumanising, dehumanizing, delusional narrative, depersonalisation, depersonalization, despair, devastation, distress, dying, emotional violence, empathy, everything happens for a reason, evolution, fallacy, fantasy, fragility, freedom, grief, grieving, growth, healing, heartbreak, hiding, hopes, hubris, human experience, loss, loss and growth, loss of dreams, lost dreams, lost opportunities, love, low cost counselling exeter, making change, Megan Devine, necessity of grief, need to grieve, non-conforming, pain, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, person centred counselling exeter, personal development, personal responsibility, platitudes, positivity, post traumatic growth, presence, psychological violence, relationship, relationship break up, resilience, responsibility, sanctimony, self concept, self hatred, self help, self reliance, self-sabotage, self-structure, separation, shadow, shame, spiritual violence, suffering, survival, survivor’s guilt, taking responsibility, The Adversity Within, Tim Lawrence, tragedy, transformation, trauma, turning away, understanding, vulnerability, willingness, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

Reclaiming Sweet Freedom – 23 things that we need not explain justify or defend – Isabel Abbott

Posted on September 22, 2015 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

http://www.elephantjournal.com/2015/09/reclaiming-sweet-freedom-23-things-that-we-need-not-explain-justify-or-defend/ Just gorgeous. This is written from the woman’s perspective, and the writer wants to expand it to include all of us (with any tweaks required to find the right fit for you). It’s wonderful, profound, poetic and important. Thanks, … Continue reading →

Posted in abuse, acceptance, actualizing tendency, awakening, beauty, blaming, compulsive behaviour, conditions of worth, congruence, consciousness, core conditions, creativity, cultural questions, dependence, diversity, Eating, Elephant Journal, emotions, empathy, empowerment, encounter, equality, ethics, external locus, fear, feminine, flow, Gender & culture, grief, growth, guilt, healing, human condition, humour, identity, immanence, interconnection & belonging, internal locus of evaluation, loss, love, meaning, mindfulness, non-conforming, organismic experiencing, paradigm shift, parenting, perception, person centred, physical being, political, power and powerlessness, pregnancy, presence, reality, relationship, resilience, sadness & pain, self, self esteem, sexual being, sexual orientation, shadow, shame, shaming, surrender, transformation, trauma, trust, vulnerability | Tagged absence, accusation, affordable counselling exeter, Aftermath, apologising, apologizing, approval, art, authenticity, autonomy, awakening, becoming, belonging, boundaries, censoring, change, changing your mind, choice, comfort, compulsion, compulsive behaviour, conforming, conformity, connection, control, conviction, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, creativity, defending yourself, dependency, desire, disappointment, disapproval, discomfort, distortion, divorce, ecstasy, Elephant Journal, embodied being, embodiment, emotional abuse, emotions, ethics, experiential truth, explaining yourself, falling in love, fear, fear of being misunderstood, fear of food, feelings, feminism, freedom, gas lighting, gender, getting needs met, grief, growth, human needs, impulse, inexplicable sadness, inner work, integration, interconnection, interdependence, intimacy, invasive behaviour, Isabel Abbott, joy, judgement, judgment, learning, longing, loss, loss of self, love, loving ourselves, low cost counselling exeter, marriage, mindfulness, misunderstanding, need for reassurance, non-conforming, not knowing, obsession with food, oppression, organismic, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, parenting, perception, permission, person centred counselling exeter, person-centered, person-centred, personal work, personhood, presence, purging poison, rationalising, rationalizing, reality, reassurance, reclaiming self, regret, relationship, restlessness, right to be you, right to exist, sadness, saying no, self acceptance, self care, self defence, self doubt, self expression, self justification, self liberation, self realisation, self realization, sexual being, sexual love, sexuality, shadow, shame, shared narratives, social approval, story, surrender, terror, transformation, trauma, trust, trusting ourselves, truth, uncertainty, verbal abuse, vulnerability, wanting, witnessing, writing, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment

David Whyte on Friendship

Posted on December 14, 2014 by Palace Gate Counselling Service

Click on the link for David’s Facebook page, and this beautiful photograph of entwined trees and profound reflection on the importance of friendship. We particularly like:- ‘An undercurrent of real friendship is a blessing exactly because its elemental form is … Continue reading →

Posted in communication, David Whyte, empathy, family systems, forgiveness, friendship, grief, healing, human condition, interconnection & belonging, kindness & compassion, loneliness, love, parenting, presence, relationship, therapeutic growth, trust, vulnerability | Tagged absence, affordable counselling exeter, armoring, belonging, compassion, connection, Consolations, CONSOLATIONS The Solace Nourishment and Underlying Meaning of Everyday Words, counselling exeter, counsellor Exeter, counsellors Exeter, David Whyte, disconnection, family relationships, forgiveness, grief, healing, human condition, interconnection, kindness, loneliness, loss, love, low cost counselling exeter, mortality, Palace Gate Counselling Service, Palace Gate Counselling Service Exeter, parent child relationship, person centred counselling exeter, presence, relationship, transcendence, transience, trust, vulnerability, witnessing, www.palacegatecounselling.org.uk | Leave a comment